What Happens Next?

[Daftpanzer]

...undead kittens. They still looked kinda cute. They just smelt a bit, and killed people sometimes.

 

[Stylesrj]

But then Chuck Norris came along. He looked badly wounded. There was only one person who could do that to him: Druss the Legend!

 

[D0NIMATRIX]

He then proceeded to die and have his memory fade away, and never be mentioned again(hint, hint), making the Soviets...

 

[SS-18 ICBM]

restore normalcy with their Quantum Integrator.

 

[Daftpanzer]

Except some undead kittens were still left on Earth. They then did something amazing that didn't involve Chuck Norris in any way, which was...

 

[Stylesrj]

...calling in Druss the Legend! Druss kicked more ass than anyone else and won! He then stared at the Earth, which caused the solar system to explode. Druss then...

 

[Endwar 005]

Commited suicide. This caused a new solar system to be created, and the sentients of this one were called...

 

[D0NIMATRIX]

Lannistumatons! They proceeded to...

 

[Stylesrj]

Ascend to Transcendence... but first they needed Voice of Planet. The Manifold Caretakers were already underway with their Subspace Generators...

 

[Daftpanzer]

Then a huge giant Pikachu swallowed the whole universe. President Bush made an emergancy statement on TV:

"My fellow citizens...

 

[Terrance888]

I was your president but am swallowed by...

 

[Stylesrj]

A giant death robot with a purple monkey dishwasher!

This made Perfection very angry. He...

 

[Daftpanzer]

... counted to ten, and felt much better. In fact, he connected with his higher spiritual self, and ascended to transcendence, and became a spiritual leader to all of humanity.

 

[Stuck in Pi]

The CFC community sighed in relief.

 

[Stylesrj]

Angels sang out in immaculate chorus. Down from the heavens, descended King Leonidas.
Who delivered a kick, which could shatter bones.
Into the chest...
Of a Persian Messenger...
Who fell over into a well...
writhing in pain...
As Leonidas yelled...
"This... is... SPAAARTA!!"

Then...

 

[SS-18 ICBM]

Jesus kicked Leonidas into a bottomless well.

 

[Daftpanzer]

The enraged Spartans attacked Jesus. An epic slow-motion fight scene now took place...

 

[Terrance888]

In which Jesus got his penis shoot off, he was proclaimed as the Holy Daughter, disdraught christians...

 

[Stylesrj]

danced to the beat and clawed at their eyes. Prosperity was had by all the colonies. Except the ones who are dead.
But there's no sense crying over every mistake, you just keep on trying until you run out of...

 

[D'Artagnan59]

Beer. Leonidas rose from the bottomless well, and Jesus crucified himself so God could bring him back to life with a penis.