Next War PBEM

[Eclipse4449]

Ugh if this is the case it was played but not sent but I'll check when I get home tonight but just to be safe and save time plz resend. I'll check my played and sent folders

 

[Nighthawk419]

Resent 2068 AD to Eclipse just now.

 

[Eclipse4449]

My sincerest apologies for the delay, I indeed still had the original save in the Nest War folder ready to play so I must have been distracted and dropped the ball

I uploaded the turn via pbemtracker and in addition sent it via email just to be sure, if it worked let me know and I'll just upload only

 

[Luthor_Saxburg]

I've played all my PBEM's today! All? WEll, all but one... don't need to say which one, do I?

 

[Imperator Knoedel]

I've played all my PBEM's today! All? WEll, all but one... don't need to say which one, do I?

Relax, I´m on it.

 

[Imperator Knoedel]

Eclipse´s turn from PBEM-Tracker worked, but I couldn´t upload mine so I sent it the traditional way.

The Europan Empire has resumed peaceful relations with Asia and We are already discussing the details of how We are going to conquer The Lady´s territory.

Speaking of:

This was Baghdad. Nice city, it´s really a pity We had to burn it down and kill off all men, women and children in it.
We hope The Lady finally comes to her senses and accepts Our generous peace offer, for her subjects´ sake.
Btw there is one extra condition on top of you handing over Palestine and Lybia: We wish to take your personal assistant Jesus into custody for the crimes he committed against the Europan crown. Don´t worry, he´ll be fine, We just want to gift him to Our Prime Minister as a sex slave for her birthday. We know she doesn´t always agree with Us and can be quite annoying, but since We could only track 3% of the assassination attempts against Our person this month back to her she seems to be the most trustworthy member of Our court.

Also We want to once again extend an invitation for joining this war on Our side to Mr. Big, whose neutrality in this matter unsettles some of Our advisors.

 

[shlks]

I come in here randomly, those demands are ludicrous Knoedel. Seems you provide us a wonky sense of humor. TriU has been pretty hush-hush lately. Hub? Meh. My other game has been going pretty good however.

 

[Imperator Knoedel]

I come in here randomly, those demands are ludicrous Knoedel.

Which ones? Palestine, Lybia and a sex slave or the conditions named in the declaration of war?

 

[Eclipse4449]

Baghdad destroyed? I'm sure this news will travel the Globe.

 

[Luthor_Saxburg]

The America Inc workers were shocked to hear about the destruction of such an historical city!!!

A manifestation to protest against it was organized by the Union and everyone was mobilized. But... on that day there was also the premiere of a new reality show so the attendance to the protest was quite low...

Mr. Big has sent a formal protest to the European CEO against the destruction of Baghdad. In the formal letter he recommended that, in the future, it would be wise to minimize the suffering of the population and not to maximize it. He mentioned that "wars are a terrible thing so I kindly ask to all the nations involved to avoid razing entire cities"!

.

 

[Imperator Knoedel]

The America Inc workers were shocked to hear about the destruction of such an historical city!!!

A manifestation to protest against it was organized by the Union and everyone was mobilized. But... on that day there was also the premiere of a new reality show so the attendance to the protest was quite low...

Mr. Big has sent a formal protest to the European CEO against the destruction of Baghdad. In the formal letter he recommended that, in the future, it would be wise to minimize the suffering of the population and not to maximize it. He mentioned that "wars are a terrible thing so I kindly ask to all the nations involved to avoid razing entire cities"!

.

It's not as if We had much of a choice. Conquering territory is easy, holding it not so much. We would like to remind the holier-than-thou American CEO that We might have just kept the city if more Southern troops were distracted elsewhere, like, say, in Panama.
*hint* *hint*

 

[Nighthawk419]

I have to go eat dinner with my family, so no time for much right now, but gps

I will have some good screenshots tomorrow!

 

[Imperator Knoedel]

I will have some good screenshots tomorrow!

Why, did you gift-wrap Jesus already?

 

[Nighthawk419]

View attachment hahaha.bmp



Jeeves, in a message broadcasted to the entire world:

"Greetings friends and enemies. Recently forces from Europe have invaded the Lady's city of Baghdad, defeating our forces there. After their invasion was won, they brought civilization back thousands of years by burning down the city, acting like the Mongol hordes of ancient times. We would tell our people not to fret, as the citizens of the city were able to escape before too much harm was done to them personally. Enraged at seeing their city burning, the citizens took up arms and attacked their invaders, and with the support of the largest and most powerful military in the world, the entire invading force from Europe has been destroyed, with minimal losses. We would thank those who died in the invasion of Baghdad, as your deaths were not in vain. While the city may be destroyed, it can and will be rebuilt, and now that the European invasion force has been destroyed, we can and will take revenge on His Excellency personally. Future generations of Islamic Baghdadians will remember this day, as our first act in New Baghdad will be to built a tomb to remember those who did die and were not able to fight their invaders.

In other news, Jesus II has put on his leather gear... however this leather gear holds grenades and guns and nuclear weapons, which will be used to smite the enemies of the Lady. We strong urge His Excellency to capitulate to the Lady now. Hand over Istanbul and Algiers peacefully and in exchange she would be willing to make a personal appearance to sign a peace treaty."

And an out-of-character note: Those 4 Mechanized Infantry were more than I would have received if I had drafted the entire city of Baghdad down to 0!!! If that is the exchange I must make to destroy the largest quantity and biggest quality units of Knoedel's army, I will take it!

 

[Imperator Knoedel]

Well, We would like to execute Our military advisors if not for the fact that they told Us that exactly this was gonna happen. Alas, this was a suicide commando anyway and since Baghdad held one of The Lady's most esteemed military academies [OOC: West Point was there.] We still consider the operation a strategical success.
Also you obviously underestimate the sheer amount of manpower We are ready to throw at anything We consider a threat, We are currently sitting in front of a Stalin portrait after all. We would also like to remind you that everything you fought up to date was old pre-One World Government weaponry and that your dust cleaning only motivates Us to build some new fancier toys instead of the infrastructure programs We had originally planned. Furthermore you are currently leading a two-front war and We doubt that The Glorious Leader will just sit back and watch should you decide to utilize nuclear weapons, not to mention that this could also motivate the Americans to intervene.

 

[Nighthawk419]

Well, We would like to execute Our military advisors if not for the fact that they told Us that exactly this was gonna happen. Alas, this was a suicide commando anyway and since Baghdad held one of The Lady's most esteemed military academies [OOC: West Point was there.] We still consider the operation a strategical success.
Also you obviously underestimate the sheer amount of manpower We are ready to throw at anything We consider a threat, We are currently sitting in front of a Stalin portrait after all. We would also like to remind you that everything you fought up to date was old pre-One World Government weaponry and that your dust cleaning only motivates Us to build some new fancier toys instead of the infrastructure programs We had originally planned. Furthermore you are currently leading a two-front war and We doubt that The Glorious Leader will just sit back and watch should you decide to utilize nuclear weapons, not to mention that this could also motivate the Americns to intervene.

Jeeves: "The Lady is not worried about the loss of Her military academy. Baghdad was not able to produce units at any good speed anyway, so the benefit of the academy was nil. Call the units outdated all you want, but our empires are on relatively equal terms when it comes to technology, so She does not understand how you could produce bigger and better units all of the sudden. It will take some investment in technology before that will happen, and the Lady's science advisors have been working on new technology themselves, too. The fact is we jsut exchanged a few unpromoted, drafted Mechanized Infantry for a very large offensive stack of yours. Our units are leaving promoted just like the military academy would have given them thanks to your pathetic attempt. And now we have the advantage of numbers over Istanbul! There is no second front to this war, the Glorious Leader was smart enough to sign a peace treaty with the #1 world power. And Mr. Big is more concerned with his reality TV shows then he is about the happenings in Europe. I wouldn't be surprised to see him attack the heart of Europe from London, considering he has a large unit advantage right at your back door..."

 

[Imperator Knoedel]

Jeeves: "The Lady is not worried about the loss of Her military academy. Baghdad was not able to produce units at any good speed anyway, so the benefit of the academy was nil. Call the units outdated all you want, but our empires are on relatively equal terms when it comes to technology, so She does not understand how you could produce bigger and better units all of the sudden. It will take some investment in technology before that will happen, and the Lady's science advisors have been working on new technology themselves, too. The fact is we jsut exchanged a few unpromoted, drafted Mechanized Infantry for a very large offensive stack of yours. Our units are leaving promoted just like the military academy would have given them thanks to your pathetic attempt. And now we have the advantage of numbers over Istanbul! There is no second front to this war, the Glorious Leader was smart enough to sign a peace treaty with the #1 world power. And Mr. Big is more concerned with his reality TV shows then he is about the happenings in Europe. I wouldn't be surprised to see him attack the heart of Europe from London, considering he has a large unit advantage right at your back door..."

Pah! Your pathetic lies convince nobody! Alone that you have the guts to suggest that The Glorious Leader, Our most trusted ally and almost as good a military leader as Ourself, would have turned his back to Us in Our hour of need, is a grievious insult to Our intelligence! Why,...
*As he rambles on about how superior he is and how he and Asia will crush The Lady some advisors are seen drawing straws in the background. The one who drew the shortest gulps and steps toward His Excellency, fear in his face and a tablet in his hand.*
"Ehem, excuse me Sir, but you might want to take a look at this before you further humiliate yourself in front of the world."
"What? It can´t possibly be important enough to interrupt this broadcast, but since We are in a good mood We shall take a quick glance at it."

*His Excellency´s face when the bubble popped would be known for eons as the 21st century´s funniest picture. Within minutes various GIFs were created as he became a meme. For a minute he just stood there, not a muscle moving except for his twiching left eye, which spawned yet another meme. Then he threw a royal fit from which only 10% were actually broadcasted thanks to the automatic real-time censor that was specifically installed for this occasion.*

...WHY THAT...TREACHEROUS...SNAKE...BURN DOWN...BY THE GRACE OF...CAESAR...ICE CREAM...DON´T...TELL ME THE...CAMERA...IS...STILL...RUNNING...OH YOU...IMBECILE...CRÉTIN...

OoC: Won´t play the turn today as I obviously have to reevaluate the current geopolitical situation.

 

[Nighthawk419]

Jeeves would like to remind His Excellency that the current offer is still on the table: We will accept peace in exchange for Istanbul and Algiers. We would much rather accept them as part of a peace treaty than deal with the destruction taking them personally would bring...

 

[Eclipse4449]

The Glorious Leaders Network signs on.
The Glorious Leader appears center screen as if to address the people but says nothing for 3 minutes, his expressionless gaze slowly changes to Rage and signs off the air.

 

[Luthor_Saxburg]

TURN ON. MUSIC. Voice Message: "I have file. No time to play. Will play later tonite or tomorrow." END OF MESSAGE. TURN OFF