True(!) story. How can anyone be so stupid?

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carlosMM

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May 14, 2003
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Ok, this has been festering in me for a while, today another instance of outstanding studipity happened and now I'll make a thread on them - a sort of rant for me and funny read for all others. Feel free to add your examples, please - though mine can make me cry they are still funny, and I need a laugh now.


@mods: maybe this could also go into H&J, I am not really sure. Feel free to move it.


TRUE STORIES ONLY, PLEASE



'Humans are not animals'

At the busstop I met a women with a child of maybe 6 years. 'Mom, are humans also animals?' I heard the little girl ask.
'No, dear, not at all! You see, Carla has a little rabbit, you know? And it has four legs. All animals have four legs, us humans have two legs and two arms only, so we are not animals.'

:eek:



Student replies in exams

I asked: 'Please name two groups of marine reptiles'

Answers:
- Sharks and Lissamphibia
- Cartilaginous fish and turtles' (I gave full points for turtle, though I would loe to see what happenes if I throw his Testudo hermanni into the sea)
- Ichtyostega and crocodiles'
(wonderfull, thrice wrong in one go: Ichtyostega is NOT a group, NOT marine, and NOT a reptile....)



More student replies
I asked: 'Please name three differences between Archosauria and Mammalia'

Answers:
- Mammals do not lay eggs and they suckle them. Archosaurs do lay eggs and do not suckle them. (whom, the eggs????)
- Archosaurs (birds, dinosaurs, crocodiles) have a sprawling gait and are ecthoderms (double :ouch: - he must have meant ectotherms, which is also obviously false; it means 'cold blooded')



Sunsets

Kid asks Dad in train: 'Why is it summer ehre when aunt Linda has winter in Australia?'
Dad: 'Well, you see, that is because in summer, the sun stand closer to the noth pole. Same as when it is evening here and morning in the southern hemisphere.


:lol:



Moons

I was asked: 'Can you see the moon in Germany?'

I answered: 'Yes, both of them' :lol:



And finally, the one that freaked me out today:

Pregnancy and AIDS

On the radio: 'If I am pregnant, then I cannot get AIDS, right?'


:eek: :cry:
 
carlosMM said:
'Humans are not animals'

At the busstop I met a women with a child of maybe 6 years. 'Mom, are humans also animals?' I heard the little girl ask.
'No, dear, not at all! You see, Carla has a little rabbit, you know? And it has four legs. All animals have four legs, us humans have two legs and two arms only, so we are not animals.'

:eek:
Click to expand...
I'll remember this the next time a vegan asks me not to eat chicken. Or fish, I suppose.


On the subject of biological stupidity, Hoodwinked Hovind recently claimed that only organisms with red blood are alive. The funny part is that human embryos don't have blood, red or otherwise, until they're a few weeks old, so he's indirectly endorsing abortion.

(Of course, it's not entirely safe to assume that Hovind believes a word he says, but as we've seen on this very forum there are people who take would believe him unquestioningly if he said 2+2=1485783.)

Oh, and a woman calling hersef "Carico" recently claimed that the only evidence for Homo sapiens is a fragmentary cranium. Methinks the only incomplete skull around is Carico's own ...


And a couple favourites concering the Moon - time and time again I run into people who believe that the far side of the Moon is always dark and/or that the Moon is never visible during the day. I mean, WTH?!? A second of thought should dispel the former idea, and a pair of eyes the later.
 
:lol:


red blood - that's a good one! :lol:


the 'Porsche' one:

'Where you from?'
'Germany'
'Ah, Germany, they don't know ****, They don't make proper cars!'
'Well, what's a proepr car in YOUR opinion?'
'I have a 911 Porsch'
'Yeah, and what else is OK?'
'Mercedes, Audi, Volkswagen....'
'And where are they from?'
'Mexiko!'


:rotfl:

edit: P.S.: I took great delight in pointing out the Baden-Württemberg state emblem on the hood of his Porsche (which, btw, does not have a silent 'e'.....)
 
'Humans are not animals'

At the busstop I met a women with a child of maybe 6 years. 'Mom, are humans also animals?' I heard the little girl ask.
'No, dear, not at all! You see, Carla has a little rabbit, you know? And it has four legs. All animals have four legs, us humans have two legs and two arms only, so we are not animals.'
Click to expand...
Two legs good, four legs bad.
 
carlosMM said:
And what are birds? Aliens?
Click to expand...
He's making a reference to Animal Farm, in which for political reasons is decided that wings qualify as "legs", but arms don't.

Luckily, there were no non-human simians on the farm.
 
carlosMM said:
And what are birds? Aliens?
Click to expand...
It's from Animal Farm, a satire about the USSR. Only in the book, it was "four legs good, two legs bad". Here is how they got around this difficulty in the book.

Animal Farm said:
After much thought Snowball declared that the Seven Commandments could in effect be reduced to a single maxim, namely: "Four legs good, two legs bad." This, he said, contained the essential principle of Animalism. Whoever had thoroughly grasped it would be safe from human influences. The birds at first objected, since it seemed to them that they also had two legs, but Snowball proved to them that this was not so.

"A bird's wing, comrades," he said, "is an organ of propulsion and not of manipulation. It should therefore be regarded as a leg. The distinguishing mark of man is the hand, the instrument with which he does all his mischief."

The birds did not understand Snowball's long words, but they accepted his explanation, and all the humbler animals set to work to learn the new maxim by heart. FOUR LEGS GOOD, TWO LEGS BAD, was inscribed on the end wall of the barn, above the Seven Commandments and in bigger letters When they had once got it by heart, the sheep developed a great liking for this maxim, and often as they lay in the field they would all start bleating "Four legs good, two legs bad! Four legs good, two legs bad!" and keep it up for hours on end, never growing tired of it.
Click to expand...
 
Oh, and no the subject of inconceivable stupidity, this gem was just submitted to www.fstdt.com:

"(Embryos are "human", but they're not PEOPLE. How can you consider it to be a person when it doesn't have a brain?)

When exactly do you think the pregnant woman swallows that magical vitamin that adds the brain, since you mystifyingly believe it's not in the first cell?"
Click to expand...

link
 
a few weeks ago a bunch of teenage guys were discussing sex on the train...one of them was concerned with condoms, then the other told him that it's not necessary since she can't get pregnant unless you have sex while she's bleeding :lol:

pretty scary actually :ack:
 
Nothing that horrible in biological stupidity, I don't even understand the questions really :p. Then again, my total knowledge of biology, including zoology and botanics, amounts to approximately zero. I guess that doesn't make it right to call me stupid, but you could certainly call me ignorant in the area.
 
They made a (scaled) statue of Liberty holding a cruifix instead of a torch. It was one of those Christain SUPER ministries errected:

One father was driving hes kids past it and he heard the kids comments:
kid1: it just dosnt look right Statue of Liberty should have a torch to shine a light
Kid2: thinks a while .... Well she can use the cross (cruifix) on Vampires.

me = LOL
 
Some goober actually believes that September 11th and Saddam Hussein are inextricably linked! Man, what an idiot.

Slightly less depressing example: An exgirlfriend of mine, whom I had realized was dumb, watched Tron with me. Yes, I think you know what question she asked me (I'm a programmer). She asked me, "do you think it's really like that in computers?" (She wasn't blonde, if that's what you're thinking. She was Chinese with black hair.)
 
Solver said:
Nothing that horrible in biological stupidity, I don't even understand the questions really :p. Then again, my total knowledge of biology, including zoology and botanics, amounts to approximately zero. I guess that doesn't make it right to call me stupid, but you could certainly call me ignorant in the area.
Click to expand...

yup, you are ignorant. But then, you are not a paleontology student, and haven't been TAUGHT the answers to those questions jsut two and three weeks before ;) Stupid is only when you MUST know it and SHOULD know it and CAN know it - and are simply thick as a brick :lol:
 
Red Stranger said:
If your students reply with stupid answers, doesn't that just mean you're a bad teacher?
Click to expand...

It could indeed.

The problem is that my boss fell sick, so I had to jump in - 24h warning. So I couldn't really give a deep and intensive course, so it was basically learning things by heart - a quick overview over vertebrate evolution. But, the students seemed to think (several told me) that as they do not plan to specialize in paleontology, the mandatory course in paleo should not contain things that are of no use in e.g. oil exploration. One guy dared to tell me that he thought it was unnecessary to learn how to draw to scientific standards - he wants to study sedimentology. When I asked him what he was going to do about drawing profiles of outcrops he told me he'd just snap a pic. Well, I can tell you that on a pic you cannot determine theg rian size or intra-bed sorting of sand or silt. What a lazy moron!

Well, sorry, but here's what a mandatory course is for: give the basics everyone must have heard, to keep them from becoming totally specialized ivory tower idiots.


So the problem rests with the student's attitude - after all, many enjoyed the course, asked a lot of questions, and had perfect grades!
 
hell, and even the best teacher would constantly have a few students in his class that are just way too thick to be reached....
 
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