Joan d'Tupace

[tupaclives]

Joan d'Tupace was a nice girl, and had come to be in charge of the French.
d'Tupace was regarded by her own people as very capable and she had a great deal of faith in her own abilities. Her cousin Tupacius of the Romans had achieved World Domination of his own planet and had challenged d'Tupace to do the same or better. However d'Tupace felt that in order to prove she was greater she would have to do it without the advantages that Tupacius had. So as she looked for a home to start on she kept several things in mind.

She must not have a food bonus.
She may not have more than 2 BG.
She may have a source of fresh water.
She must start close to another AI.
She must play on Pangea.

This is where she ended up.

WORLD SETTINGS
Vanilla
Deity
Standard
7 opponents
Pangea
70% Water
Temperate
Cool
5 Billion years
All victory conditions enabled

Not a bad start at first glance however a quick fog gaze revealed taht there was a solitary BG within the radius, no food bonus and an AI right next door. She decided to call it home.

It took a mere 7 turns to meet her neighbours.

Well that ruled out expansion to the south, d'Tupace had started on a min run on Writing and so with some of her cash saved up she decided to buy one of Monty's workers for 30gp.

As she continued to explore it wasnt long before she encountered the Japanese. As they had exactly the same techs as the Aztecs d'Tupace saw a chance for trade.

Then the babylonians arrived.

Hami was up mysticism but down Alphabet, and d'Tupace was relectunt to give up her powerful monopoly on Alphabet, that was her ticket to glory.

In Paris d'Tupace had built warrior --> warrior --> warrior --> settler, popping the settler just as Paris grew to size 3. The settler made his way NE and founded the town of Orleans. d'Tupace was excited, she now had 2 Cities compared to her neighbours 5 or 6.

d'Tupace found out that the Babylonians had learned about alphabet so to prevent them profitting from the knowledge d'Tupace called up Monty and sold him Alphabet and 1 gp for Mysticism then called up Tokugawa and sold him Alphabet, Mysticism and 10gp for IW. d'Tupace was delighted, her two starting techs had netted her 7 techs by themselves.

It wasn't long before she met new friends. The Iroquois.

They were hopelesly backward lacking alphabet, masonry and bronze working.

d'Tupace's min run on writing had paid off, plenty of cash and it still came in as a monopoly. However she knew she couldn't hoard it so back to the trading table it was.

Irqoquois: Alphabet for Contact with Russia
Babylon: Writing for Contact with Germany, HBR and 2gp
Aztecs: Writing for contact with Zululand and 113gp
Zulu: Writing for 77gp
Germany: Pottery for 10gp.

With all the cash from her trades d'Tupace was now able to afford embassies with everyone in the world. This made her a popular young lady.

In 2070, nearly 2000 years after founding Paris there were finally enough people in France to found a 3rd city. Named Lyons.

Lyons was founded where it was for a very specific purpose.

Tokugawa demanded 23 gp and d'Tupace accepted. 23gp was a small price to pay to remain alive. And she would have revenge. Oh yes, there would be a reckoning for this.

Iron Working, purchased from Japan so long ago now came in handy. A quick survey revealed iron in the hills north of Lyons so the next settler was sent there (in 1550bc) and the town of Rheims was founded.

Now d'Tupace had iron. That was what she wanted to hear.

d'Tupace knew she had reached the time for war. Although she had just four cities she had no more room. It was war or be consumed. She had iron, or else she would have conceeded defeat but the task before her was great. She did however find space to squeeze one more city.

And to poach land in a place she had no right to be

She had 4 swordsmen. When she had 5 she would make her move. She had no choice, if she didn't she would die...

 

[Takeo]

Nice start! And you have an assault force almost ready to go.

 

[SimpleMonkey]

Hey, one more city west of Paris. Snag that wheat!

Looking forward to seeing Joan conquor the world with 5 swordsmen.

 

[tupaclives]

d'Tupace had her fifth swordsman and so she declared on the one neighbour she felt she could conceivably, maybe not die instantly against. Good ol' Monty

Her 5 swords marched on Teotihuacan, a thorn in the side of Paris for thousands of years. They captured the city, but only to give Paris access to the silks there. Work was immediately begun on a settler to move the city 1 tile SW.

With d'Tupace now consolidating Hami came demanding money and maps from d'Tupace. As she had no army to speak of save those swords in Aztecland she had no choice but to bow to the demands, as much as it hurt her. Immediately Bismarck made an identical demand.
d'Tupace had heard of Bismarck from Tupacius and he was indeed as bald, ugly and stupid as she had heard. Still, now was not the time for rash actions. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

d'Tupace had gained a lux from the war and so now offered Monty peace in exchange for... ahem... 'adequate reparations'

With peace in France again d'Tupace did not neglect her duties in building the army. After all France was still well and truly the weakest nation of the world. d'Tupace had continued to work hard on research and she had recycled one of Tupacius' old ideas, the currency bee-line. Maths had been futile, she'd been beaten to it, but currency she had got before a few of the AI's and so she began to trade

Babylon: Currency for Polytheism, Territory Map and 50gp.
Germany: Currency + Polytheism for Construction + TM

That put d'Tupace into the Middle Ages in 775bc. No one else had any cash to buy techs so d'Tupace bought TM from everyone which gave her an almost-complete view of her continent.

To celebrate she founded a new city.

She now had 8 cities, enough for a FP should a suitable site ever be found.

She then abandoned Teotihuacan (back to 7 cities) and refounded the city of Avignon.

d'Tupace had 10 swords now. Not many, but enough to risk another war. d'Tupace's advisors were horrified.

Military Advisor: How can you risk a war when we are 'weak' compared to everyone.
d'Tupace: Because we have 10 swordsmen.
Military Advisor: So what? That means nothing, they probably have 20, plus spears and horses! Our cities are defended by regular warriors for pity's sake.
d'Tupace: I don't care. If we don't risk we will not gain, yes we could lose and be wiped out but if thats the worst thing that happens to you in a day then consider yourself lucky.
Military Advisor: What could possibly be worse!?!?
d'Tupace: You've clearly never been to Rockhampton...

The stack of swords charged at Izumo. Many people why target that city when it offered nothing over the city northwest (Nagoya) to it which would give France access to some horses. The reason was because the city beyond Izumo had wines. And d'Tupace was eager for a 3rd native lux.

While d'Tupace's men healed the Zulu invented this strange idea of recording things in great volumes and storing them in Libraries. d'Tupace offered Shaka 30gp and the secrets of Currency for it and a world map.

Zulu: Currency + 30gp for Literature + WM.

A force of four newly trained swords attacked Nagoya from Rheims and finally d'Tupace had a pony!

By leaving 1 sword in Nagoya and 1 in Izumo d'Tupace was able to divert 17 swords to attack Satsuma and get control of those grapes. Now d'Tupace could show the world that French Wine is the best!

d'Tupace now felt like Japan had learnt its lesson for its earlier demands she so called up Tokugawa and offered him a very reasonable peace deal.

With the trade lines now open again d'Tupace was able to sell some of her fine silks from Avignon to the Iroquois in exchange for some of their tasty spices and 30gp

Iroquois: Silks for Spices + 30gp

As d'Tupace had been paying Monty 1gpt as part of their peace treaty she was forced to sign on for another 20 turns when it came up for review

Now d'Tupace had a pitifully small and weak empire with a deadbeat economy and was potentially only a turn away from losing the game.
Hey, things are looking up!

 

[tupaclives]

It has been 2 wars, horses, 2 luxuries and a good many years since d'Tupace last was able to do some consolidating. To start with the lands that once were Nagoya became the lands of Besancon and d'Tupace at last had her pony.

d'Tupace also took another leaf out of her cousin Tupacius' book by donning the balaclava and suction cups of a master thief and toddled off to Kyoto to see what she could do.

Now that d'Tupce knew about this Republic thing that had served Tupacius so well she decided to have a revolution as well.

6 turns later she felt richer, happier and better all round.

She then founded the city of Rouen north of Satsuma on the hill. Although she didn't know it then, founding on the hill would, in time, prove to be one of the smartest things that d'Tupace did in the entire game.

Then the world began to descend into war. And d'Tupace didn't even have a hand in it.

There weren't even any MA's involved in it!

d'Tupace cash rushed a pike in Rouen. She saw the bab stack next to it and knew what was going to happen. The turn that the pike finished d'Tupace dialed up Hami and bought Monotheism and Engineering + 137gp for 91gpt.

She then demanded Hami leave and this happened.

The lone pike then fends off 3 swordsmen and 5 Bowmen to hold the line magnificently. A reg pike, defence 3 fortified gives it 3.75 + the hill bumps its to 4.5. It should have died. It had no right to win that fight but it did. How? It was the magic of Tupac. Of course its redlined and with a bucketload more babs piling in d'Tupace knew that it would probably die next turn.

With the silks/spices deal having now expired d'Tupace called up Hiawatha and put those silks to good use.

d'Tupace also noticed Baldy lacked Engineering so she offered to teach it to him and pay 36gp in exchange for Chivalry.

Germany: Engineering + 36gp for Chivalry.

Engineering, Chivalry and 80gp was enough to get the Zulu in against babylon and acquire Theology at the same time.

Sastsuma was abandoned so that Rouen would be the sink for Bab troops, the settler refounded a city 1 tile SE. Walls were rushed in Rouen as well as all other cities along the bab border, these were followed up by pikes ot hold the line. All was looking good. d'Tupace could hold on until the alliances expired then take the babs for peace. If all went well she could even get a tech or something in the peace if she killed enough troops.

But then this happened.

Can d'Tupace deal with 2 unwanted deity wars while defending her empire with bailing wire and scotch tape?

 

[Sima Qian]

Woah you play fast, made it to middle ages in the second update already!

 

[tupaclives]

Ahhh yes, but it isnt to AD yet. It may be the middle ages but thats because on pangea deity the tech rate is ridiculously fast.

 

[conquer_dude]

Awesome! Berraling in the updates!

 

[Mirc]

Great!

BTW, congrats conquer_dude for your 1200th post! I bet you will make 2000 faster than me. I should be ashamed that I don't post as much as I should. Keep it like this!

Edit: Worldmap (after the last wars)? Current year?

 

[stocktracker]

Can d'Tupace deal with 2 unwanted deity wars while defending her empire with bailing wire and scotch tape?

I have a hard enough time defending my empire with one civilization after me. At least Babylon does not share a big border with you. Keeping Japan happy at this point is very important.

 

[tupaclives]

d'Tupace looked at the mess before her. Her armies were divided and scattered and even that bailing wire and scotch tape was looking thin. She had to do something fast. She decided to chance the babylonian border. Troops would take too long to arrive so she bought walls and pikes in every city that could and would simply pray that they could hold. The Aztecs in the south however would be a more significant threat in that their armies had just 1 city between them and Paris. d'Tupace mustered all the troops she could spare and organised a potentially suicidal charge into Aztec territory. The plan was to deal them a blow so great they would lose their taste for battle and be willing to accept peace. 16 swordsmen made the long march, unsupported by catapults and unprotected by pikes, they arrived at the gates of Tenotchitlan.

16 swords charged, 8 survived and the last sword's victory was enough to take the ancient city, which held not only the great wall (crucial to holding the Babylonian border steady) but also the hanging gardens, which would be of great benefit to the whole empire.

However as it was the last sword the redlined sword would have to pray it was not attacked. It was...

By an Elite knight...

And in an amazing result he killed the elite knight and was promoted to elite himself.

Another small force of swords moving out of Tours and attacked Xochicalco whose name translates to 'a dyslexic's nightmare'. The city fell but it would only be held until a settler could be produced from it to move the city onto the coast.

d'Tupace called up Monty, success! The plan had worked and d'Tupace was able to get a very generous peace offer out of Monty.

The town of Dijon replaced Xochicalco and with the Aztec border 'secure' d'Tupace was able to divert defences, and a force of 8 newly trained knights to the babylonian border. Those knights proved crucial as they cracked open the defences of Samarra without loss.

The Iroquois made peace with Babylon to d'Tupace's dissapointment but it meant that d'Tupace had silks to trade again and happily took a straight swap for those lovely spices.

A new city (Amiens) was founded on the ruins of Samarra and pikes were moved in to defend it from Rheims, thus freeing up the knights to continue the attack to Zariqum.

The Zulu made peace with the babylonians meaning that d'Tupace was free to do so as well. She dialed up Hami and was suprised to be able to get Invention for peace + 60gp. It was a deal too good to pass up.

d'Tupace however was massivly behind in tech. As well as having a woeful economy and an army that was the laughing stock of the world. The second two could be easily rectified with markets and knights however the first was not easy. Without a strong economy d'Tupace could not self-research to parity, nor trade to parity. However what she could do, was don the balaclava once again...

She was not at tech parity yet but she was much closer, she also discovered that Bismarck did not know how to bank yet so d'Tupace agreed to teach him in exchange for Gunpowder and Music lessons. She even threw in two luxs to make sure of the deal.

Germany: Banking + furs + Ivory + 40gp for Gunpowder + Music Theory.

Cherbourg was founded on the ruins of Zariqum, and Poiters between Cherbourg and Amiens.

Now d'Tupace waited, and waited. And built her economy and her army, and when 20 turns of peace had expired. She turned on Monty once again.

Monty was more than a little suprised by the stack of 25 knights about to enter his territory

 

[conquer_dude]

Too late for Japan. They already hate your guts

Woah-Cross update!

Mirc, thanks!

 

[Takeo]

You've had great luck with the tech steals! How much is that costing you for each steal?

 

[conquer_dude]

It costs about 470 gold doesnt it?

 

[tupaclives]

Well the steals in the update I'm about to post were costing me 1600gp for a safe steal. I used to risk immediate's but not anymore. They have an enormous failure rate so the double cost for a safe steal is more than worth it. I have to confess here I am using wat in GOTM or RBD would be regarded as an exploit. The fact that when you do steals if you steal the tech you are currently researching you can then say 'whats the big picture' when asked about what tech next and then you can steal a second tech.

Update coming soon.

 

[tupaclives]

d'Tupace began to orchestrate the assault on Aztecland, starting at the new capital of Calixtlahuaca. 25 knights rode through the city and suffered no losses.

A settler then followed the road to the city, abandoned it and founded the city of Toulouse.

Several Pikes arrived in Tenotchitlan to relieve the swords from the last expedition, they then headed straight to Texcoco and d'Tupace smiled as she gained control of the third Aztec wonder

Of course in such a hopelessly corrupt town it would never be of any use but still, it was nice to have it.

d'Tupace upgraded all her Pikes to Musketmen and defending the city of Avignon against a Longbow resulted in a victory for a musketman causing this to happen.

Following the advice of an ancient sage known as Simple Monkey d'Tupace ordered the construction of a fishing village to the west of Paris 'by the wheat.'

d'Tupace tried to call up Monty but he didn't want to hear from her so she resolved to cause him some more pain. The knights riding out from Toulouse arrived at Tlatelco and Monty immediatly wished he'd built troops there instead of working Smith's Trading Company, if he had he might have been able to hold the city. Instead it wa yet another Aztec city that had fallen to the French onslaught.

d'Tupace was suprised to learn she was still last in score by a mile and was in fact losing ground, she was also still weak compared to all nations including the Aztecs and Japan.

The first thing d'Tupace did next was check to see who the most advanced was. As far as she could discern it was Babylon and so she headed their with a little deviousness in mind.

With knights coming out of Orleans and Paris every two turns due to the Golden Age it wasn't long before d'Tupace had a third force who could move down the west coast.

d'Tupace was also intruiged to know where Monty was getting all his money from!

The Iroquois silk/spices deal was also up for reveiw and d'Tupace actually had to PAY 50gp now!

Continuing on from Tlatelco the knights attacked Tzintzuntzen and captured the city. Monty was on his last legs but still wouldnt talk.

Not to be out done the swords moved out of Texcoco to Tlacoplan which was protected by spears and so fell very easily. And with that the Aztecs were removed from the East althogether.

Now Monty would talk, and he was willing to give plenty for peace.

Some more diplomatic work was going around. As Babylon recruited Russia in a Military Alliance against Zululand.

d'Tupace wanted to continue warring while in her golden age so she sent her clumsiest spy to Kyoto.

d'Tupace might not have had any sort of a break from warring but her Republic was holding up well without the need for the lux slider and she was still yet to lose a war.

 

[Mirc]

Worldmap ?

 

[tupaclives]

Ask and ye shall receive

 

[Ansar]

Is the yellow civ Egypt?

Btw, great job on the wars.

 

[Mirc]

Thank you! Great job!