Hey!
Hey You!
What're you doing, browsing Civfanatics?! Don't you know there's a war on!?
"Are we winning?" What the @#($ kind of question is that? Of course we are! But we need your help to keep up the fight! "What can I do to help?" Well, you can start by buying a good ol' fashioned All-Egyptian style burger at Copaczin's Cheeseburger Land- That's what! Proceeds go right to the front lines!
You can also help by finding creative and cost-effective solutions to your problems. Take the city of Asturias, on Futuba Island. They needed a fresh water source, see? But did they cry like babies and ask for shipments from the mainland? OF COURSE NOT! We're Egyptian! So, they built a bridge all the way from Futuba to Goodsprings, and mined the water right out of the ground!
So, think you can handle that, pal? You bet ur' @#$ you can! "So what have our boys been up to", you ask? Well....
First thing's first. That wannabe princess Isabella demanded we stop being Jewish. Can ya believe that? Some nerve!
"What'd we do about it?" I'm glad you asked! We did what anyone would do in that situation. We politely declined...
...and blew her up.
Ain't it just grand be'n Egyptian?
That's One enemy down! But remember, we got 2 more to go! Well we celebrate our victory over the Spanish, our high command is drawing up plans to attack the Celts and Arabians!
And let's not forget our allies, the Mali. They've been fight'n their own war with those schmucks down south. Those Arabians are going up against Modern Armors with infantry!
"What about the Fallout?" What kind of question is that? There's almost no evidence to suggest nuh-cue-lar bombs leave any lasting effects. What could Possibly go wrong?
Eh, forget that! Just remember kiddo- we're gonna win this war! How? Just ask Private Ramses!