500 ways you know your computer sucks

[carmen510]

618. God used it and it kept crashing, so he decided to declare it a sin to use it, and curse those who do by crashing it to make them learn a lesson.
619. Adam and Eve used it, so they ate the apple to calm their nerves.
620. Satanists (Not athiests) worship it.
621. This is in accordance to a lost commandment, thou shalt not use a computer.

 

[Love]

#622 it was the computer who caused the big bang when it crashed one time

 

[Swedishguy]

#623 It is so big, it makes a supernova small.

 

[Hitti-Litti]

#623 It is so big, it makes a supernova small.

Which means that the screen is so small that word supernova can't fit in it.

 

[Swedishguy]

Huh? I don't follow you.

 

[Love]

I do

#624 The small letter i cant fit in the screen

 

[Swedishguy]

#625 A whole website puts their energy in your computer.

 

[Xanikk999]

The computers RAM size is so small that displaying one letter of text on a black screen in dos causes it to crash!

 

[Swedishguy]

#625 it can't even display black!

 

[Love]

#626 the computer has 0,00000001 bytes in RAM

 

[Swedishguy]

#627 It Anti-works!

 

[NikNaks]

Assuming post #508 is number 626:

#627 It Anti-works!

#630 It doesn't work at all!

 

[Swedishguy]

#631 All electronic appliances stop working nearby it!

 

[NikNaks]

#632 It causes all energy around it to stop, wither and die.

 

[Swedishguy]

And resurrect! What an old computer!

 

[Xanikk999]

The computer is made of cardboard and has a monkey inside of it holding up pictures to the cutout space and making noises!!!!

 

[Swedishguy]

#634 the monkey is very very old!

 

[sepamu92]

#635: The monkey is fossilized

 

[carmen510]

636. The monkey is actually a small velociraptor.
637. The computer is the god of all things evil.

 

[Hitti-Litti]

638. The computer was before God