How NOT to write a "professional" game review

[Maniacal]

And why you and I do not and/or should not go to this "professional review" websites.

The "writer" for IGN who wrote IGN's review for Dead Space 2 has very poor writing skills. People on Reddit criticized his poor writing and the link was sent to him by a co-worker. The writer became defensive and wrote an article criticizing Reddit(ors) and defending himself. Someone posted this to show him how bad his writing is (which eh still didn't seem to understand).

Picture spoilered for size (long).

Spoiler :

Credit to Yobgal for the image, which was apparently fueled by beer.

EDIT:
Greg's original reply (the IGN "writer").

Some troll has registered Xongle Bongle.

 

[Azale]

I just had a gut feeling before I even opened the thread that it would be about IGN.

 

[Captain2]

I disagree with the editor entirely, as a fan of the phrase "pimped out" in professional journalism I support this great step forward.

 

[Rub'Rum]

The writing isn't great, sounds like me when I just babble about a game here, which isn't thought out as a professional review anyway.

That being said, the only difference between his review and any other IGN review is the more obvious bad writing. I'm saying that because, in terms of content, it's not much worst than other professional "reviews" out there. You could even say it may be a bit better (he seems to convey what the game made him feel like at least).

 

[PhroX]

That's....horrendous. If, as I will assume given the use of the word "professional", this person is getting paid for it, then the world is even more wrong than I thought...Hell, it's almost as bad as that FM "review" from one of the big games sites (may have even been IGN, I forget) a couple of years back.

 

[Abaddon]

Who still uses IGN?

 

[Sonereal]

That was horrific.

 

[LightSpectra]

I was highly amused by this, probably because I was imagining all of the commentary being said in the voice of Tom Servo.

 

[Luckymoose]

Who still uses IGN?

Me, for one. The site isn't horrible, and the forums are great to troll.

 

[e350tb]

Who still uses IGN?

I go there for screenshots.

 

[SuperJay]

I love this. So many people think they are "writers" because they have a keyboard and an Internet connection, it's just ridiculous.

Thank you.

 

[Disgustipated]

I love this. So many people think they are "writers" because they have a keyboard and an Internet connection, it's just ridiculous.

Thank you.

hey, I am a writer!

 

[SuperJay]

hey, I am a writer!

You and everyone else on the interw3bz!! GRATS BRO

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

This reads like a kid's school assignment.

And after reading the comments to Greg's response, it would seem I'm not alone in that sentiment.

 

[Sullla]

Yes, the writing is pretty awful. But I'm more bothered by the overall tone of the "review" than the terrible writing style. If you didn't know the context, it would sound almost identical to an advertisement for the game in question. Everything about the game is positive in the writer's eyes; I mean, he simultaneously praises it for being "new and surprising" and also "sticking to the same old formula." This is the online equivalent of a cheesy TV infomercial.

Now maybe Dead Space 2 is simply so amazing that the writer was blown away (so blown away that he forgot how to write, heh). However, more and more you get this tone from every reviewer about every big new game to come out. Does anyone still take these things seriously? How can you have a true process of critical review if every "reviewer" is shilling for publisher advertising cash?

It's pretty depressing.

 

[Rub'Rum]

Yeah pretty much Sulla. It's at this point where that's how I read ratings too:

100 % = okay I should probably check this game out
90-100 % = Should ask around on this message board to see if it's really that good
80 - 90 % = probably niche fun, possibly a good game if it's a style I like
less than 80 % = probably complete crap.

 

[Sonereal]

Yeah pretty much Sulla. It's at this point where that's how I read ratings too:

100 % = okay I should probably check this game out
90-100 % = Should ask around on this message board to see if it's really that good
80 - 90 % = probably niche fun, possibly a good game if it's a style I like
less than 80 % = probably complete crap.

There are exceptions to the last one.

 

[Rub'Rum]

Hence "probably".

 

[Maniacal]

That is a bad view, and you are a bad person for thinking like that and you should feel bad.

 

[SS-18 ICBM]

I was expecting more than just grammar nitpicking, which seems to be the vast majority of the complaints.