The Rules of Being a Man

[Winston Khan]

Thanks Ram, first posting always a bit of a bizarre one, I think I can follow it though...


RULE 6 ~ You must offer your coat when a lady is cold.

Some things never change. You must still presume that she is fragile and incapable of protecting herself.



Should it be raining during a walk home and you have the company of a lady you should walk on the outside of the footpath; to prevent her from being soaked by passing cars' spray from the roadside drain; all girls need to be protected and encouraged - (just like children?)

 

[Bartleby]

Real man drink wine only when there are no manly drinks like scotch or vodka around. Since they dont drink wine, real men would never have a corkscrew opener lying around, so real men only open wine bottle with screwdrivers or knives

In addition, Scotch should be drunk at 100° proof (57% vol.) if at all possible.

 

[Bozo Erectus]

In addition, Scotch should be drunk at 100° proof (57% vol.) if at all possible.

I agree and preferrably, directly from the bottle. Glasses are for sissies.

BTW, people are aware that Im joking throughout this thread, arent they?

 

[Whomp]

Bozo you're all good!

@ Ram I would contend that the job of "technofreak" is one of great importance and should not be taken lightly. If, for instance, a girly song comes on the radio (say Backstreet Boys or Muscrat Love) he is required by law to change the song within 2 seconds. If caught humming or singing said tuneage he should be relegated to "beatch" status for the rest of the trip.

 

[Rambuchan]

In addition, Scotch should be drunk at 100° proof (57% vol.) if at all possible.

Bart, This is the Rules of Being a Man, not the rules of being Gaelic.

@ Bozo: It cracks me up everytime someone comes in here (Stormbind was the last I think) and stamp their foot down and proudly inform us all that they "don't need anyone's rules to be a man". Gotta love it!

@ Winston: Yes your point about the side of the pavement is a good one. I'll put it in when I can be bothered.

 

[bigmeat]

Manowar is a sweet metal band

 

[Rambuchan]

Bozo you're all good!

@ Ram I would contend that the job of "technofreak" is one of great importance and should not be taken lightly. If, for instance, a girly song comes on the radio (say Backstreet Boys or Muscrat Love) he is required by law to change the song within 2 seconds. If caught humming or singing said tuneage he should be relegated to "beatch" status for the rest of the trip.

Yes I accept the role of "Technofreak" may sit uncomfortably with some. It's seems to be emerging more and more these days. When the Bill gets passed I think it stands every chance of having a qualifier slapped on that role. Thanks for pointing that out.

Oh and relegation to 'Beatch' can happen to anyone.

 

[classical_hero]

Should a Real Man always beep the horn at a beautiful woman?

 

[Bozo Erectus]

Its the polite thing to do. Shows your appreciation for all the trouble she went through to look nice.

 

[nonconformist]

I agree and preferrably, directly from the bottle. Glasses are for sissies.

BTW, people are aware that Im joking throughout this thread, arent they?

I must add that all spirits drunk must be done so while flaming, if at all possible.

 

[Bozo Erectus]

Flammable burps can only be a plus.

 

[nonconformist]

Flammable burps can only be a plus.

Ending up like This Guy only serves to enhance your manliness.

 

[Winston Khan]

When in control of the vehicle, cautious excess of speed has to be encouraged, the less time in the car the better right?

The 'DD' has the right to demand near anything of the passengers, unless there happens to be a girl passenger, in which case he may ask for anything!

 

[mrtn]

About the Wine issue I was thinking that if a man drinks wine this should be that special 1985 Bon Homme du Merde, i e he should be a compulsive collector that knows more about wine than anyone else present.

Drinking cheap Vin de Table is not manly.

 

[El Justo]

About the Wine issue I was thinking that if a man drinks wine this should be that special 1985 Bon Homme du Merde, i e he should be a compulsive collector that knows more about wine than anyone else present.

Drinking cheap Vin de Table is not manly.

i agree!

good point mrtn!

 

[Bozo Erectus]

I dont see how a real man could be a fancy schmancy wine collector. Maybe it could be permissable if turtlenecks were banned, the wine was actually drunk, instead of being swished around in the mouth and spit out. Also you cant keep the wine in a wine cellar, it would have to be kept in the garage in old crates. Even with all these precautions its really pushing the limits.

 

[El Justo]

it could be permissable if turtlenecks were banned

 

[Rambuchan]

This wine issue is really developing into an issue! I mean turtle necks and all that, wft?!

I'll have to pay some thought to it but my gut instinct is that beer and wine etc are all acceptable drinks for a man. Does it really matter how you store them or drink them? These 'rules' are designed to help those on shakey ground to make it to firmer manly territory. Whether you become a Bond type man or a slob type man is immaterial afai am concerned. That's up to you.

But clearly Baby Cham is out of the question .

 

[Bartleby]

Hey, I'd love a Babycham.

 

[Rambuchan]

:shakehead There is always one.