Arrrr, I want to clarify what I said about the AI in reference to yet another expansion pack in, what, a year? 8 months? It requires taking a look at the history of the Civ series. 10 years ago or so, this guy Sid, a board game enthusiast, thought it would be fun to put his favorite game into a computer format. Long story short, out comes Civ I, which was some kind of hit. There wasn't really anything else like it at the time. So Sid figures he's onto something, he comes up with some new ideas, puts a team together, and when he gets to the point that he has a Whole New Game, he releases the thing, bam, Civ II is born, gamers all over the world get really excited about it, etc. Compare Civ to Civ II... they both have certain format and conceptual things in common, but let's face it, Civ II is about an order of magnitude greater than Civ I in terms of advancement and what not. Hey, not that Civ is without charm, the point is Civ II really is an order of magnitude greater. Then years go by, SMAC and that civil war simulation come out, which I never played, but as I understand it they were widely accepted as Completely Different Games. Sure, they again had certain format and concept similarities, but you see my point. Then, once the team had put toghether enough ideas to come out with yet another Whole New Game, they start releasing information about Civ III. Remember the months before it arrived, all the screenshots, all the discussion about the culture aspects, the new victory conditions, the new civs with their attribute aspects, there was all kinds of things to say about it to get people excited, and rightly so, because again, while it has certain format and conceptual things in common with Civ II, I think everyone agrees, it's really a Whole New Game.
A Whole New Game.
It didn't just take Civ II and add a unit here, a civ there, and call it good. The thing had an entirely different look, entirely new aspects that changed the gameplay approach altogether in some ways. The scope and depth of it were so much greater that it was, well, another Order of Magnitude greater than Civ II. Game enthusiasts were just about jumping out of their pants when it came out. And ok, it didn't take long to notice that the Civ III AI does things fairly regularly that are more than just bad moves, they're DUMB moves, they're pointless, Idiotic moves. But hey, Civ III was a Whole New Game, the learning curve is long, it has the kind of depth that, for what it is, people are really glad Civ III came along. The AI, well, lets face it, computers as we know them haven't been around too long, games like this are still in their infancy really, they tend to be quirky, Civ III is no exception. But at least it's a Whole New Game. A really fun one, too.
But now, correct me if I'm wrong please, hasn't the company that produces the Civ series changed hands? Listen people, like in Old Testament times, like Moses' plagues of frogs and locusts, America today is plagued with a blight of Corporate Wankers. Yes my friends, probably as a punishment for America's greed and artlessness, Corporate Wankers have multiplied like crazy out of the country's warped values. What are they? Well, they don't pound nails or drive delivery trucks, they don't cook meals or serve them, they don't make and recieve the phone calls in offices or hook up networks or fix the power lines or write songs or pick up the trash or do anything that's actually worth a couple bucks to you or me. And they sure don't come up with ideas for, develop and program Whole New Games. No, Corporate Wankers, while they may have acquired a lot of money somewhere, don't really do anything but keep their eyes peeled for 'viable franchises' and 'established brands' and 'loyal followings'. They check out stuff like p/e ratios and market trends and the like. When they see something they like, they go in and buy up the whole thing. Then they take an attitude with everyone involved, now that they're in charge, telling them 'Y'know guys, if you followed a really smart business model, we could put out product every 10 months, what with our name recognition and franchise viability and all. This thing you've created can be... Repackaged... and sold again, with enough hype, with enough press releases. And then, y'know what, it can be... Repackaged again... and sold again. Quit fooling around doing all that work, let's start selling'
And so here we are. Remember Play the World? C'mon, it was a buggy mess for one. And for two, if you subtract everything that you could download right off this webpage you're reading right now, how was it different from Civ III? Medieval Warriors? The Internet? Warriors that burn roads? Puhhh...leeeeze! It looked the same, the music is the same, it played the same. The multiplayer seemed to not live up to expectations. Even after multiple patches. It's Civ III in a different box, sold to you once again by Corporate Wankers.
And now here they come again. Conquests. It'll have new civs, trebuchets, ok, One new victory condition, and what, One new diplomatic option. C'mon folks, do we see what's going on here? When I criticized the AI of Civ III, comparing it to a simulation of all the lead poisoned idiot leaders of history, well, that's meant to apply to any future Civ product that uses the same AI. And how does Atari respond? "We don't want to promise features that we can't deliver. But it'll be bug free!!!" Since when did being bug free become a selling point for a software product?!??!?
So come on, Firaxis, let's lose the lid on the details of this 'expansion pack' you're putting out. Don't give me a political answer. YES or NO: Is the AI in this new game overhauled and greatly improved, or not? Is it tweaked a little, or an Order of Magnitude improved? Is this going to be a Whole New Game, or can I get the new units and luxuries by playing GOTM21? You don't want to promise features you can't deliver??? What? Have your newcorporate wanker masters put you on a product release schedule that bears no relationship to when you have a Whole New Game to release, or not? Are you just going to release...something... by a certain target date, and whatever you have time to do by then is what will be included, and that's why you don't want to get in depth about what is really in it? Please!
So look, I've enjoyed the e-company of my fellow civ fanatics in the past year and a half. We've got all kinds of people involved with this thing on-line now, sort of a microcosm of society really, and I know the kind of enthusiasm that surrounds the real McCoy, a Whole New Civ game. If corporate wankers are going to butt in and turn the thing into a Widget. Yes, a widget for mass production, they're gonna get Ripped Off, and it is going to spoil the whole thing. I don't want to see this happen. I think others will echo me when I say: I DEMAND MORE PRODUCT! If it takes 3 years to develop a Whole New Game, please don't release anything until its ready. If the new scenarios are really that cool, put them on the net, hey, maybe charge $5 subscriptions for it, but don't turn Civ into another Widget, ok?
. In anycase, do pass the word to Firaxis and let them know that we'd like to soo some meatier upgrades on the AI front compared to the more minor ones in PTW.
I mean you do understand what I mean, right ?
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