Dumb Quotes

[Bigfoot3814]

"Dispensin' an erector" -TF2 voice chat

People say that ALL the time. I think it's funny. Most do it on purpose, though.

 

[holiday_hawk]

"A zebra can't change it's spots" Good ol Dan Quayle

 

[Bigfoot3814]

"A zebra can't change it's spots" Good ol Dan Quayle

He's not wrong, really. I defy you to name one time a zebra ever changed its spots.

 

[Eran of Arcadia]

I have heard "a leopard can't change its stripes" attributed to Al Gore, which I find about as likely as the zebra one. That is, not very.

 

[Huayna Capac357]

Hahahahaha..........why are our VPs so bad at quoting things?

 

[Onionsoilder]

From a guy in my engineering class:

"I carried 600 pounds, all by myself with three other people!"

"That plane dove into a steep climb"

"Once I volunteered as a signer for the blind."

 

[holiday_hawk]

He's not wrong, really. I defy you to name one time a zebra ever changed its spots.

Haha you do a point.

here are some more Dan bloopers

and here

 

[gangleri2001]

My natural sciences teacher of high school, who always confuses the words chicken and kitchen, tried once to give us the class in English. During that class, we were dissectiong a dead chicken. During that dissction he said:

"Let's open up the chest of this kitchen."
"This kitchen had long tendons."
(While moving a tendon of the chicken and pretending that the dead chicken was doing us the "fukc you" gesture) "This kitchen was a bad mothafukca!"
"You see? All this blood and guts let us know that this is a real kitchen. This is not the sort of kitchens that you can buy at Kentucky Fried Kitchen."
"Have you ever seen a kitchen flying? I've never seen a kitchen flying."
"Did you see the movie "Kitchen run"? Well, this kitchen, as you can see, wasn't in there."

And many, many other dumb quotations. As far as I'm concerned, this was his last try to give a class in English. Since then, he only gives his classes in Catalan.

PS: BTW, a the end of the class somebody had the balls to tell him what do the words kitchen and chicken mean.

 

[_random_]

"I believe that gay marriage should be between a man and a woman."-The Governator

 

[Princeps]

"Communism needs democracy like the human body needs oxygen."
–Leon Trotsky

He said socialism. And he's correct.

 

[Fifty]

some Mike Tyson quotes:

“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

(on Lennox Lewis) "My main objective is to be professional but to kill him."

"I really dig Hannibal. Hannibal had real guts. He rode elephants into Cartilage."

"I guess I'm gonna fade into Bolivian."

 

[Huayna Capac357]

My friend said this while he was kicking me out of his house:

"I'm not kicking you out of my house; I'm just telling you to leave!"

 

[FriendlyFire]

Where he’s wrong is that we went into Iraq at the invitation of the government, not as an invasion.
We’re in Iraq as the result of a democracy asking for us to come in there. It’s not an invasion.
Dic_ Morris - Fox News Aug 22nd, 2008

WTH is wrong with Republicans these days ????

 

[kristopherb]

"I thought Stalin was American"
"Wheres England?"

 

[PreLynMax]

"If Jimmy cracks corn, and no one cares, why does he keep doing it?"
-Pinky from Pinky and the Brain

"I can't win nor can I lose."
-My sister

 

[Bigfoot3814]

"If Jimmy cracks corn, and no one cares, why does he keep doing it?"
-Pinky from Pinky and the Brain

Better question: why is there a song about him?

 

[uat2d]

"Beep... Beep... Beep... Beep" - Sputnik II

 

[Eran of Arcadia]

"Beep... Beep... Beep... Beep" - Sputnik II

I thought Sputnik II said "Woof... Woof... cough, hack, choke"

 

[Deep Thought]

I thought Sputnik II said "Woof... Woof... cough, hack, choke"

 

[Harbringer]

I thought Sputnik II said "Woof... Woof... cough, hack, choke"

That story really eats at me for some reason.....and it was overheating I believe, not suffocation.