It has been some time since i had a nightmare, but this one seemed to be particularly important.
-The actual nightmare-
I do not recall the beginning, and very few parts of the middle of the dream. But i remember quite vividly its end, and a crucial part before it.
In the end there was a trial of a serial killer. The police were certain they had caught the right person, and there seemed to be no question of his guilt. In fact they were so certain that at the scene of the arrest many of the policemen pressed their pistols onto the head of the alleged serial killer, fighting their urge to just give an end to his life there and then. Immediately before that he had tried to escape, by climbing onto a barb-wire fence, but the whole attempt seemed to be pointless, he seemed to have been attempting to commit suicide, if anything.
The trial was very tense. Relatives and friends of the victims paraded in front of the accused man, in a manner that it is not common practice in modern societies. They were allowed to show pictures of the ones killed, and almost press them to the accused person's face. The accused person was allowed, in turn, to carry a toy- gun and wave it in alarm towards those people to signal that he cannot take it anymore, at which point the lawyers or other aids would come to remove the crowd from in front of him.
Of course i was that man accused of several murders. At this point i was trying to exit the dream without reaching the inevitable end- being executed or lynched it seemed would have been the outcome of the trial. But still i was not entirely one with the accused person. I was on the one hand him, but on the other hand merely an observer, like a writer of his story. This became very evident in one scene:
At some point some of the lawyers were favorable towards allowing the accused person to speak about his life, in an attempt to gain sympathy that he so desperately needed with the crowd. But this was not communicated to him. Or rather the lawyers, mixed with some relatives of the dead, came to him and started saying vaguely that he can choose a new line of defense, but then when he asked what he should do, a relative of one killed came forward and proposed that he should lie about everything. This immediately made the accused very irritated. After the crowd left him he stood up and went towards the lawyers to shout to them that they were nobodies and equal to nothing. It was clear that he was now of the view that the court wanted him to lie, mocking him about his rights to speak the truth about his life.
Finally his irritation led to him capturing one of the lawyers- or a relative of someone killed- and tried to cut through her neck with a sharp object. This attempt finally ended with him being executed in front of the crowd.
Now that was the end of the dream, and a scene before that end (the capture of the accused). The only other scene i remember in detail was one of the murders. In it a very small, almost embryonic child, was caught and thrown down from the balcony. This was done both due to hostility towards that child, and the sense that it amounted to nothing, and also so as to frighten the child's brothers, who were witnesses to the scene. The killer was of their age too, an elementary schooler.
-Attempts at an explanation-
Some elements of the dream seem to lead towards a certain explanation of it. Mostly that the final victim was an embryo of some sorts. In psychology there is argued- and documented- that very young, pre-school children, can come to imagine killing their unborn siblings, when their mother is pregnant.
Another possible explanation of the embyonic being is that it was at least in part a reference to a kitten i had once killed at that age, although i dont remember that episode almost at all. But if i did kill it then it is certain that i caused it to fall down from the balcony. Naturally the balcony, and also the room of the accused, were my own, in my old house.
Anyway i could write more, but already this post has become huge... I would be interested in reading what you make of the nightmare