500 ways you know your computer sucks

[Perfection]

75. You accidentally taped "You Ain't Nothing but a Hound Dog" over your program.

 

[Mirc]

76: You spin the mouse wheel and the operating system tells you "Unknown Command! Please restart your computer"

 

[Tycoon101]

77. The BIOS setting screen has better graphics than your computer normally has.

 

[Perfection]

78. It's analog

 

[Souron]

79. It's mechanical

80. It looks something like this:

 

[3 EMS]

81. You just realised that your Sharpie is dried up and have to make an emergency trip to the store.

82. You just figured out how to write a program to draw your initial on a plotter.

 

[Genocidicbunny]

83. You need to compress a text document to fit it onto your harddrive

 

[Jafendel]

84. The robbers only steal your mouse pad and leave a Post-it note in monitor: "Hey, I wish i knew."

 

[WerBackIII]

85.The best game you can play is this-
~COMPUTER- 0 or 1
~if 0 write "win"
~if 1 write "lose"

 

[RameNoodle]

86. The only song your computer can download is... wait, that's the fan.

 

[Genocidicbunny]

87. You purchased it 3 years ago, and its still booting for the first time ever.

 

[Perfection]

88. It refuses to open the pod bay doors.

 

[Truronian]

89. You know the dial-up noise of by heart

 

[Genocidicbunny]

90. I has so many fans for cooling because its so old, that its louder in your room than on an airport runway

 

[Rossiya]

91. there are twenty four guinea pigs running in the wheels at the back of your computer, thus powering the whole system.

 

[Swiss Bezerker]

52. magenta, cyan, black and white are the only colors you can display

Not even Yellow!

92) you have to wind it up every 10 seconds.

 

[Eran of Arcadia]

92) you have to wind it up every 10 seconds.

93. You have to enter a sequence of numbers into it every 108 minutes or it goes berserk.

 

[Genocidicbunny]

94. Every time you want to run a new program, you have to switch out the gears. ( a la charles babbage's difference engine )

 

[Tycoon101]

95. Folding at Home involves your computer sputtering bianary code and gentics dealing with proteins all over the desktop.

 

[Truronian]

96. Your speakers look like this: