Most wtf total war events in your game?

[Civ001]

So what were the most wtf moments in the current Total War game that you have been playing? What did they do?

 

[Traitorfish]

In a recent(ish) game of M2TW as Scotland at war with France, the French king wandered in front of one of his own cannons and was blown to pieces.

I think the poor guy must have been depressed.

 

[scheva007]

I thought the AI was so much better in rome 1 and medievall 2? Must be nostalgia...

In medievall 2, a historical battle that was over 15 seconds after the intro, cause my king was dead with the first shot

 

[Phrossack]

M2TW is the only one I have, but I love it. Too many weird things have happened to list or even remember them all.

To name a few: I once invaded Hungary as the Turks in the late game. A big field battle began, and my army's first shot, a cannon ball, hit and killed the Hungarian general instantly.

I also noted that Portugal and Spain seem to view Ireland and Wales as some kind of holy land; they always, without fail, landed a small stack led by either their king or their heir to attack Caernarvon or Dublin.

And in one game as Spain, the Scottish and English were always at war. For some reason they always loaded up their armies onto ships, sailed to my northern coast, disembarked, fought, and went back home to repeat the cycle. Maybe they liked Spain's weather more. In any case, the Scottish eventually won, took over the British Isles, and invaded my northern coast by sea. My pike and shot armies annihilated them and proceeded to conquer their entire empire in short order, but still. What the hell, Britons?

 

[schlaufuchs]

I also noted that Portugal and Spain seem to view Ireland and Wales as some kind of holy land; they always, without fail, landed a small stack led by either their king or their heir to attack Caernarvon or Dublin.

This was a very common occurrence after CA released a patch to make naval invasions more common. For some reason it was always Ireland or Wales that got invaded, and only ever from Iberia. It should be noted that the AI in the pre-S2 (or maybe ETW) games was really really bad (the notorious tactical vs strategic dual-AI system) resulting in some admittedly comical occurrences. The most prominent, of course was the random nation declaring war on you with an army of 2 peasants only to accept a white peace the next turn, only to declare war on you again the next turn. The reason this happens is because the tactical AI wants to fight you but the strategic AI realizes that they don't have anything to fight with and would lose easily, resulting in the tug of war between the two interests.

 

[salty mud]

In a recent(ish) game of M2TW as Scotland at war with France, the French king wandered in front of one of his own cannons and was blown to pieces.

I think the poor guy must have been depressed.

You're doing it wrong. Scotland are meant to be allied with France so you can teach us filthy English a lesson or two.

Anyway, I'll never forget the moment my Carthaginian general was killed by my own elephant. The elephant died and fell right on top of him. Instantly splatted. Army commences mass rout and the rest, as they say, is history.

 

[Golden1Knight]

I lost three generals with one shot. I was playing TATW, with the High Elves. Damn catapults.

 

[Ajidica]

Pre-patch Empire Total War (not sure if they ever fixed it) saw my Maratha swordsmen showing the invading Portugese Musketeers their line-dancing skills.
Unfortunately, the Portugese decided not to wait for my Maratha swordsmen to finish their routine, instead vaporizing them.

 

[Maniacal]

That bug is still there, even with Darth's Mod (which despite his claims can't actually improve the AI much because the AI files are not moddable directly).

 

[Civ001]

What has been the weirdest thing that has happened to you in your total war game that you played?

Moderator Action: Merged these threads as they are nearly identical.