500 ways you know your computer sucks

Discussion in 'Humor & Jokes' started by ULTIMATEGP, May 25, 2006.

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  1. Eran of Arcadia

    Eran of Arcadia Stormin' Mormon Retired Moderator

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  2. BlizzardGR

    BlizzardGR Prince

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    219) You have a guarantee of zero dead mice for 3 months (not feeding them will void the quarantee).
     
  3. Souron

    Souron The Dark Lord

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    220) You keep a fire extinguisher by your desk for your computer.
     
  4. Yuri2356

    Yuri2356 Test Screening

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    221) Your PC was assembled by 20,000 hebrew slaves.
     
  5. Eran of Arcadia

    Eran of Arcadia Stormin' Mormon Retired Moderator

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  6. BCLG100

    BCLG100 Music Master

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    223-Your PC was assembled by Bill Gates
     
  7. Abaddon

    Abaddon Deity

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    223. You had to disassemble, reassemble your PC several times in the last week.
     
  8. MooManof_

    MooManof_ Official Guru of Weird

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    Someone's been reading Dilbert :mischief:
     
  9. Truronian

    Truronian Quite unfamiliar Retired Moderator

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    224. It tries to display surds as fractions
     
  10. Eran of Arcadia

    Eran of Arcadia Stormin' Mormon Retired Moderator

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    Well, yes, of course.

    225. Entire religions have been formed specifically prohibiting its use.
     
  11. Tycoon101

    Tycoon101 Loves being STRONG

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    :mischief: Well...

    226. The Pope of The Catholic Church has publically condemned your computer as a heresy.
     
  12. MooManof_

    MooManof_ Official Guru of Weird

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    227. Conversely, entire religions have been formed worshipping it.
     
  13. Blazer6

    Blazer6 King

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    228. You physically move the electricity from the electric company in a box and empty it into your computer.

    229. You draw faster on the monitor than its refresh rate.
     
  14. megalomaniac

    megalomaniac Push the red button!!

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    Check the numbers on your posts. There are two #223's
     
  15. ggganz

    ggganz a.k.a. The Scyphozoa

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    230. You turn it on and it turns on the light instead :)confused:) and then you turn off the light and the garage door opens instead :)eek:) and then you close the garage door and it turns on the sprinklers instead :)mad:) and then you turn off the sprinklers and it opens the windows instead :)wallbash:) and you close the windows and it turns on your computer instead ([pissed]) only to start a fire because the window was open and the sprinklers got the computer wet :)aargh:) and cost you $1.5 million :)suicide:).
     
  16. steviejay

    steviejay Now in Black and White!!

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    dude......... you've spent WAY too much time thinking about this..... either that or you're relating to a past memory, in which case my condolences ;)

    231: Your computer starts singing 'Daisy'
     
  17. Pentium

    Pentium Digital Matter

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    Happens if your computer sucks ;)
     
  18. ggganz

    ggganz a.k.a. The Scyphozoa

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    I've seen lots of commercials for OSH or Home Depot like that, and I just found this thread today.:rolleyes:
     
  19. ggganz

    ggganz a.k.a. The Scyphozoa

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    That should be a reason.
     
  20. Truronian

    Truronian Quite unfamiliar Retired Moderator

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    232. Your computer needs a DC wall socket
     
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