Good Wish/Bad Wish VIII Making Your Dreams Come True... Sort of...

[Stylesrj]

Granted. It's a lot easier by a little bit. But then your teacher slams on a million more add-ons, and you'll never get it done in time. You fail Spanish. While not bad now, Mexico takes over and rules the US (somehow) and orders imprisonment for those who failed Spanish. You're then taken away at night by the police and left in a gaol cell for a few years. During this time you plan an escape tunnel and break out of prison with a couple of your buddies. You flee to Canada which is holding out Mexican military forces and rule and lie low for several years. Mexico finally annexes Canada and you're forced to flee to England. However, on your way to England, the plane crashes and you and a friend have to survive on a desert island with little food and water. You're rescued by a cruise ship passing by a day cannibalising your friend. The ship arrives in England and you enjoy a peaceful life until old age, when you suffer a heart attack and die.
All for failing Spanish. Yeah, that's fate for you!

I wish to make more twists like that.

 

[choxorn]

Granted, everyone hates reading that much text and they kill you.

I wish for twists that didn't involve the wisher's death.

 

[Seon]

Granted, but the twist that wish caused makes you laugh so much that you die, which just went against your wish and caused massive reality failure that results in tiny brain of mine go poof.

I wish I could find a better profile picture (That might be hard though )

 

[Bratmon]

Granted. Osama Bin Laden made it with a subliminal message. You get shot by the FBI.

I wish I had an untwistable wish.

 

[Seon]

Granted. See above post for your untwistable wish

I wish I could see more twists (That is not any part of my body or anything around me for 100 lightyears (unless you mean it figuratively)) in this thread.

 

[Bratmon]

The above broke the two post rule and will therefore not be counted

 

[Seon]

Oops sorry guys!

 

[Stylesrj]

Granted. The wish is so untwistable that it violates the laws of physics or something. Gravity kills you.

I wish to have fire stick to shoot in space canoe.

 

[SS-18 ICBM]

Granted. I assumed you wanted a fire stick in your canoe. The canoe burns. So do you.

I wish the next wishes were actually decipherable.

 

[choxorn]

Granted, it's decipherable, but only if you have a way to translate from Croatian.

Želim ovaj tekst je na engleskom jeziku.

 

[Seon]

(Uhhh... Choxorn, do you really expect us to go for the trouble of activating our Babelfishes? )

 

[choxorn]

No, Mr. Seon, I expect you to die use Google Translate.

 

[Seon]

It says I want this text to be in English... no wish in it

 

[choxorn]

Damn it... I typed in "I wish this text was in English", and it gives me that.

 

[Stylesrj]

Granted. It's now in English, so now the wish makes no sense?

I wish for world peace (can't go wrong right?)

 

[Bratmon]

Granted, It's peaceful because everyone's dead.

I wish I was charismatic.

 

[mythmonster2]

Granted, but you are so charismatic that you are too charismatic. Some random person kills you because he thinks you're Hitler incarnate.

I wish I got a 100 on all my exams.

 

[Stuck in Pi]

EDIT: x-post

 

[Seon]

Granted, but they used the wrong answer keys

I wish I had the answere keyes (THE CORRECT ONES) for my exam and get away with it forever.

 

[Dragonson]

Granted. You get away with it, but get a job as mirror licker.

I wish i had unliminited time.