Girl Problems? Ask

[punkbass2000]

How do you know if a girl is interested in you?

Do something extremely poorly. If she compliments it anyway, that's a sure winner. For example, I am terrible singer. When a girl tells me she likes my voice, she's obviously lying. Or, for another, last week I went to a Hallowe'en party straight from work and had no costume. This one girl decided to put this ridiculous wig on me (some weird flashy gold thing) and randomly paint my face. Worst costume ever. Nonetheless, I was complimented on my costume at bars and such later by other girls. Again, they were clearly lying.

 

[Xanikk999]

Do something extremely poorly. If she compliments it anyway, that's a sure winner. For example, I am terrible singer. When a girl tells me she likes my voice, she's obviously lying. Or, for another, last week I went to a Hallowe'en party straight from work and had no costume. This one girl decided to put this ridiculous wig on me (some weird flashy gold thing) and randomly paint my face. Worst costume ever. Nonetheless, I was complimented on my costume at bars and such later by other girls. Again, they were clearly lying.

Yeah ive had that before.. Well only once but i didnt act on it.

 

[Xanikk999]

In fact maybe i should check up on my first (and only) girlfriend now that i have more experience. She was easy.

Im more confident now.

 

[CartesianFart]

How to tell if a girl likes you....

Give her some booze.some chick dig that.

Give her some weed..some chick dig that.

Give her some coke...some chick dig that.

Give her some crystal....some chick dig that.

Some chicks are ignorant and want someone to take care of her.All you have to have is a place of your own and provide her security and companionship.

Some chicks wants a friendship and a mutual partner to grow financially and persue some hobbies.

Some chicks just want to get laid,so just give her what she want.No strings-attach.

 

[Eran of Arcadia]

I only date within my religion, and in fact there is a unique LDS dating culture, I am not sure how similar it is to dating in general. My question is this. I have heard that, within my church, a few girls will get asked out a lot by a lot of different guys (there is a lot of casual dating), while there are a lot of girls who get asked out a lot less frequently, even though they are just as cool, and just as attractive, as the girls who get asked out alot. So, is this common with dating in general, and more importantly, how do I identify the girls who don't get asked out as much?

 

[Masquerouge]

and more importantly, how do I identify the girls who don't get asked out as much?

Probably by asking the guys. You'll soon see a pattern emerge pointing to which girls are more in demand, STS.

 

[Civrules]

I only date within my religion, and in fact there is a unique LDS dating culture, I am not sure how similar it is to dating in general. My question is this. I have heard that, within my church, a few girls will get asked out a lot by a lot of different guys (there is a lot of casual dating), while there are a lot of girls who get asked out a lot less frequently, even though they are just as cool, and just as attractive, as the girls who get asked out alot. So, is this common with dating in general, and more importantly, how do I identify the girls who don't get asked out as much?

Yeah but why does it matter if they get asked out a lot or not?
You're better than the competition. So enjoy it.

 

[Junglecutter]

Yeah but why does it matter if they get asked out a lot or not?
You're better than the competition. So enjoy it.

I love having competition for a single girl...gets very interesting w/ backstabs and the such...you will learn to trust no one

 

[Eran of Arcadia]

First of all, objectively speaking, I am not better than the competition. Second of all, there is less drama with girls who aren't asked out as much. Third, I am more likely to be more attracted the the sort of girl who isn't asked out as much. Simple as that.

 

[Civrules]

You'd like to be better than the competition and it isn't as hard as it seems.
Mostly because the competition is the 90+% of the guys who are perceived to be the "players," but in reality they literally try too hard. (Though they don't fall under the "nice guy" category either.) Things get a lot easier when you realize that all along you have been overestimating the competition.

Drama is unavoidable. Just because the girl isn't asked out as much doesn't mean you'll have less drama (I don't think there's any correlation anyway). Drama comes from within the person and their desires, and when they are different from your own. You wouldn't know who'd cause the drama because you'd have to know the person pretty well.

Your third point is fair enough. Most guys are attracted more to girls who haven't gone around as much... Which is the opposite of how women look at guys.
The more we are with girls the more they are attracted to us (that's the social proof thing).

 

[Sophie 378]

A new question - and from a girl. How do I turn a guy down? Emotional baggage attached.

Spoiler the history :

I met this guy a couple of years ago. I'd just had a letter published in the New Scientist, and I was absolutely bursting with joy. Maybe I was looking very smily and flirty or something, but he was working the till at Tesco when I was buying stuff; he said I looked great, and I said thanks and forgot him. Ten minutes later, I was waiting for my bus home - and he came running after me to ask me out. He was supposed to be on duty in the shop - maybe he called it a tea break or something - but he ran about four hundred yards (or maybe more; he might have been round all the other seven stops hunting for me) to ask for my phone number. The bus was arriving just as he did, so I didn't really have time to think about what to do; so I scribbled my email address down on a scrap of paper and gave it to him.

I'm not entirely sure why I did that, or even if it was the right decision. I didn't fancy him, but I didn't dislike him. It's very flattering to be chased that way, but it was more surprising and even a bit alarming than pleasing. I feel all confused about him.

Anyway, after a few emails and phone calls back and forth, where he kept saying how great I was and I tried to put him off gently, we agreed to meet up. I thought of a local park, where we could just walk around together and talk, in private but public so that he wouldn't come on too strongly. So, we met up, we walked, we talked. He kissed me - I didn't know what to do, I just sort of turned away. We strolled around the park for a few hours, looking at the trees and flowers and ducks, and when it rained we went and sat in the cafe and talked more. He kept grabbing my hand to hold, and putting his arm around me. I didn't actively enjoy it - it made me nervous and tense - but I didn't want to hurt him by pushing him off.

I told him that I'd never had a boyfriend before, and I didn't know if I wanted one. I said that I didn't mind if he wanted to hold my hand, but I didn't seem to be developing any feelings for him - and if none did, then maybe it wasn't worth meeting again.

Eventually, I said I'd better be getting home, as I had exams quite soon and I needed to do a lot of work for them. He asked if he could walk with me to my house, and since I didn't know what to do, I said ok.

He kissed me a couple more times, and then, since I was rather obviously not inviting him in, he left. He emailed me a couple of days later, and since I still didn't know what to do, I didn't reply. I just left it. It got later and later, days and weeks, and I still hadn't replied ... I hoped he'd take that as a no. I felt more relief than anything else that he was out of the picture.

-----

Anyway, that's the history ... I hadn't seen him for a year and a half, but then I met him again in Tesco. I would rather have just said hi and carried on with my shopping, but he walked around with me talking for about five minutes. I didn't really know what to say. He asked me out again ... I said I didn't know, I'm really busy this year, but I gave him my mobile number. Then he kissed me. In the cheese aisle, when I was still thinking about my shopping list and trying to remember bus timetables. He said he'd text me, and he wants to date.

Now what do I do? I don't really want to date him, or at least I don't think I do. I don't fancy him, ditto. On the other hand, I don't dislike him. When I think about dating him, I just feel nervous and anxious. Not good. When I think about dating somebody generic, I feel nervous but good. I'm fairly sure I should just tell him please don't try to catch me, I'm not interested. It feels so mean, though. He seems so smitten with me. Has he been pining for 18 months? Or what? Should I try to make excuses, like I'm too busy? Or semi-lying excuses, like I'm asexual, I'm interested in someone else? Should I just completely ignore him? Should I give him another date? It would probably be for the best if I told him straight - I'm not interested, don't waste your time. I don't know if I can, though. If he texts me, maybe I could text him back with that. I don't know what to do ....

 

[Rossiya]

How do you know if a girl is interested in you?

You don't, you just always assume she does.

 

[punkbass2000]

A new question - and from a girl. How do I turn a guy down? Emotional baggage attached.

Spoiler the history :

I met this guy a couple of years ago. I'd just had a letter published in the New Scientist, and I was absolutely bursting with joy. Maybe I was looking very smily and flirty or something, but he was working the till at Tesco when I was buying stuff; he said I looked great, and I said thanks and forgot him. Ten minutes later, I was waiting for my bus home - and he came running after me to ask me out. He was supposed to be on duty in the shop - maybe he called it a tea break or something - but he ran about four hundred yards (or maybe more; he might have been round all the other seven stops hunting for me) to ask for my phone number. The bus was arriving just as he did, so I didn't really have time to think about what to do; so I scribbled my email address down on a scrap of paper and gave it to him.

I'm not entirely sure why I did that, or even if it was the right decision. I didn't fancy him, but I didn't dislike him. It's very flattering to be chased that way, but it was more surprising and even a bit alarming than pleasing. I feel all confused about him.

Anyway, after a few emails and phone calls back and forth, where he kept saying how great I was and I tried to put him off gently, we agreed to meet up. I thought of a local park, where we could just walk around together and talk, in private but public so that he wouldn't come on too strongly. So, we met up, we walked, we talked. He kissed me - I didn't know what to do, I just sort of turned away. We strolled around the park for a few hours, looking at the trees and flowers and ducks, and when it rained we went and sat in the cafe and talked more. He kept grabbing my hand to hold, and putting his arm around me. I didn't actively enjoy it - it made me nervous and tense - but I didn't want to hurt him by pushing him off.

I told him that I'd never had a boyfriend before, and I didn't know if I wanted one. I said that I didn't mind if he wanted to hold my hand, but I didn't seem to be developing any feelings for him - and if none did, then maybe it wasn't worth meeting again.

Eventually, I said I'd better be getting home, as I had exams quite soon and I needed to do a lot of work for them. He asked if he could walk with me to my house, and since I didn't know what to do, I said ok.

He kissed me a couple more times, and then, since I was rather obviously not inviting him in, he left. He emailed me a couple of days later, and since I still didn't know what to do, I didn't reply. I just left it. It got later and later, days and weeks, and I still hadn't replied ... I hoped he'd take that as a no. I felt more relief than anything else that he was out of the picture.

-----

Anyway, that's the history ... I hadn't seen him for a year and a half, but then I met him again in Tesco. I would rather have just said hi and carried on with my shopping, but he walked around with me talking for about five minutes. I didn't really know what to say. He asked me out again ... I said I didn't know, I'm really busy this year, but I gave him my mobile number. Then he kissed me. In the cheese aisle, when I was still thinking about my shopping list and trying to remember bus timetables. He said he'd text me, and he wants to date.

Now what do I do? I don't really want to date him, or at least I don't think I do. I don't fancy him, ditto. On the other hand, I don't dislike him. When I think about dating him, I just feel nervous and anxious. Not good. When I think about dating somebody generic, I feel nervous but good. I'm fairly sure I should just tell him please don't try to catch me, I'm not interested. It feels so mean, though. He seems so smitten with me. Has he been pining for 18 months? Or what? Should I try to make excuses, like I'm too busy? Or semi-lying excuses, like I'm asexual, I'm interested in someone else? Should I just completely ignore him? Should I give him another date? It would probably be for the best if I told him straight - I'm not interested, don't waste your time. I don't know if I can, though. If he texts me, maybe I could text him back with that. I don't know what to do ....

I empathize. IMO, one of advantages of being a guy is that you generally don't have to turn people down directly. Unfortunately, you're not a guy () and you're going to have to tell him explicitly that you're not interested. You sound as though you're not very assertive, given that you've let him kiss you etc., but you're going to have to bite the bullet sooner or later. Unless you want to end up married to him for the next 50 years

 

[Leonel]

Good day! I do have a question about girls if I may ask.

Now we have a new employee at work and she's a pleasant young woman to talk to. Now otherwise I wouldn't suspect anything. However I've noticed very small things that may or may not be anything significant, such as her express wish to sit next to me during a company meeting or inserting smilies into her emails with me in cases in which other co-workers wouldn't put any smilies. However I could easily dismiss it as youthful exuberance as I believe she is still in university and merely enthusiastic. I'm not looking for any sort of relationship at this time but I figure it would fulfill some whimsical curiosity in me to know her true intentions.

 

[Masquerouge]

A new question - and from a girl. How do I turn a guy down? Emotional baggage attached.

Spoiler the history :

I met this guy a couple of years ago. I'd just had a letter published in the New Scientist, and I was absolutely bursting with joy. Maybe I was looking very smily and flirty or something, but he was working the till at Tesco when I was buying stuff; he said I looked great, and I said thanks and forgot him. Ten minutes later, I was waiting for my bus home - and he came running after me to ask me out. He was supposed to be on duty in the shop - maybe he called it a tea break or something - but he ran about four hundred yards (or maybe more; he might have been round all the other seven stops hunting for me) to ask for my phone number. The bus was arriving just as he did, so I didn't really have time to think about what to do; so I scribbled my email address down on a scrap of paper and gave it to him.

I'm not entirely sure why I did that, or even if it was the right decision. I didn't fancy him, but I didn't dislike him. It's very flattering to be chased that way, but it was more surprising and even a bit alarming than pleasing. I feel all confused about him.

Anyway, after a few emails and phone calls back and forth, where he kept saying how great I was and I tried to put him off gently, we agreed to meet up. I thought of a local park, where we could just walk around together and talk, in private but public so that he wouldn't come on too strongly. So, we met up, we walked, we talked. He kissed me - I didn't know what to do, I just sort of turned away. We strolled around the park for a few hours, looking at the trees and flowers and ducks, and when it rained we went and sat in the cafe and talked more. He kept grabbing my hand to hold, and putting his arm around me. I didn't actively enjoy it - it made me nervous and tense - but I didn't want to hurt him by pushing him off.

I told him that I'd never had a boyfriend before, and I didn't know if I wanted one. I said that I didn't mind if he wanted to hold my hand, but I didn't seem to be developing any feelings for him - and if none did, then maybe it wasn't worth meeting again.

Eventually, I said I'd better be getting home, as I had exams quite soon and I needed to do a lot of work for them. He asked if he could walk with me to my house, and since I didn't know what to do, I said ok.

He kissed me a couple more times, and then, since I was rather obviously not inviting him in, he left. He emailed me a couple of days later, and since I still didn't know what to do, I didn't reply. I just left it. It got later and later, days and weeks, and I still hadn't replied ... I hoped he'd take that as a no. I felt more relief than anything else that he was out of the picture.

-----

Anyway, that's the history ... I hadn't seen him for a year and a half, but then I met him again in Tesco. I would rather have just said hi and carried on with my shopping, but he walked around with me talking for about five minutes. I didn't really know what to say. He asked me out again ... I said I didn't know, I'm really busy this year, but I gave him my mobile number. Then he kissed me. In the cheese aisle, when I was still thinking about my shopping list and trying to remember bus timetables. He said he'd text me, and he wants to date.

Now what do I do? I don't really want to date him, or at least I don't think I do. I don't fancy him, ditto. On the other hand, I don't dislike him. When I think about dating him, I just feel nervous and anxious. Not good. When I think about dating somebody generic, I feel nervous but good. I'm fairly sure I should just tell him please don't try to catch me, I'm not interested. It feels so mean, though. He seems so smitten with me. Has he been pining for 18 months? Or what? Should I try to make excuses, like I'm too busy? Or semi-lying excuses, like I'm asexual, I'm interested in someone else? Should I just completely ignore him? Should I give him another date? It would probably be for the best if I told him straight - I'm not interested, don't waste your time. I don't know if I can, though. If he texts me, maybe I could text him back with that. I don't know what to do ....

Sophie.
This guy is emotionally blackmailing you, intentionally or not (I believe unintentionally), by abusing your kindness, your lack of experience, and your inability to say no. You HAVE to tell him no. It's all well and nice to be afraid to put him down or squash his feelings, but he's not particularly considerate of yours apparently, since even though you act rather passive he did not take the hint.
You should not be forced to date someone you do not like. Do you realize that's where you're going to?
If you have his phone number call him and tell him you don't want to date him. Or even text him, heck. But make sure to be absolute: do not leave any kind of room for hope. If that guy is smitten, he will use any door left slighlty ajar to persuade himself you do no actually mean what you say (I know, I've been that guy). I suggest you be as cold as you can be: you're not here to preserve his feelings, but to get out of a really awkward relationship that you do not particularly enjoy.

 

[Civrules]

A new question - and from a girl. How do I turn a guy down? Emotional baggage attached.

Spoiler the history :

I met this guy a couple of years ago. I'd just had a letter published in the New Scientist, and I was absolutely bursting with joy. Maybe I was looking very smily and flirty or something, but he was working the till at Tesco when I was buying stuff; he said I looked great, and I said thanks and forgot him. Ten minutes later, I was waiting for my bus home - and he came running after me to ask me out. He was supposed to be on duty in the shop - maybe he called it a tea break or something - but he ran about four hundred yards (or maybe more; he might have been round all the other seven stops hunting for me) to ask for my phone number. The bus was arriving just as he did, so I didn't really have time to think about what to do; so I scribbled my email address down on a scrap of paper and gave it to him.

I'm not entirely sure why I did that, or even if it was the right decision. I didn't fancy him, but I didn't dislike him. It's very flattering to be chased that way, but it was more surprising and even a bit alarming than pleasing. I feel all confused about him.

Anyway, after a few emails and phone calls back and forth, where he kept saying how great I was and I tried to put him off gently, we agreed to meet up. I thought of a local park, where we could just walk around together and talk, in private but public so that he wouldn't come on too strongly. So, we met up, we walked, we talked. He kissed me - I didn't know what to do, I just sort of turned away. We strolled around the park for a few hours, looking at the trees and flowers and ducks, and when it rained we went and sat in the cafe and talked more. He kept grabbing my hand to hold, and putting his arm around me. I didn't actively enjoy it - it made me nervous and tense - but I didn't want to hurt him by pushing him off.

I told him that I'd never had a boyfriend before, and I didn't know if I wanted one. I said that I didn't mind if he wanted to hold my hand, but I didn't seem to be developing any feelings for him - and if none did, then maybe it wasn't worth meeting again.

Eventually, I said I'd better be getting home, as I had exams quite soon and I needed to do a lot of work for them. He asked if he could walk with me to my house, and since I didn't know what to do, I said ok.

He kissed me a couple more times, and then, since I was rather obviously not inviting him in, he left. He emailed me a couple of days later, and since I still didn't know what to do, I didn't reply. I just left it. It got later and later, days and weeks, and I still hadn't replied ... I hoped he'd take that as a no. I felt more relief than anything else that he was out of the picture.

-----

Anyway, that's the history ... I hadn't seen him for a year and a half, but then I met him again in Tesco. I would rather have just said hi and carried on with my shopping, but he walked around with me talking for about five minutes. I didn't really know what to say. He asked me out again ... I said I didn't know, I'm really busy this year, but I gave him my mobile number. Then he kissed me. In the cheese aisle, when I was still thinking about my shopping list and trying to remember bus timetables. He said he'd text me, and he wants to date.

Now what do I do? I don't really want to date him, or at least I don't think I do. I don't fancy him, ditto. On the other hand, I don't dislike him. When I think about dating him, I just feel nervous and anxious. Not good. When I think about dating somebody generic, I feel nervous but good. I'm fairly sure I should just tell him please don't try to catch me, I'm not interested. It feels so mean, though. He seems so smitten with me. Has he been pining for 18 months? Or what? Should I try to make excuses, like I'm too busy? Or semi-lying excuses, like I'm asexual, I'm interested in someone else? Should I just completely ignore him? Should I give him another date? It would probably be for the best if I told him straight - I'm not interested, don't waste your time. I don't know if I can, though. If he texts me, maybe I could text him back with that. I don't know what to do ....

Whoa, thanks for that.
First of all, it is a perfect example of why so many guys fail. They become way too clingy and fail to make the girl feel attraction. Him throwing all these compliments at you didn't change that situation one bit. (That's the nice guy - and even from the above you can see that he didn't follow the 1, 2, 3 order I listed from that book earlier in the thread.)
You obviously have the right to feel as you do.
(The analogy: How would any of us guys feel if we met an overly-pushy girl whom we were not attracted to, but we don't want to hurt her feelings? Get the point?).

Thanks for sharing your insight on this, maybe others will see what girls are going through in similar times. And this is also why guys accuse girls of being confusing. Because you have to state where you stand! If you run, he'll chase.

To answer your question. You obviously want out of this whole ordeal because it's causing drama. You should just be honest with him. In the first place, just set things straight with this guy. You don't want him kissing you, then say so. I don't recommend you completely ignoring him without saying why. Just tell him that you have no intention of dating him and then ignore him. He's a guy and honestly you are not to blame if he gets too disappointed or breaks down. It's his fault. I don't wanna sound cruel but it's jus the truth.
Tell him straight and if he continues with this contacting thing just let the police know that you don't want this guy chasing you around.

You don't, you just always assume she does.

Exactly right!!! =)
(Well, except for when it is obvious that she likes you from the things people listed earlier in the thread.)

 

[Civrules]

Good day! I do have a question about girls if I may ask.

Now we have a new employee at work and she's a pleasant young woman to talk to. Now otherwise I wouldn't suspect anything. However I've noticed very small things that may or may not be anything significant, such as her express wish to sit next to me during a company meeting or inserting smilies into her emails with me in cases in which other co-workers wouldn't put any smilies. However I could easily dismiss it as youthful exuberance as I believe she is still in university and merely enthusiastic. I'm not looking for any sort of relationship at this time but I figure it would fulfill some whimsical curiosity in me to know her true intentions.

Well if it is obvious that she is sitting next to you time and again when she has the option to sit elsewhere she clearly doesn't dislike you.
Now you've the advantage of taking it wherever you wish.

 

[CartesianFart]

Now what do I do? I don't really want to date him, or at least I don't think I do. I don't fancy him, ditto. On the other hand, I don't dislike him. When I think about dating him, I just feel nervous and anxious. Not good. When I think about dating somebody generic, I feel nervous but good. I'm fairly sure I should just tell him please don't try to catch me, I'm not interested. It feels so mean, though. He seems so smitten with me. Has he been pining for 18 months? Or what? Should I try to make excuses, like I'm too busy? Or semi-lying excuses, like I'm asexual, I'm interested in someone else? Should I just completely ignore him? Should I give him another date? It would probably be for the best if I told him straight - I'm not interested, don't waste your time. I don't know if I can, though. If he texts me, maybe I could text him back with that. I don't know what to do ....

Either you are gay or just extremely inhibited in a neurotic sense.If you are not physically attracted to the dude,then don't bother.

I have to say that a night out drinking with girlfriends can probably get you out of your shell in meeting guys.Just don't be alcholholic about it.

 

[Xanikk999]

A new question - and from a girl. How do I turn a guy down? Emotional baggage attached.

Spoiler the history :

I met this guy a couple of years ago. I'd just had a letter published in the New Scientist, and I was absolutely bursting with joy. Maybe I was looking very smily and flirty or something, but he was working the till at Tesco when I was buying stuff; he said I looked great, and I said thanks and forgot him. Ten minutes later, I was waiting for my bus home - and he came running after me to ask me out. He was supposed to be on duty in the shop - maybe he called it a tea break or something - but he ran about four hundred yards (or maybe more; he might have been round all the other seven stops hunting for me) to ask for my phone number. The bus was arriving just as he did, so I didn't really have time to think about what to do; so I scribbled my email address down on a scrap of paper and gave it to him.

I'm not entirely sure why I did that, or even if it was the right decision. I didn't fancy him, but I didn't dislike him. It's very flattering to be chased that way, but it was more surprising and even a bit alarming than pleasing. I feel all confused about him.

Anyway, after a few emails and phone calls back and forth, where he kept saying how great I was and I tried to put him off gently, we agreed to meet up. I thought of a local park, where we could just walk around together and talk, in private but public so that he wouldn't come on too strongly. So, we met up, we walked, we talked. He kissed me - I didn't know what to do, I just sort of turned away. We strolled around the park for a few hours, looking at the trees and flowers and ducks, and when it rained we went and sat in the cafe and talked more. He kept grabbing my hand to hold, and putting his arm around me. I didn't actively enjoy it - it made me nervous and tense - but I didn't want to hurt him by pushing him off.

I told him that I'd never had a boyfriend before, and I didn't know if I wanted one. I said that I didn't mind if he wanted to hold my hand, but I didn't seem to be developing any feelings for him - and if none did, then maybe it wasn't worth meeting again.

Eventually, I said I'd better be getting home, as I had exams quite soon and I needed to do a lot of work for them. He asked if he could walk with me to my house, and since I didn't know what to do, I said ok.

He kissed me a couple more times, and then, since I was rather obviously not inviting him in, he left. He emailed me a couple of days later, and since I still didn't know what to do, I didn't reply. I just left it. It got later and later, days and weeks, and I still hadn't replied ... I hoped he'd take that as a no. I felt more relief than anything else that he was out of the picture.

-----

Anyway, that's the history ... I hadn't seen him for a year and a half, but then I met him again in Tesco. I would rather have just said hi and carried on with my shopping, but he walked around with me talking for about five minutes. I didn't really know what to say. He asked me out again ... I said I didn't know, I'm really busy this year, but I gave him my mobile number. Then he kissed me. In the cheese aisle, when I was still thinking about my shopping list and trying to remember bus timetables. He said he'd text me, and he wants to date.

Now what do I do? I don't really want to date him, or at least I don't think I do. I don't fancy him, ditto. On the other hand, I don't dislike him. When I think about dating him, I just feel nervous and anxious. Not good. When I think about dating somebody generic, I feel nervous but good. I'm fairly sure I should just tell him please don't try to catch me, I'm not interested. It feels so mean, though. He seems so smitten with me. Has he been pining for 18 months? Or what? Should I try to make excuses, like I'm too busy? Or semi-lying excuses, like I'm asexual, I'm interested in someone else? Should I just completely ignore him? Should I give him another date? It would probably be for the best if I told him straight - I'm not interested, don't waste your time. I don't know if I can, though. If he texts me, maybe I could text him back with that. I don't know what to do ....

Tell him you [inconsiderate person]. I hate women who play a guy like that. :thumbdown

You should of told him first thing.

 

[punkbass2000]