Dear Journal,
Saturday sucked. I was chillaxing, cleaning the public restoom, and then went to the common room. There were a bunch of jerkass strangers in there watching the news about Nazis slugging it out with Americans. [Tell them about the bear.] Yeah, there was a BEAR. Just...there. It just appeared there! I had no idea what was going on, but no one seemed to care, so I didn't. [Then it turned into a hawk and flew out while everyone else left. Yeah, stupid.]
It wasn't THAT stupid. I think the Manbearpig turned into the hydra later. [Sources Needed]. Still, I fly out there and get gassed by one of the Nazis. [Like an idiot.] I charged AT the Nazi who threw the gas grenade and smacked her down with my righteous axe. [And by that, Micky means he hit her three times, she was still standing, and then he tried to flirt with her until the GM killed her.] I tried to ask for her name. [Being named=/=immortality. Stop breaking the fourth wall .]
My memory is a bit fuzzy on what happened afterwards, because Big Nazi Guy knocked me out. [YODO. Anyway, Manbearpig turned into a Hydra and started...I don't know. Manbearpig was more useless than Mickey during all of this as far as I know. I can't remember if that was before or AFTER Captain Chickenvane popped up and was knocked out. All of it started running together. Oh, and Mickey pissed out the big guy enough.]
And I [not you, other guy] knocked him out! But he grabbed my wrist just as I was about to kick his ice [ha] and threw me against a car. I died. [No, you fainted. You're the crappiest Pokemon I have ever had.]
[Then the idiot woke up.]
And flew home with the hot Spanish girl back to her apartment. We got free pizza! [You broke down the door and scared the pizza guy and gave him a $20 tip.]