Chuck Norris Random Facts

[killerorange_27]

If Chuck Norris had a TV show, it would be called "Walker, Texas Ranger"

 

[Abaddon]

even im bored of him!

 

[killerorange_27]

Wow... Even you're bored of him? Then he must be boring, since you obviously don't bore easily...

I wish I could express sarcasm in text... you tool...

 

[Abaddon]

if you had been here longer- you would realise i was taking the piss out of myself.

 

[killerorange_27]

And possibly if I had been here longer I would know what "taking the piss out of myself" means. Are you literallly extracting urine from you body or what?

edit: BTW - "declares" is spelled D-E-C-L-A-R-E-S.

 

[Abaddon]

its called sarcasm buddy

 

[killerorange_27]

Like I said before, it would be useful to somehow express sarcasm in text.
I think I burned my tongue on pizza.

 

[SoCalian]

what did that last part have to do with anything?

Chuck Norris doesn't burn his toung on pizza, he burns pizza with his tounge.

 

[killerorange_27]

It had nothing to do with anything, but I burned it yesterday and today it hurts. It was DiGiorno pizza.

4 years ago on Thanksgiving, Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey. Chuck went outside, found a live turkey, and ate it whole. He then ripped open his stomach and pulled the turkey out, cooked and with potatoes and cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he did it, he said, "Don't question Chuck Norris"

 

[killerorange_27]

If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you're about to die.

 

[Abaddon]

that im with.. perhaps if i had italicised the "my" in the first post...

 

[Lord Gideon]

There are no earthquakes. Just Chuck Norris doing push-ups on the other side of the world.

 

[puglover]

Every Valentines Day, Chuck Norris gives his wife the still-beating heart of one of his enemies. Being very romantic, Chuck Norris thinks every day should be Valentines Day.

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

When he was a teenager, CHuck Norris had sex with an entire convent of nuns tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later, those nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only team ever to be undefeated in professional footbal history

CHuck Norris is the only man who can acutally email you a roundhouse kick

Chuck Norris is the only human to ever display the Hiesenberg Uncertainty Principle: you can never be sure both when and how fast he will roundhouse kick you in the face

If A Chuck Norris roundhouse kick were to be tapped, it coudl power Australia for 44 minutes.

Chuck Norris CAN believe its not butter

 

[GoldEagle]

Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

 

[WildWeazel]

Chuck Norris can play just 1 turn of Civ.

btw goldeagle, I love the sig! (and the location)