500 ways you know your computer sucks

Discussion in 'Humor & Jokes' started by ULTIMATEGP, May 25, 2006.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. MooManof_

    MooManof_ Official Guru of Weird

    Joined:
    May 7, 2006
    Messages:
    104
    Location:
    Here
    97. The Natural history museum and your PC's tech support people share staff and office space.
     
  2. megalomaniac

    megalomaniac Push the red button!!

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2005
    Messages:
    64
    Location:
    South Korea
    98. You've begun to listen to the dial-up noise as if it were music.
     
  3. salty mud

    salty mud Deity

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2006
    Messages:
    4,944
    Location:
    die Schweiz
    99. To find replacements for your computer you must go and dig them up.
     
  4. Truronian

    Truronian Quite unfamiliar Retired Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    9,869
    Location:
    Near Cornwall
    100: Your moniter is black and white
     
  5. salty mud

    salty mud Deity

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2006
    Messages:
    4,944
    Location:
    die Schweiz
    101. Your Great Grandad who was a Major-General in WWII co-ordinated attacks against the enemy on the comp
     
  6. MooManof_

    MooManof_ Official Guru of Weird

    Joined:
    May 7, 2006
    Messages:
    104
    Location:
    Here
    102. You dance to the 'music'... (I used to, when I was a kid :p)

    103. Your 'colour' moniter is Green on Black.
     
  7. Maniacal

    Maniacal the green Napoleon

    Joined:
    Mar 13, 2005
    Messages:
    18,778
    Location:
    British Columbia, Canada
    That's not nesecaraly to do with your computer quality. Ok, my computer is crap, but TELUS said we were getting highspeed, last Fall. (so glad my mom has cable).

    104. YOU have to ride a bike to power it and have the handlebars as the keyboard/mouse.
     
  8. Souron

    Souron The Dark Lord

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2003
    Messages:
    5,947
    Location:
    (GMT-5)
    105. Color on your monitor is determined by what plastic film you put over it.
     
  9. MooManof_

    MooManof_ Official Guru of Weird

    Joined:
    May 7, 2006
    Messages:
    104
    Location:
    Here
    106. You use coloured glass plates, because plastic wasn't around when your PC was built.
     
  10. Truronian

    Truronian Quite unfamiliar Retired Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    9,869
    Location:
    Near Cornwall
    107. Your printer uses various crushed flowers for ink
     
  11. Ultima Dragoon

    Ultima Dragoon FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2005
    Messages:
    2,369
    Location:
    Behind the east wind
    108. Your internet loads faster than your comp.
     
  12. Heretic_Cata

    Heretic_Cata We're gonna live forever

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2005
    Messages:
    9,587
    Location:
    Romania
    Lots of stuff posted apply to my comp.

    109. Your mouse looks like this.
     
  13. megalomaniac

    megalomaniac Push the red button!!

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2005
    Messages:
    64
    Location:
    South Korea
    110. Windows 3.x is too advanced for your machine
     
  14. MooManof_

    MooManof_ Official Guru of Weird

    Joined:
    May 7, 2006
    Messages:
    104
    Location:
    Here
    111. You find yourself drooling over the 'advanced' features of Minix.
     
  15. The 777 Hoax

    The 777 Hoax future skeleton

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2005
    Messages:
    1,599
    Location:
    ohio
    112. It has a picture of an apple on it.

    :p
     
  16. Perfection

    Perfection The Great Head.

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2002
    Messages:
    49,825
    Location:
    Salisbury Plain
    113. The drawing program consists of translucent pieces of plastic and a black sheet of paper.
     
  17. Genocidicbunny

    Genocidicbunny Bug squasher

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Messages:
    5,473
    Location:
    Orange Town
    114. It looks like a fridge
     
  18. Genocidicbunny

    Genocidicbunny Bug squasher

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Messages:
    5,473
    Location:
    Orange Town
    115. The clicks it makes can be used as music.


    --internet was being a b***h...
     
  19. MooManof_

    MooManof_ Official Guru of Weird

    Joined:
    May 7, 2006
    Messages:
    104
    Location:
    Here
    Because of stickciv's double post, I'll let him take the 115 slot...

    116. Your PC is really just a fridge with an apple-shaped magnet on it, and your keyboard it just fridge-magnet letters.

    117. You still can't find where to plug the mouse into your fridge, and it starts squeaking and trying to bite you.
     
  20. Truronian

    Truronian Quite unfamiliar Retired Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    9,869
    Location:
    Near Cornwall
    118. It can't handle the concept of a roller-ball mouse
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page