The LAMEST jokes you can think of...

[Sophie 378]

Most of the jokes I posted in the other jokes thread would fit in quite well here. Is that good or bad?

 

[Rheinmetall]

Q: What's the difference between a duck?
A: It swims better than it walks.

 

[cthom]

a scottish joke.
i don't know if this will get me warned or not..

a husband wakes up with a terrible hangover and decides to go to the kitchen for something to eat.
there he sees his wife cooking something and goes to see what it is.
looking over her shoulder he sees her boiling a sock in a pot.
astonished, he says "why the hell are you boiling one of my socks?!"
she replies "i'm only doing what you told me to do last night!"
he leaves the kitchen muttering "i don't remember telling her to cook my sock"...

 

[Red Door]

What's the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies?

I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

 

[cthom]

there were thousands of that type of joke at school! (30 years ago!)

what's green and turns red at the press of a button?
a frog in a liquidiser.

 

[Swedishguy]

What's worser than finding a worm in an apple.

[paus]

Finding a worm in half an apple.

 

[puglover]

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple?

[pause]

The Holocaust

 

[StarWorms]

Why does Michael Jackson like 28 year olds?

There are 20 of them.

 

[Emperor2]

I find this joke, which i made up, hillarious, but nobody else does.

A chicken layed an egg on a pointed roof. Which side did the egg fall off?
Neither, chickens dont lay eggs!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! You get it, because they really do, and i said they dont, hahahahah,I must look like a real ******. Sorry, but I don't have the greatest humor sense.

 

[SuperBeaverInc.]

I think we just found the worst joke ever...

 

[Emperor2]

i have heard that too many times to feel anything other than bordem.

 

[puglover]

I think we just found the worst joke ever...

That comment singlehandedly made it one of the funniest jokes in this thread.

 

[Swedishguy]

Do you know the difference between a mailbox and an elk/moose?
If not, I wouldn't want you to post my letter.

 

[Veritass]

Do you know the difference between a Big Mac and a b***job?

No? Let's have lunch tomorrow.

 

[flaming_iles]

Time for some leper jokes methinks...

2 lepers were having a fight. One threw a punch and the other one caught it.

Why did the leper fail his driving test?
He left his foot on the accelerator...

Why did the leper ice hockey game have to be stopped?
There was a face-off in the corner...

What is the worst thing that can happen to a leper?
An epileptic fit...

 

[Emperor2]

That comment singlehandedly made it one of the funniest jokes in this thread.

To be honest, i have NO IDEA how to respond to that

 

[Nerdking]

More Leper jokes

Q: What do you call a leper in a bath?
A: Stu.

Q: Why did they stop the leper baseball game?
A: The pitcher threw his arm out and the left fielder dropped a ball.

Q: Why did they stop the leper football game?
A: There was a handoff behind the line of scrimmage.

Q: Why did they stop the leper card game?
A: One guy threw his hand in, one guy cried his eyes out, and the other one laughed his head off.

 

[classical_hero]

I find this joke, which i made up, hillarious, but nobody else does.

A chicken layed an egg on a pointed roof. Which side did the egg fall off?
Neither, chickens dont lay eggs!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! You get it, because they really do, and i said they dont, hahahahah,I must look like a real ******. Sorry, but I don't have the greatest humor sense.

I think you mean a rooster, not a Chicken, because Chickens lay eggs, Roosters do not, since they are the males.

 

[Eran of Arcadia]

Way to ruin the joke, c_h . . .

 

[Swedishguy]

Why did the skeleton cross the road?
He wanted to come to the body-shop.

Harkl.