JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
I die, henceforth escaping ghrough another plane of existence.
Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition
- Thread starter Thorvald of Lym
- Start date
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2010
- Messages
- 8,873
"It's tooooooo late, losers!" I say while poking out my tongue as I perform a daring escape using my helicopter.
GenMarshall
High Elven ISB Capt & Ghost Agent
I heal myself to full health using a medpack in my inventory.
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
2 (9): His digital design enables him to dodge your damage delivery most dexterously!CivCube said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
17 (11): Your evil twin siphons off 8
for his nefarious schemes!ROLL TO DODGE!
7 (8): Meanwhile in the physical world you continue to fend off Christos.
11 (8): It's not magic, it's miracles!Omega124 said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
18 (20): George launches a vicious assault, carving out 15 hitpoints and inflicting ongoing 3 damage per turn! He attacks you again!
ROLL TO DODGE!
3 (9): You block his follow-up strike. He attacks you again!
ROLL TO DODGE!
1 (7): You counter his feint, delivering 14 damage as he struggles to recover. He attacks you again!
18 (20): Taking aim with his gun, he shoots out 20 hitpoints. Your wounds are taking their toll, lowering your basic defence -1. George goes after the Hyena.
ROLL TO DODGE!
3 (5): Lured into a trap, he's savaged for 12 damage and ongoing -3 hitpoints from open wounds.
The Namibian regulars are still recouping.
The Hyena goes two for two.
ROLL TO DODGE!
1 (5): George sends it fleeing with several shots worth 15 damage.
The Enchanter tries to stun the Mad King to buy everyone more time.
ROLL TO DODGE!
18 (20): George is struck by a confusion spell, preventing his attacks and penalizing his defence a further -3 for the next three turns!
The Master promptly makes his move.
ROLL TO DODGE!
3 (6): His diabolical plan is thwarted by the arrival of Monarchist troops, and he suffers 6 damage.
The HyenaGeneral tries to shoot the gun right out of the Mad King's grip.
ROLL TO DODGE!
18 (20): An expert shot deals 17 damage. The pistol goes skittering across the ground.
The Bluecapes are still resting up.
The Rhinoceros goes to bash George right in the head!
ROLL TO DODGE!
4 (6): He dodges at the last second, dealing 4 damage on the pass.
6 (5): But if this is a world with the China Six, does that mean Jehoshua is mediating the afterlife???JohannaK said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
20 (13): Maybe not, since by some miracle you avoid all incoming fire.
12 (13): You also fart in their general direction for good measure.NinjaCow64 said:
17: Using up the kit, you max out your hitpoints.CivGeneral said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
19 (20): Invigorated with reckless bravado, you promptly charge into the surrounding troops, dealing 22 damage.
It looks like the USS Mike Pence is heading for the Kennedy Space Center for repairs!
The EKNC doubles down on India for that precious spaceship!
ROLL TO DODGE!
13 (14): The western lines start to fold, though the main front remains deadlocked... for now. The South African cell launches an incursion into the Rhino Socialist Paradise!
ROLL TO DODGE!
2 (2): The operation is a resounding failure, and the frontline countries fortify 2 points. Monarchist forces in America close in on D.C.
ROLL TO DODGE!
6 (11): The American capital falls in a surprisingly anticlimactic battle. A displaced Big Bill Hell joins the fight in Pennsylvania! Back in Africa, the Somali terrorists invade Eritrea.
ROLL TO DODGE!
18 (20): Sweeping in through the east, the hordes undermine Eritrean and Ethiopian Defence -2.
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2010
- Messages
- 8,873
I give instructions to the helicopter pilot to fly me over the location of CivCube's epic battle, giving me sniper positions against Evil Agent CivCube and Christos Xinjiang.
Omega124
Challenging Fate
It's a President's Day Miracle!
I start singing the Internationale to rally my troops to attack, attack, attack while the opening is here
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
I surrender and get imprisoned in the Space Odyssey.
GenMarshall
High Elven ISB Capt & Ghost Agent
It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum! I lay the smack down on the troops.
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
9: You come under anti-aircraft fire as you approach the coastline.NinjaCow64 said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
13 (15): They're pretty poor shots and you avoid taking damage.
4 (7): *Note to self: Install CYBER LAZAH*CivCube said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
16 (10): Agent CivCube is unable to siphon off your health.
ROLL TO DODGE!
20 (20): OH NO CHRISTOS STOLE BACK THE HORSE TALISMAN!!!
10 (13): Everyone gets a +1 attack bonus this turn.Omega124 said:
George may be unable to attack, but that doesn't mean he can't invoke his Executive Power: Fourth of August Regime!
ROLL TO DODGE!
10 (7): You're powerless to stop him abolishing the constitution, opening up a slew of future support powers!
The Namibian army is getting its act together.
The Hyena goes for George's other arm.
ROLL TO DODGE!
17 (20): It mauls him for 16 damage, inflicting bone-crushing wounds that lower his defence -1 and will bleed out at -4 hitpoints/turn!
The Enchanter tries to patch up Omega.
ROLL TO DODGE!
5: Having little training in actual medicine, he worsens the bleed to -5 hitpoints/turn.
The Master strikes while the iron is hot.
ROLL TO DODGE!
3 (7): The strategy falls through at the last second due to a critical oversight.
The HyenaGeneral aims for the knees.
ROLL TO DODGE!
19 (20): Crippling shots knock out both joints, dealing 21 damage and impeding the Mad King's mobility -4.
The Bluecapes are still catching their breath.
The Rhinoceros decides to see how far a madman can fly.
ROLL TO DODGE!
8 (11): He's bashed around for 9 damage.
Big Bill Hell chucks one of his crappy cars at George.
ROLL TO DODGE!
16 (20): The self-styled Emperor of Asia is crushed for 17 damage and pinned in place, lowering his combat rolls -3!
1 (1): You are captured, debriefed, violated, and indoctrinated into the Monarchist cause! In exchange for stopping your bleed-out, you suffer an automatic -10 to any rolls contravening the goals of the Eternal Kingdom. Branded a World Traitor, all other players gain a +5 attack bonus against you, and if the Kingdom loses this round, you do, too!JohannaK said:
13 (15): You deal 14 damage to exposed infantry.CivGeneral said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
17 (18): You intercept a contingent as it tries to regroup, dealing another 18 damage.
With JohannaK folded, the EKNC gains a +3 bonus in its push into Andhra Pradesh.
ROLL TO DODGE!
9 (13): The hordes seize the region, and with it, the USS Space Oddity! The American cell renews the Cuban offensive.
ROLL TO DODGE!
12 (9): lol still can't catch a break. The South African bandits push into Tanzania.
ROLL TO DODGE!
18 (20): Southern territories fall, eroding the Defence of Tanzania, Malawi, Mozambique and Zambia -2. The Somali terrorists try to finish off Yemen.
ROLL TO DODGE!
17 (16): Survivors retreat to the last line in Sa'dah.
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
I am unbreakable, though.
GenMarshall
High Elven ISB Capt & Ghost Agent
I let out a battle cry to demoralize the engaging troops.
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2010
- Messages
- 8,873
Now we have avoided the AA, its pretty easy to establish the sniping position. So I order my pilot to that.
Last edited:
Omega124
Challenging Fate
I stare intently at my wounds to get them to heal up
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
10 (12): You treat him to a round of fisticuffs, dealing 15 e-damage.CivCube said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
11 (5): You quickly establish why you're the dominant persona, beating him back for another 16 damage.
ROLL TO DODGE!
9 (10): You hold Christos' attack at bay.
19 (8): If that were true, you wouldn't have surrendered, duuuuuh..!JohannaK said:
8 (6): It comes out more as a strangled yell that scratches your throat for 3 damage.CivGeneral said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
19 (20): It's funny, you wanna be a warrior, but just sitting here bouncing bullets back seems to be the winning strategy. The 33rd takes 13 damage, and you net a QBZ assault rifle from one dumb fool that charged straight into his own bullets.
13: You get line-of-sight on CivCube's duel with Premier Christos.NinjaCow64 said:
12 (11): You intimidate your platelets to congeal faster, reducing the bleed by 2 hitpoints/turn.Omega124 said:
King George tries to Rig the Exchange Rate!
ROLL TO DODGE!
10: He is unable to increase his slush-fund healing rate... for now.
The Namibian expedition is almost recovered...
The Hyena goes for the Mad King's exposed limbs.
ROLL TO DODGE!
2 (6): Unfortunately being buried under a car provides unexpected protection, and he lashes back for 11 damage.
The Enchanter takes a moment to gather his mana so that he can actually magic right.
ROLL TO DODGE!
9: He's interrupted by gunfire from EKNC forces.
The Master tries to divert the Monarchist troops.
ROLL TO DODGE!
7: He is unable to execute the ruse.
The HyenaGeneral gets in close and personal.
ROLL TO DODGE!
13 (18): With a sickening crack it shatters his left arm, inflicting 19 damage and weakening his basic defence -2.
Recovered enough to take to the offensive, the Bluecapes do just that.
ROLL TO DODGE!
1 (3): But not enough to hold firm. The partisans retreat for another 3 turns.
The Rhinoceros pretends the car is on fire to stamp on it.
ROLL TO DODGE!
14 (20): It's like making a panini, except instead of bread it's the epidermis of a genocidal tyrant, and instead of sandwich filling it's his vital organs. 28 damage inflicted, and George acquires a mild concussion impeding all actions -2.
Big Bill Hell tries to scam the king out of his savings.
ROLL TO DODGE!
4 (6): He accidentally closes on a good deal, leading to equipment procurement for the frontline forces. All divisions not currently in combat will recover a random number of hitpoints each turn!
The USS Mike Pence touches down at the Kennedy Space Center for repairs.
The EKNC launches a fresh offensive into Kyrgyzstan.
ROLL TO DODGE!
17 (15): The forces finally manage a breakthrough. The South African cell hits Mozambique again.
ROLL TO DODGE!
9 (7): "Oh, Fat Man, please! This is getting awkward." The American invaders move in on dat oil-rich Arctic.
ROLL TO DODGE!
3 (12): Yukon Territory falls under the Monarchist heel. The Somali marauders aim to finish off Ethiopia.
ROLL TO DODGE!
3 (13): The final line of resistance crumbles.
Ethiopia has been defeated by the EKNC!
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
At least I regained my sanity.
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2010
- Messages
- 8,873
Using my epic sniper skills, I shoot Christos' wrist which causes an involantary muscle twitch, causing him to throw the Horse Talisman up into the air, which I then catch and use for myself. I dub this move the NinjaCow64 Technique.
Omega124
Challenging Fate
I procure a burger to eat
