Doughnuts

[HotDog Fish]

In my opinion, I've been a doughnut in my past lives at least twice! All of you are crazy though! I believe the pure, sweet, simple yet so deep, awe inspiring and humble yet utterly powerful in it's beauty...I am talking about of course, the Honey Glazed Doughnut

 

[Perfection]

I HAD A REVELATION

We've got it all wrong it can't be a Jelly Donut because their un"hole"y. SPREAD THE ENLIGHTMENT OF NEO-DONUTISM!!!

 

[HotDog Fish]

You are correct! Jelly doughnuts haver no holes! They are as much a doughnut as Carrot Top is funny

 

[puglover]

Oh brother! This thread is weird. Why did I start it?

 

[Sultan Bhargash]

Originally posted by Perfection
I HAD A REVELATION

We've got it all wrong it can't be a Jelly Donut because their un"hole"y. SPREAD THE ENLIGHTMENT OF NEO-DONUTISM!!!

This Neo donutism sounds very suspect (first because you continue to leave out the important "silent holy syllable" ugh), second because, suppose you were right and it "can't be a jelly donut" (and I risk my soul to say that, may TGJD have mercy on me). What is it then? You offer no alternative savior. You don't expect us to start worshipping "donuts" [sic] en masse do you?

Here is where I will surprise you and beat you to the punch.

The Neo Doughnut is covered in chocolate cream on one side only, with a radius of 7 billion km. It derives its power to heal us ONLY from its ability to communicate with the Great Jelly Doughnut. 'Nuff said.

 

[Immortal]

Sultan, tell me an unconverted person: Whats on the other side?

*Waits impatiently*

 

[Sultan Bhargash]

Immortal, spada di giustizia, Doughnut is what is on the other side. Pure, unsullied doughnut.

 

[Perfection]

No it must be a chocolate coated donut with sprinkles

The Chocolate is the space we live in and the sprinkles are the stars around us we right now are sitting on the backl of the magnificent great chocolate donut.

 

[Immortal]

perfection: What about the hole in the middle? the axis of rotation!!! Think of the axis of rotation!! There must be something in the middle! And gravity!!

 

[Perfection]

The middle is a forbiddin zone in which no mortal can cross

 

[Sultan Bhargash]

That's where you're wrong, Perfection.

Wrong about so much. (Sprinkles !). The hold in the middle is where the whole universe is, not on the body of the doughnut. The doughnut surrounds us, penetrates us, binds the galaxy together.

 

[Perfection]

How dare you challange the words of the Great Donut, He shall personally banish you to the hottest and nastiest part the vat of burnt coffee

 

[Switch625]

Yeast doughnut. Maple glazed. Mana from the gods.

 

[Archbob]

No, Raspberry Jelly has seeds in it which makes it unpure, the strawberry Jelly usually does not, it is completely pure. Grape Jelly is too dark and has fallen from the true path, there the only one true mighty doughnut is the strawberry doughnut god, the others are all trying to decieve you, do not listen to them.

 

[The Troquelet]

Aside from wanting to yell "Psychiatrist Bonanza!" if you are discussing which is the purest and simplest donut it is undoubtedly the Sugar Doughnut.

 

[Pongui]

I'm amazed none of you acknowledge the Big Bag. Belief in the Big Bag is compatible with belief in a one doughnut, and I'll explain why: In the beginning there was a bag, which contained all possible doughnuts. Since that inscrutable moment, the papers of the bag have been unraveling, and, doughnuts are disappearing. It is incredible that where there was something, there could be a nothing, but this has been proven beyond doubt, time and again. We are now living in the final moments of the penultimate doughnut. When it is gone, there will be a doughnut singularity. To some, this one remaining doughnut is forever untouchable. For others, this one doughnut is the paradise they've been yearning for. I personally believe that on that final day of reckoning good manners will prevail and hold us in it's purgatory trance; time will stand still and we'll dare not seize the doughnut, forever.

 

[Switch625]

Actually, we will discover that the ultimate doughnut has gone stale, and nobody will want it.

 

[Rodgers]

The best non-filled donut are the ones on sale at English seaside resorts - they make them on the spot and chuck them in a paper bag with sugar in. Revolting but strangly enjoyable (sort of like the dessert version of the kebab)

 

[Ancient Grudge]

Perfection you are a breakway from the church of the Doughnut, your new church the church of the donut is disgraceful you are a blasphemer . Be gone from this discussion of your former religion .

I do not fear your vat of burnt coffee because i have the vat of burnt tea on my side

 

[Sultan Bhargash]

@Switch- yeast doughnut? Yeast?

@Sean Lindstrom- a very interesting scientific explanation, and by far the most dangerous of the competing theories we have heard. Only one problem. There is absolutely no proof.

@Rodgers- sounds an awful lot like funnel cake. Mmmmm, funnel cake....