Compendium of Fake Tech and Wonder Quotes

[DizzKneeLand33]

Natural History - "Had I been present at the Creation, I would have given some useful hints for the better ordering of the universe." - Nelson Algren (Misattributed)
This is the paraphrased sentiment of Alfonso X of Castile, reported by Thomas Carlyle.
Nelson Algren is not related to this quote in any sense. Probably they consulted a paper dictionary such as Oxford, and confused the name with the adjacent one? (See this preview)

I looked at your preview, and I am just absolutely appalled. My fourth grade teacher would have flunked me out for such an error. We have programmers who cannot even read reference materials properly....

 

[Philly D.]

For The Wheel, they could have the quote in French from Civ4 (they changed some quotes, but not the narration), paraphrased as: "The wheel of fortune turns faster than that of the windmill". (Cervantes)

 

[Archaelicos]

I don't think you have a very good grasp on what is grounds for being fired in a non-theoretical IT job.

It was a joke, dude.

 

[CaiusDrewart]

Hi OP, first of all thank you for your interesting research. I'm making a similar attempt at Japanese Civ6 Wiki, and I'd like to share my results.

Wheel - "The wheel turns slowly, but it turns." - Lorne Michaels (Misattributed)
There is no source that Michaels said this.
Henry Miller used this phrase in his book "The Wisdom of the Heart" (1947), which is obviously earlier than Michaels. Although I'm not sure if this is the first appearance of this saying or not.

Stirrups - "Betwixt the stirrup and the ground, Mercy I asked, mercy I found." - William Camden (Misleading)
This quote actually appears in Camden's book, but it's not his word. It's from one of the anonymous epitaphs Camden collected.

Banking - "If you owe the bank $100 that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem." - J. Paul Getty (Misattributed)
No source for Getty.
Apparently Keynes had the same concept prior to Getty. But as Keynes also stated, it should be called as "the old saying" with unknown origin.

Astronomy - "Astronomy compels the soul to look upwards and leads us from this world to another." - Plato (Misleading)
The quote is real, but it's not what Plato want us to believe. This is the view of Glaucon, the disciple of Socrates, and Socrates immediately negates it right after this sentence. Appears in "Republic" Chapter 7.

Guidance Systems - "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you were heading." - Lao Tzu (Fictitious)
I checked the original Chinese text and found nothing close to this.
I have an assumption that it MAY be a very twisted & unorthodox translation of the first sentence of Chapter 27, but the gap between them is too large anyway. It's safe to say that this quote is entirely fictitious.

Foreign Trade - "Every nation lives by exchanging." - Adam Smith (Altered)
This quote can be found in Book 1 Chapter 4, but it actually starts with "Every man", not nation.

Natural History - "Had I been present at the Creation, I would have given some useful hints for the better ordering of the universe." - Nelson Algren (Misattributed)
This is the paraphrased sentiment of Alfonso X of Castile, reported by Thomas Carlyle.
Nelson Algren is not related to this quote in any sense. Probably they consulted a paper dictionary such as Oxford, and confused the name with the adjacent one? (See this preview)

Great finds! I did not go through every quote (I just looked at the ones that immediately jumped out at me as implausible) so I am not at all surprised there are more errors in there.

The Natural History mistake is just crazy. Understandable, I guess, but still crazy.

 

[Gorbles]

It was a joke, dude.

Jokes are meant to be funny and preferably not at the expense of other people. It separates good comedians (and comediennes) from the bad "lol r u offended" types.

 

[DizzKneeLand33]

It was a joke, dude.