Dilemma

[Bugfatty300]

So I started a relationship with a girl, Nayeli, in Mexico last year. We met a few months before I left. I saw her again I when I returned last December. We've been exchanging emails and chatting on MSN ever since.

So I tell her I am going back in May and she invites me to stay at her house. Now it's been about two months since her last E-mail. I've sent her several but she never responds. Her friends tell me that she doesn't have enough money to pay for time in an internet cafe. (I don't believe that). I've tried calling her but her but she her mom and sister always says "ella juega futbol" or "ella fue a la arcada."

Though I did talk to her (very briefly) on MSN a month ago. She said she loves me and wants me to stay with her in Mexico. But since then I have not spoken to her.

Earlier this year my friend's dad said Nayeli was pregnant (it turns out isn't true, just gossip) and we nearly broke up because of that.

I've just about given up on her. In the past few weeks I've started talking to someone else here and even another girl in Mexico. But so far I have been nothing but faithful to her. I'm still hesitant about breaking up with her since I love her but this stuff is keeping me up at night.

 

[Truronian]

Write her a letter explaining how you feel. If she doesn't reply to that, I'd just forget her...

 

[Nylan]

The biggest thing to remember is that love is a partnership, requiring effort from both parties. You can give her a chance, in fact you can give her as many as your heart will let you.

Just make sure you watch for the line (if you don't already feel it has been crossed) where there is no more relationship, only you are putting in effort. Sometimes when a relationship is so one sided that it's hurting you, that it's damaging your mental state and life, you have to let them go. Even if you love her.

You can talk to her about partnership if you like, or you can take a step back a little bit. If you do, she may realize just how important you are to her and that she can't afford to lose you.

Just a few possibilities, and I could be off.

 

[Abaddon]

Jus drop her.. it was a relationship only a few months long.. plenty more fish in the sea.. you shouldnt be working so hard just to contact her when she blatantly isnt trying herself. Stop kidding yourself and move on.

 

[Bugfatty300]

Write her a letter explaining how you feel. If she doesn't reply to that, I'd just forget her...

Done. Well, it was more like a break up/ultimatum email.

Copy + paste of the last paragraph.
"Estoy consado de escritura de tu emails y tu nunca contesta. Te amo pero tu rotura mi carazon. Si tu no quiere hablar con mi entonces deberiamos romper ahora."

Basically "I am tired of writing you emails and you never answering me. I love you but you are breaking my heart. If you don't want to talk to me then we should break up now"

We'll see how she responds (if at all) to that.

Jus drop her.. it was a relationship only a few months long..

Well, its almost been a year if you count the time I was home.

 

[Abaddon]

Well congrats for having the balls to send that email.

You are still being a bit delusional about a year.. its a year since you met her true.. but if you havn't really contacted at all for a few months, and not actually seen each other in longer than that..

As you have said there are other interests so dont worry over it.






BTW, i am not trying to be mean.. im just trying not to give you wishywashy answers with ifs and buts.. im not faffing about on the fence peaching about love conqors all etc

 

[Bugfatty300]

Well congrats for having the balls to send that email.

Seemed like the only thing to do at this point. What does she expect me to do? Go and see her and then pretend we hadn't hardly talked for two months? I'm tired of coming home at end of the day checking my email hoping she has emailed me.

BTW, i am not trying to be mean.. im just trying not to give you wishywashy answers with ifs and buts.. im not faffing about on the fence peaching about love conqors all etc

Yes I know.

If you do, she may realize just how important you are to her and that she can't afford to lose you.

Funny thing is that is what my friend keeps saying about HER. If so, I'm not a tool to be manipulated. If that is her game then its about to backfire on her big time.

 

[Neonanocyborgasm]

So I started a relationship with a girl, Nayeli, in Mexico last year. We met a few months before I left. I saw her again I when I returned last December. We've been exchanging emails and chatting on MSN ever since.

So I tell her I am going back in May and she invites me to stay at her house. Now it's been about two months since her last E-mail. I've sent her several but she never responds. Her friends tell me that she doesn't have enough money to pay for time in an internet cafe. (I don't believe that). I've tried calling her but her but she her mom and sister always says "ella juega futbol" or "ella fue a la arcada."

Though I did talk to her (very briefly) on MSN a month ago. She said she loves me and wants me to stay with her in Mexico. But since then I have not spoken to her.

Earlier this year my friend's dad said Nayeli was pregnant (it turns out isn't true, just gossip) and we nearly broke up because of that.

I've just about given up on her. In the past few weeks I've started talking to someone else here and even another girl in Mexico. But so far I have been nothing but faithful to her. I'm still hesitant about breaking up with her since I love her but this stuff is keeping me up at night.

This smells of "Another Man Syndrome."

 

[Masquerouge]

Long-distance relationships are never easy. Have you tried looking for someone closer?

 

[Bugfatty300]

This smells of "Another Man Syndrome."

You're good.

Anyway, I talked to two of her friends today on MSN. (I've been talk to them frequently lately) Turns out she dumped me along time ago, found another guy and told her two friends to tell me. Well the two friends decided not to tell me so that I would still go to their town. Why? Because I sounded cool and they wanted to meet me.

I told them that that was the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life and they could both go to hell. They were actually suprised that I was angry with them.

So I guess the mystery is solved. I'm actually laughing about it because I am so relieved over this.

Long-distance relationships are never easy. Have you tried looking for someone closer?

Where I live dating, is nearly impossible. The only way is in the local college or near by cities.

 

[thenooblet22]

So I started a relationship with a girl, Nayeli, in Mexico last year. We met a few months before I left. I saw her again I when I returned last December. We've been exchanging emails and chatting on MSN ever since.

So I tell her I am going back in May and she invites me to stay at her house. Now it's been about two months since her last E-mail. I've sent her several but she never responds. Her friends tell me that she doesn't have enough money to pay for time in an internet cafe. (I don't believe that). I've tried calling her but her but she her mom and sister always says "ella juega futbol" or "ella fue a la arcada."

Though I did talk to her (very briefly) on MSN a month ago. She said she loves me and wants me to stay with her in Mexico. But since then I have not spoken to her.

Earlier this year my friend's dad said Nayeli was pregnant (it turns out isn't true, just gossip) and we nearly broke up because of that.

I've just about given up on her. In the past few weeks I've started talking to someone else here and even another girl in Mexico. But so far I have been nothing but faithful to her. I'm still hesitant about breaking up with her since I love her but this stuff is keeping me up at night.

Maybe you got too clingy? Not a very attractive feature. Trying to contact her obsessively might prove her point

 

[Colonel]

Shoot her! simple and effective

 

[Bugfatty300]

Trying to contact her obsessively might prove her point

I didn't try to contact her obsessively. I've sent her 3 emails in the past two months. Four including the last one I sent. She would send me 2 or 3 a day just a few months ago.

But that doesn't even matter considering what actually happened.

 

[Truronian]

You're good.

Anyway, I talked to two of her friends today on MSN. (I've been talk to them frequently lately) Turns out she dumped me along time ago, found another guy and told her two friends to tell me. Well the two friends decided not to tell me so that I would still go to their town. Why? Because I sounded cool and they wanted to meet me.

I told them that that was the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life and they could both go to hell. They were actually suprised that I was angry with them.

So I guess the mystery is solved. I'm actually laughing about it because I am so relieved over this.



Where I live dating, is nearly impossible. The only way is in the local college or near by cities.

That's slightly twisted...

 

[Bugfatty300]

Well, she sent me a reply. She wrote to me in English for some reason. Her English is very bad and she may have used a translator. (Which don't work very well) I can hardly undterstand what she wrote.

Hello my love. I believe I must give an explanation to you about the other day that I was myself and I did not say good bye to you is that they warned me that my sister broke her foot and I had to go and in addition very you were occupied with your friend and I did not want to you to bother you (OK this is a lie. She knew I wanted to talk to her and the only reason I was talking to her friends was so I could get in touch with her.) were platicando (chatting) with yesenia and karina and I am annoying with them because if...

[They] were my friends because they [would not have?] betrayed to me. know that they are not yours. you know that I love you but you do not want to me but I will understand affection and discúlpame to it by ignórate but you know that I love yo and I will always. perdóname (forgive me) and I have not a free time to talk when because I have much task

and I believe that you do not deserve this but we spoke of which happens around to my because I am not well and every day I cry deciding everything

te amo brent

I simply replied: Tu no me ama porque tu esta con otro hombre. No busqueme o hablame en San Martin.

It seems to me there is some sort of soap opra going on here where her friends are trying to break us up.

But I don't care if she is cheating on me or if her friends just lied to me. She is ignoring me no matter how many "tasks" she says she has. I know now that she goes to the internet cafe very often (not every month like she said) and she could spare some time to write a coherent email to the person she claims to love.

 

[Jawz II]

Sorry dude, it seems to me just about anyone can afford to buy a stamp and write a letter.

I think it's over, but if you really have to know for sure, just go there and find out for yourself, but be prepared for the worst.

This smells of "Another Man Syndrome."

It does.

 

[Bugfatty300]

I think it's over, but if you really have to know for sure, just go there and find out for yourself, but be prepared for the worst.

I'm going there anyway. Just not to see her. We need to stay there for a few weeks before continuing down the continent.

I'd rather just end it now than get there and be humiliated.

 

[Jawz II]

hmm? I think if you did go there and found she had a new fellow, it would be humiliating for her.

I would not feel humiliated in a situation like that, just really self-righteous and angry.

 

[Bugfatty300]

hmm? I think if you did go there and found she had a new fellow, it would be humiliating for her.

I would not feel humiliated in a situation like that, just really self-righteous and angry.

She just got on MSN about an hour ago. Apparently now she wants to discuss it. Well now its too late.

Anyway she "confessed" to seeing someone esle but said she wasn't seeing him anymore. I broke up with her and told her to screw off and she says she loves me and to forgive her and everything but I had already made my mind up. If I forgave her then she'd just think I was weak and exploit me more. So I made it clear she wasn't to speak to me again.

I'd look like a naive fool to go there and see her thinking we could work it out. I would love to yell "chingate puta!" at her in person. I'd rather just break up now and then get with one of her ex-friends.

 

[warpus]

a long-distance, cross-border relationship? that only works for james bond