Compendium of Fake Tech and Wonder Quotes

[ezzlar]

"A lot of people are saying those quotes are real!"

 

[Larsenex]

Personally I love all the quotes. I think folks that are having a hard time with them are taking things too seriously. We are playing a game after all.......

 

[CaiusDrewart]

"A lot of people are saying those quotes are real!"

Haha that's true. Civ VI is a perfect fit for our new post-truth society

 

[topresch]

"King Solomon gave the Queen of Sheba all she desired and asked for; besides what he had given her out of his royal bounty. So she turned and went to her own country, she and her servants." - 1 Kings, 10:13

This quote is for the Great Zimbabwe wonder. Insofar as it relates to the Great Zimbabwe at all, it appears to refer to the 19th century theory that an expedition of King Solomon and the Queen of Sheba were responsible for constructing the Great Zimbabwe. This is a completely racist and unsubstantiated idea that only arose because some racist European scholars could not believe that Africans could have accomplished such impressive architectural feats. Why Civilization decided to include a nod to this racist drivel, I have no idea.

This is mind-boggling. Never having built this wonder (as of yet), I was unaware of the quote. But the use of such a blantantly racist reference, albeit probably rather extremely clumsy than malicious, is hard to fathom in a major game from a major developer. And SO unnecessary.

Good thread! Love critical views and good sleuthing!

Edit: I am not shocked and chagrined or appalled. Rarely does that happen with me. Life's too short. Just amazed

 

[Ryika]

Personally I love all the quotes. I think folks that are having a hard time with them are taking things too seriously. We are playing a game after all.......

That's about the weakest excuse one can give about those quotes. You're basically saying: "Guys, it's only a game, lower your expectations!"

Games come in many forms, and while Civ was never too serious overall the Flavor Texts were always written in a more serious tone, with mostly factual information.
Between Civ 5 and Civ 6 the standard of the Quotes, and really the Flavor Texts in general just took a nosedive, silly jokes, false quotes, quotes that don't fit the time they refer to, lack of actual information... it's hardly surprising that people are unhappy with that.

And I mean, it's not only us elitists here at Civfanatics, there've also been huge posts on the Civ Subreddit, and that Community I would generally describe as more casual in attitude.
So if even they take issue with it in large numbers, then I'd say there is something to it.

 

[PhilBowles]

Yes, the Einstein quote about him wanting to be a watchmaker is also inaccurate--though that one appears to just be a major distortion of something Einstein actually said, whereas this cartography one was conjured out of thin air. Neither should be in the game.

There are plenty of other problems, too-- for instance, people have pointed out that Space Race quote about the Russians using pencils is simply flat-out wrong.

The quote about the Russians using pencils is correct as a quote, though I don't know whether Will Chabot was the one who coined it. It's factually incorrect (well, not quite. The Russians did use pencils - but the Americans did too. And both researched alternatives), but that doesn't imply no one said it. It's fairly well-known as a quote, in fact.

While I think people are too hard generally on Civ VI's quotes - the miss rate isn't high, just much higher than in the last two games - ones that were simply never said or that are misattributed should indeed be corrected or removed. And in that category I include ones that 'resemble' something that was said or that has a standardised English translation.

 

[Patine]

Civ2 for life for me. It all just went downhill after that. *waves cane to chase the kids off my lawn after boring them with stories of walking every day to school barefoot in the snow uphill both ways*

 

[PhilBowles]

That's about the weakest excuse one can give about those quotes. You're basically saying: "Guys, it's only a game, lower your expectations!"

Games come in many forms, and while Civ was never too serious overall the Flavor Texts were always written in a more serious tone, with mostly factual information.
Between Civ 5 and Civ 6 the standard of the Quotes, and really the Flavor Texts in general just took a nosedive, silly jokes, false quotes, quotes that don't fit the time they refer to, lack of actual information... it's hardly surprising that people are unhappy with that

Civ V had no more misses than Civ IV, which treated us to a Johnny Cash quote for Railroad and decided the most insightful thing it had to offer on a technology as momentous as the wheel was "Put your shoulder to the wheel".

Civ VI is undeniably a big step down from both, but isn't without its gems and simply has more quotes, thanks to having them for each civic and natural wonder as well as each tech. The only ones I consider actively atrocious are the Kilimanjaro and air conditioning ones (though plenty of others are bad, misplaced or uninspired).

 

[PhilBowles]

It seems that fairly thorough homework has already been done on this subject: https://forums.civfanatics.com/threads/compendium-of-fake-tech-and-wonder-quotes.606341/

 

[Graethyenne]

Not trying to threadjack, but you inspired me to think through a possible solution - https://forums.civfanatics.com/threads/quote-supplementation-replacement-interest.606344/

Feel free to share thoughts and opinions.

 

[Morningcalm]

As to the humor point: History is meant to be inspirational first, humorous perhaps on occasion, but Civ VI took things too far with the misfiring humor quotes (many of them aren't even funny, which is the most egregious sin of many of the faux-humor quotes in VI). A return to the mix of inspiring, solemn, thoughtful, humorous or interesting quotes of Civ IV would be nice (and to my knowledge, most of the quotes were actual quotes).

Excellent sleuthing by the OP (many of us in this thread likely didn't even check the quotes). It's a shame Firaxis' hasty speech research shows here. They could use a consultant for the entire Civilopedia too, which is mostly composed of modified Wikipedia entries with extra brackets added.

 

[Disgustipated]

While I understand redoing some of the quotes with Sean Bean is cost prohibitive there is no reason they can't get someone else to do quotes (Civ4 did this with their expansions rather than pay the big bucks to bring back Leonard Nimoy for the new technologies). I myself want to hear a female give the tech quotes. It's about time. It doesn't have to be someone famous, in fact, I'd rather it not be someone famous. But I do prefer a professional voice actor (unlike the person who gave the tech quotes for Civ4 expansions- he sounds like a computer programmer LOL).

I'd like a redo of the erroneous quotes, and also some additional quotes so there are at least 2 quotes for each technology. Some already have 2, but not all.

 

[PhilBowles]

As an exercise, here's what I find as suitable substitute quotes in quick Googling, to demonstrate just how little effort is required to top these (in true Civ VI style, making no effort whatsoever to double-check their veracity):

Cartography: "Maps codify the miracle of existence.” - Nicholas Crane

Flight: "The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.” - J.M. Barrie, "Peter Pan"

Alternative version: "The airplane stays up because it doesn't have time to fall" - Orville Wright

Military Science: "Before a war military science seems a real science, like astronomy; but after a war it seems more like astrology." - Rebecca West [I actually prefer the 'Churchill' quote, but they'd need to find the correct attribution or note 'misattributed' - though the link given for suggesting this is false itself provides no basis for that]

Telecommunications: This can probably just be attributed to William H. White. Or, for a quote more specifically relevant to the tech:

"Advances in the technology of telecommunications have proved an unambiguous threat to totalitarian regimes everywhere." - Rupert Murdoch

Not sure which tech the newspaper quote relates to.

Scientific Theory: "I think a strong claim can be made that the process of scientific discovery may be regarded as a form of art. ... A well constructed theory is in some respects undoubtedly an artistic production." - Ernest Rutherford

Alternative: “A mere inference or theory must give way to a truth revealed; but a scientific truth must be maintained, however contradictory it may appear to the most cherished doctrines of religion.” - David Brewster

Nuclear Fission (I think this is the source of the watchmaker quote): "The fundamental point in fabricating a chain reacting machine is of course to see to it that each fission produces a certain number of neutrons and some of these neutrons will again produce fission." - Enrico Fermi

Alternative: "France generates a significant part of its energy requirements from fission reactors and these have achieved a perfect safety record. We build ours all differently. " - Wilson Greatbach.

Archery: "A good archer is not known by his arrows, but his aim." - English proverb

Education: The sentiment of the actual quote is fine - simply use the correct version.

The Churchill quote can be amended

The Space Race quote is fine, and widely-known. It's not factually accurate, but nor's the Garrison Keller quote about air conditioning (much as I hate that quote, it's not for its technical inaccuracy).

Great Zimbabwe: "Among the gold mines of the inland plains between the Limpopo and Zambezi rivers there is a fortress built of stones of marvelous size, and there appears to be no mortar joining them.... This edifice is almost surrounded by hills, upon which are others resembling it in the fashioning of stone and the absence of mortar, and one of them is a tower more than 12 fathoms high. The natives of the country call these edifices Symbaoe, which according to their language signifies court." - Vicente Pegado

To add insult to injury, this latter is actually in the Wikipedia entry for Great Zimbabwe.

While we're at it, let's fix Kilimanjaro:

"From former experience I had learned that it is useless to dream of an ascent of Kilimanjaro, and a prolonged stay above the snow-line, without the aid of a companion familiar with mountaineering. ... The relationship is so intimate and so constant, there is such close community of interests and experiences, that… there must be the most perfect agreement in tastes and habits of mind between the two comrades" - Hans Meyer

Alternative: “Kilimanjaro is a snow-covered mountain 19,710 feet high, and is said to be the highest mountain in Africa. Its western summit is called the Masai 'Ngaje Ngai', the House of God. Close to the western summit there is a dried and frozen carcas of a leopard. No one has explained what the leopard was seeking at that altitude.” - Ernest Hemingway

 

[Rathelm]

Personally, I hate ~90% of the game's quotes, and I'd love to see them changed. I've done some digging and I'm very confident that a great many (perhaps half) of the Civ tech quotes were gotten simply by googling "[tech name] quote" and taking the first result that seemed reasonable. This was a really lazy effort. But I understand that some people like the flippant tone; that's fine. To each their own.

But anyway, at the very least, they could delete this inaccurate quote and just have one quote for Cartography. Or change the attribution so that it is correctly attributed to cartography blogger Gretchen Peterson, not US president John Quincy Adams. I understand that mistakes happen, but I don't think they should knowingly keep bad quotes in the game. Civ shouldn't spread misinformation like that. The truth is worth something!

Why delete the quote? All they'd have to do is attribute it to "some dude on the internet".

 

[Disgustipated]

I'm just going to reprint my other post one more time in the chance Firaxis may read this and fix this part of the game. I know we can't expect them to fix everything, but outright lies should be fixed. Sorry for reprinting this twice, but we have 3 threads on the same subject.

While I understand redoing some of the quotes with Sean Bean is cost prohibitive there is no reason they can't get someone else to do quotes (Civ4 did this with their expansions rather than pay the big bucks to bring back Leonard Nimoy for the new technologies). I myself want to hear a female give the tech quotes. It's about time. It doesn't have to be someone famous, in fact, I'd rather it not be someone famous. But I do prefer a professional voice actor (unlike the person who gave the tech quotes for Civ4 expansions- he sounds like a computer programmer LOL).

I'd like a redo of the erroneous quotes, and also some additional quotes so there are at least 2 quotes for each technology. Some already have 2, but not all.

 

[orasis]

Not sure why this matters, at all.

It's a game... not a history book.

 

[WillowBrook]

Not sure why this matters, at all.

It's a game... not a history book.

Some of us like to pick up fun trivia or even occasionally learn something interesting or important while playing. It's annoying when the game provides incorrect or misleading information.

 

[GhostSalsa]

Not sure why this matters, at all.

It's a game... not a history book.

It matters that the quotes are awful for the exact same reason they are in the game at all.

 

[GhostSalsa]

It shouldn't matter that they sunk money into having Sean Bean read the terrible quotes. They are terrible and need to be replaced. They don't help the game and need to be replaced. It's a great mercy they can just do this, the game is updatable, all they have to do is drop their fetish for the nerd celebrity white dude gimmick. Also, his delivery is nothing special at all, it may as well be the voice of an old man who manages the check lanes at Target telling you the store is closing in 10.

Literally Firaxis just walk to a library and yank out whoever is doing the story time readings there, it will be better.

But yeah female voice would be great. Non native English accent great too. And more quotes themselves should be from non-western sources.

 

[PhilBowles]

It shouldn't matter that they sunk money into having Sean Bean read the terrible quotes. They are terrible and need to be replaced. They don't help the game and need to be replaced. It's a great mercy they can just do this, the game is updatable, all they have to do is drop their fetish for the nerd celebrity white dude gimmick. Also, his delivery is nothing special at all, it may as well be the voice of an old man who manages the check lanes at Target telling you the store is closing in 10.

Literally Firaxis just walk to a library and yank out whoever is doing the story time readings there, it will be better.

But yeah female voice would be great. Non native English accent great too. And more quotes themselves should be from non-western sources.

Here's an idea - how about a male voice for the male quotes and a female one for the female ones? It worked for Alpha Centauri.

Sean Bean's delivery certainly makes some quotes sound worse than they are - with the tone they went for with many of the quotes they'd have been better off approaching John Cleese, Stephen Fry or Hugh Laurie.