The Rise and Fall of Radio (a BTS DI)

[Dumanios]

Dumanios, God of Winter, had seen that the Persians had weathered through the powers of the gods. He felt they needed to meet a champion of winter.

"Bob, go to Persia, and report to me on their conditions."

"Yes, milord."

For Mortal Eyes

Spoiler :

You have obtained Bob. If Bob dies, there will be very grave consequences. If he lives for three turnsets, you will be rewarded. Bob must fight, or else there will be no reward, though there won't be a consequence either.

Not For Mortal Eyes

Spoiler :

I gave Radio Noer a Praetorian with Combat 1. It's next to Persepolis, and named Bob the Dude.

 

[Radio Noer]

Playing now

 

[Radio Noer]

"This land is useless." Lord Jeremiah said. "It will get worse and worse as time goes by." I have made a chance for your people to escape this tortured existence. You must travel to my chosen lands. If you don't, then the land will get more and more distorted. I must go now."

You have obtained Bob. If Bob dies, there will be very grave consequences. If he lives for three turnsets, you will be rewarded. Bob must fight, or else there will be no reward, though there won't be a consequence either.


Just to remind myself there are 2 quests.

 

[Radio Noer]

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.​

Radio awoke to find his world inexplicably altered again.

"Double what the #@$#%@#!@!"

"Why in the good gravy's name have the whales climbed onto land, and the fish swim in the earth, how can wheat provide happiness?"

"On another note, Persopolis is looking better than ever"

Radio discovered something at trhe edge of his consciousness, a land filled with hills of gold, waiting to be settled upon, the only issue was...

"How am I to get to that wonderful island with this ice in the way, Pasargadae is landlocked and there's no way around it"

Then Sitting Bull, demanding as he was, took Code of Laws from Radio like the well-poisoning bully he is.

Radio then realized that there were dissenters, "True Persia" they called themselves, clearly "dissatisfied" with all of the "gods' interventions".

"Bob!" Radio said "Go take care of those dissenters, I'd like to have a picnic over there but they're just protesting about the 1% of gods who control 100% of this land's future"

"Yes sir, Radio, sir" Bob said.

Bob faught valiantly, and kicked the protestors out, giving Radio control of the icelocked city of True Persia, building a monument immediately to ensure their happiness.

Spoiler :

Proof of success

Radio also sent a craftly little spy into Zara Yaqob's lands, figuring things couldn't get any worse as Zara had quantified their relationship as "-100 with a big old angry face", Radio thought it was childish to quantify it in such a basic way and with such a limited vocabulary, so he stole tthe "secrets" of Monotheism from him.

Then, the greatest invention since sliced bacon, Paper, was invented in a time with bountiful trees and lots of free time (the tundra isn't exactly the most recreation friendly area to be after all).

Then, realizing that his warriors in the south were landlocked, Radio sent them farther south in this new land, discovering a place of bountiful food, if only the gods would let him get there...

Radio would persevere, he hung his head high, everything seemed at least bearable, if not ok.


Begin editing!

 

[MoreEpicThanYou]

Got the save.

 

[MoreEpicThanYou]

The Epic God appeared in Radio's palace. "Hello, puny mortal. I was the god who changed your land to mostly tundra. You should be thanking me, it's at least better than desert, right? Anyway, I was feeling semi-sentimental today, so I cleared a path through the ice to Gold Island and filled the waters with fish. But, there is a catch... there is a barbarian city on it now, Epicopolis, and defending its gates are the THREE PRAETORIANS OF OP-NESS! Get past those, and you deserve the island and its riches. Farewell."

NFRNE

Spoiler :

I cleared the path to Gold Island and filled all of its water BFC with fish. I placed a barb city on it, Epicopolis, which is guarded by the THREE PRAETORIANS OF OP-NESS! The THREE PRAETORIANS OF OP-NESS have almost every promotion there is.

 

[Lelouch]

got it
EDIT: YOU MESSED UP MY QUEST I JOIN THE GOD WAR!

 

[Lelouch]

Radio Noer heard an extremely loud explosion. He sat up, startled. He saw Lord Jeremia in a vision. In it, Lord Jeremiah said: "The Holy Lands Have been desecrated! as such, I have removed my holy blessing from that island. However, I have raised a new promised land and placed many trials. I have also given you an assortment of units. IF YOU USE THEM FOR ANYTHING OTHER THAN THE FOLLOWING TASK, THE PUNISHMENT I WILL GIVE YOU IS BEYOND YOUR WILDEST NIGHTMARES! They are in some large wooden ships, which, after they have served their purpose, you must sink immediately. there will be replacements after each trial.
You shall also see that your lands have changed once again.
NFRE:

Spoiler :

randomly changed terain of the world. PLEASE DO NOT MESS WITH MY QUEST

 

[thecaesar]

And there was dissent among the gods.

Radio Noer felt dizzy from all of the divine changes his world had been through. First it was normal, then Jungle, then Desert, then Tundra. He didn't know how the Gods could get any MORE indecisive. (hint: foreshadowing )

Just then, a door appeared. Ancient, as usual. Man, this guy needs to work on more original entrances, thought Radio. It opened, and there, as expected, stood Janus. If nothing else is constant, he thought, at least Janus's entrances are.

YOU SHOULD KNOW, I CAN HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS.

"Heh..." said Radio, suddenly very nervous.

ALL IS NOT WELL IN THE HEAVENS. THE GODS BATTLE TO MAKE THE EARTH THE WAY THEY DESIRE IT. IT IS UNSAVORY, BUT I FEEL I MUST AS WELL. MY INTERVENTION IN YOUR FATE HAS BEEN INTERRUPTED, AND I THINK IT IS TIME TO RESUME. HOWEVER, I AM GOING TO REVERSE YOUR DECISION. FOR IT DOES NOT PLEASE ME THE WAY IT IS NOW. PERSEPOLIS SHALL DIE SLOWLY, WHILE PASARGADAE RISES TO GREATNESS.

"WHAT?!? That is totally not fair! You can't do that!"

OH, CAN'T I? WELL, WE'LL TEST YOUR THEORY, THEN.

He, and the door, disappeared, along with Radio's illusion of control.

NFRE:

Spoiler :

Do exactly what the changes in my last intervention were, except flip-flop which city gets which. And also give Pasargadae a route to the ocean. AND DON'T MESS WITH THE TERRAIN OF THOSE CITIES, ESPECIALLY PERSEPOLIS, AFTER MY CHANGES ARE MADE, PLEASE.

Make sure Persepolis gets desertified in all tiles it could possibly harvest, and put jungles and fallout, and get rid of everything else, including resources, next to it.

Make Pasargadae have all grassland except for their northwestern sea route, and give them all these resources: Fish, Whale, Gold, Iron, Horse, Oil, Aluminum, and Wheat. And put forests on every land square it can harvest.

 

[brandon.herren]

The clanging of metal and sword was heard from outside the camp. The Tribal leader rose to the front leading a charge upwards. "Today we overrun our nothern neighbors. Soon, reports had reached Radio Noer, and a state of national distress began...
NFRNE

Spoiler :

Added thecaesar's edits (except got rid of Oil and Aluminum, sorry, but it had to be done...) Added 5 Groups of 2 Axeman cluttered around the borders of the empire. Added 4 Incan spies

 

[spaceman98]

Upon leaving the Oasis, the god of something went across the land, but the gods war ment that everything was constantly being replaced with other terrain. He wandered for some time silent, and than said, "I wish that the terrain would stop changing everywhere!"
A sign appeared:

This is outside of your powers, you cannot do this. We appolegise for the inconvenince...

"So what can I do anywhay? Educate me?"
Suddenly, someone appeared. "Hello, I am a scientist! You asked to educate you!"
Quest: Keep the barbarian great scientist alive for a turnset and I will help you, but if he dies, I will randomly cause you and whoever killed him trouble. If you kill him, bad things will happen

Edits (please do them for me)

Spoiler :

Put a barbarian great scientist near his capital

 

[brandon.herren]

Added edits.

 

[MaxWar]

Ok, i am officially giving up this thread, its way too chaotic, you guys are plain evil. (may still lurk around though)
And Radio, may "god" save your soul...
I really do not think you will need any of my doing in order to lose this.

 

[thecaesar]

NFRE:

Spoiler :

Very well, Brandon, in stead of those two resources, place Helliphants! and copper.

 

[Caragus]

Carannys was walking to and fro among the people of the earth. And he didn't like what he saw. That dratted Bob. he thought I need to get rid of him. Then a devilish thought came into his mind.
Radio was sleeping, and as he slept he dreamed a dreamed. And in his dream, he saw a figure in a hood and cloak, which spoke to him. "Ah, Radio."
"Who are you?" Radio asked.
"Oh yes, I forget that you have never seen me. But I've seen you."
Radio said nothing, wondering what this spectral figure wanted with him. But he'd already guessed it wouldn't be something good.
"I am the god of......nice things and rewards." said the cloaked man. "And that praetorian, Bob, is getting on my nerves. Kill him, and you will get a very pleasant present. Fail......."
And the figure seemed to slip out of his dream, and Radio awoke.

Quest:

Spoiler :

Kill Bob.

 

[Lelouch]

NOOO! not Bob!

 

[brandon.herren]

added.

 

[Lelouch]

What did Bob ever do to you?

 

[thecaesar]

 

[strijder20]

No time for write-up, sorry.

Spoiler :

Changes: I added a rugged, forested continent to the south of Radio.