1. We have added a Gift Upgrades feature that allows you to gift an account upgrade to another member, just in time for the holiday season. You can see the gift option when going to the Account Upgrades screen, or on any user profile screen.
    Dismiss Notice

Pacal's (Ball) Court

Discussion in 'Civ4 - Stories & Tales' started by Flouzemaker, Oct 5, 2007.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    After the moderately acclaimed "Gilgamesh's Court," and the somewhat heralded "Suleiman's Harem," Flouzemaker (that's me) presents...

    Pacal's ( Ball ) Court!

    You, the poor, unsuspecting reader, shall be able to, well... read this possibly tall tale of triumph, glory and/or humiliating defeat, provided that you do indeed possess the arcane knowledge of reading English.
    Furthermore, you'll eventually be reading this potentially (though probably not) spectacular saga in "real time."
    When the story finally reaches the date of 1 AD... that's where I'll be in the game! You, for the first time, shall be able to enlighten me with your wisdom (gawd knows I need it) and, for once, I'll actually be able to use your counsel.

    For now, however, you'll only get the starting location at 4000 BC. I have some leaders to draw, so it'll take some time until I reach 1 AD...

    Still, we might as well proceed.

    Our game looks like this:


    A small, rocky, big & small map with Island mixed in, low sea level and normal speed. Actually, I wanted "epic" but forgot to put it at epic... so we're at normal. Too lazy to restart another game.

    In addition, we have "diplomatic victory" turned off, eliminating the Apostolic Palace and the UN.

    We'll be competing against nine other A.I.'s, so I expect we'll be packed rather tighly. Just in case that doesn't generate enough conflict, our beloved barbarians shall be raging.

    And who is our potentially heroic leader? Just in case you didn't notice the subtle hints, it is:


    Pacal II, the soon to be Great!

    PACAL! After years of wandering around aimlessly, your people, the Mayans, have accidentally made YOU their leader!
    Me?
    Yes, you!
    Wow. Sucks to be the Mayans, huh?
    Fear not, young Ahau, for I shall grant you a lifespan of at least 6050 years!
    SCORE!
    That is, of course, only if some other Civilization doesn't wipe you off the face of the earth.
    Oh. Sucks to be the Mayans, huh.
    Of course, you cannot be expected to wisely lead your people without some sort of council. Meet your first adviser:


    Lady Zac Kuk
    MOM?!?!
    Where did you put you cape, child?
    My cape?
    You'll catch a cold!
    I guess I didn't want to trip on it or something. What are you doing here, mom?
    I'm here to help my little boy, of course! I'll be taking charge of science, culture, and religion. And my good little boy'll listen to mommy, right?
    ~sigh~
     
  2. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    Of course, one adviser cannot be enough.
    Obviously.
    And so, you'll also be counseled by the newly appointed War Chief...


    Kan Bahlum Mo'
    Dad!
    It's an honor, son! I am wise in the ways of war, young Ahau. Heed my words and we shall thrive.
    Sure, dad.
    We cannot trust the enemy. Always remember that.
    Whatever.
    Do not take diplomatic matters lightly, son!
    Right. Can I see our starting location, now?
    Certainly!



    Oy! I hope no one is allergic to sea food!
    I certainly hope we're not on a tiny little island...
    Even if we are, though we might grow and produce a little slowly at first, the sea will provide us with ample food and science. This is a good place to found Mutal.
    Mutal? No. We're founding Lakam Ha first! I'm the Ahau of Lakam Ha, and as such, Lakam Ha shall be our Capital! We'll research Fishing to get working on our Crab sources ASAP. Meanwhile, I'll send our Warrior, Scroll Zero Bird, to the North-East. I know I could pop that hut, but I'll let our cultural borders do that later on.




    And so, while I busily draw a few leaders, you may have fun with the start save in 4000 BC. If you do choose to play it - please refrain from posting "spoilers" about future neighbors and stuff.
    ;)
     

    Attached Files:

  3. Ozbenno

    Ozbenno Fly Fly Away Moderator Hall of Fame Staff

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2006
    Messages:
    11,449
    Location:
    Sydney, Australia
    Already looking forward to this!

    That's a lot of seafood you've got there. Good for the whip. Bronze Working would be a priority and a granary (Pottery) for all that whipping.

    Good luck.
     
  4. Peng Qi

    Peng Qi Emperor

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    1,429
    Location:
    Irrelevant.
    Be glad they added the Moai Statues to the game. :D
     
  5. Qwack

    Qwack The Poopman

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2006
    Messages:
    836
    Flouzemaker, you have a great series going here. Ive read both of your previous games, and looking forward to this one also.
     
  6. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    Speaking of which... can I whip a National Wonder?
     
  7. obliterate

    obliterate Warrior Monk

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2007
    Messages:
    1,305
    Location:
    Melbourne, #fiftychat
    Course you can. You can whip anything.
     
  8. Killroyan

    Killroyan Deity

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2006
    Messages:
    2,099
    OMG OMG OMG OMG HE IS BACK!!!!!!

    All together again:
    1
    2
    3
    FLOUZEMAKER!!!!!!

    Totally subscribing again. Lets get the family feuds start.
     
  9. RockTheCazbah87

    RockTheCazbah87 Pacal's pal

    Joined:
    May 28, 2007
    Messages:
    649
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Manhattan, NY
    Pacal re-united with his mom and dad!

    :lol:

    Subscribed!
     
  10. e350tb

    e350tb Stupendously Illogical Englishman

    Joined:
    May 24, 2007
    Messages:
    1,870
    Location:
    The Britcave
    Reading on.
     
  11. Guardian_PL

    Guardian_PL Emperor

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2006
    Messages:
    1,231
    Flouzemaker, You've just made my day :goodjob:
     
  12. Ozbenno

    Ozbenno Fly Fly Away Moderator Hall of Fame Staff

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2006
    Messages:
    11,449
    Location:
    Sydney, Australia
    You can but it costs more population to do so.
     
  13. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    3800 BC:

    My sweet little boy's going to be happy! The cultural borders of Lakam Ha have expanded... popping the nearby hut!
    Whadda we git? Whadda we git?
    60 gold.
    Oh.
    Ah, but son, Scroll Zero Bird has been exploring, and he'll visit a barbarian village as well!



    OOOH! Whadda we git? Whadda we git?
    We get...




    I, Darius I, welcome Pacal II, ruler of the upstart nation of Maya.
    I get an ice cream salesman?
    Do not be confused by the crown. It might look delicious, but it hides the world's most dangerous weapon!
    The rattiest, filthiest most unsavory wad of balding hair?
    No! My brain, of course! Shall we have peace?
    Certainly! By the way, you've got something, there, on your chin... better wipe if off, dude.
    Beg your pardon? Where? Did I get it?
    Yeah! You just pulled on it!
    What, my beard? Its only decorative facial hair, son! When you'll be old enough, you'll have one too.
    No I won't. See you 'round!
     
  14. Peng Qi

    Peng Qi Emperor

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    1,429
    Location:
    Irrelevant.
    Hah! Despite your attempt at cliffhanging, I can see what the goody hut gave you in the picture! :D
     
  15. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    Hmm... I don't know why, but it feels like I'm forgetting something. I was looking forward to something, and then was rudely interrupted...
    The hut, young Ahau.



    HOODY HOO!!!
    There's a party going on right heeere... a celebration to last throughout the years!
    Right.
    So bring your good times, and your laughter too! We gonna celebrate your party witchooo!
    What are you doing, dad?
    We're gonna have a good time tonight!
    Ceeeeleeebration!

    We're gonna have a good time tonight!
    Ceeeeleeebration!
    STOP IT!!!


    3760 BC:

    We've discovered Fishing, my little shield!
    Groovy.
    I highly recommend we research Polytheism. After all, since I preceded you on the throne, and your father, bless him, is only a noble, not a royal... founding a religion would help legitimize your rule.
    I follow your logic. But... nobody founds Hinduism if Polytheism isn't the first tech you research. I mean, it happens from time to time, but it's a long shot.
    What a smart little boy I have! Yes, that's why I'm not even suggesting Meditation, child. Odds are, someone's almost done discovering it. But even if we don't get Hinduism, which I'll admit is likely, we can still vie for Judaism afterwards. Now that we have both Fishing and Bronze Working, there are no other pressing technologies we absolutely need to acquire immediately.
    Alright. Sold.
     
  16. Arlborn

    Arlborn Legendary Noob

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2006
    Messages:
    1,939
    Wow, he now have pictures of expressions!

    I can't wait! :D
     
  17. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    3720 BC:

    Buddhism has been founded in a distant land.
    Is it an evil land?
    Logic says it is so.
    Well, so be it. Buddhism has been founded in a Distant Land of Evil.
    Oh. By the way, Sun Zero Bird, our warrior, has slain a pack of wolves.
    Yippee.


    3560 BC:

    Sun Zero Bird has stumbled upon another goody hut, young Ahau!



    Whaddaweegit? Whaddaweegit?
    42 gold.
    Uh. Well... they can't all be winners.


    3400 BC:



    Oh! I'm so proud of my little boy!
    HOODY HOO!! Totally unexpected!
    Shall we convert to Hinduism?
    Hinduism? No. No no... we just founded Cosmology!
    But it says...
    I SAID WE FOUNDED COSMOLOGY!
    So shall we convert to Cosmology, then?
    Not yet.
     
  18. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    Unfortunately, son, there's no Bronze ore anywhere in the area. May I suggest we take this opportunity to research Hunting? That way, we can at least train our Holkans, and eventually Archers as well.
    Yeah, sure. Sounds good to me.


    3320 BC:

    Sun Zero Bird has slain a lion pride!
    Whatever, dad.


    3280 BC:

    Hunting now holds no secrets to our people.
    On to Archery...
    And Sun Zero Bird has slain a pack of panthers.
    Right. Look, no offense or anything, dad, but unless a Bear eats some of our troops, I don't care about fights with animals.
    But all those fights earned Sun Zero Bird a Medic promotion!
    Sweet!


    3160 BC:



    The great Native American people welcome you, Pacal II.
    Yeah. I'm Pacal II, Ahau of the glorious Mayan people.
    Would it be politically correct to offer you a peace-pipe? I guess I should rather ask if you are of legal age...
    Legal age for what, I'm frikkin' immortal!
    And my headdress has more feathers than yours.
    Well that's just my casual headdress, see? The ceremonial one is, like, way bigger, dude. Besides, it's not the size that counts, it's what you do with it.
    Are you going to do peace with it?
    Yeah. Sure. Why not? See you 'round!
     
  19. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    3120 BC:

    We have discovered Archery.
    Great news!
    What shall we research next?
    I don't know. Randomly pick something for me.
    Let's see... and the winner is: Sailing.
    Hm. Yeah. Maybe the coastal trade routes'll help or something.


    2840 BC:

    We've disc-
    Sure, mom. What next?
    Well, I suppose we'll be planning for our next cities, soon. And such plans begin with knowledge of the Wheel.
    Sold. We -



    May the heavens rain down blessings upon you, Pacal II! I am Mehmed II, wise and benevolent ruler of the Ottoman Empire!
    Well met. I'm Pacal II, most groovy Ahau of the Maya.
    Feel free to begin showering me with tribute at your convenience.
    And please note that the date of my convenience is: never.
    You're a funny little man, aren't you!
    I assume that was a rhetorical question.
    I suppose we may as well have peace.
    Indeed. See you 'round!
     
  20. Flouzemaker

    Flouzemaker Prince

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Messages:
    341
    2680 BC:

    We've discovered the Wheel.
    You know, son. It occurs to me that the Work Boats you're building in Lakam Ha are taking some time to train, here. It'd go a lot faster if we adopted slavery and whipped up production a little.
    But that's inhumane!
    When a problem comes along...
    You must whip it!
    Before the cream sits out too long...
    You must whip it!
    When somethings going wrong...
    You must whip it!

    Now whip it! Into shape... Shape it up... Get straight... Go forwards... Move ahead...
    STOP THAT! We're not adopting Slavery. Not yet, anyways.
    Can we at least research Meditation so we can build Monasteries and spread Cosmology?
    Yeah. I guess we can do that...
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page