All Things Harry Potter

[choxorn]

e.g. no sexual education

Sexual education at Hogwarts obviously consists of occasional visits to the nurse's office for the spell to cure Wizard Herpes or do magic abortions

 

[Valka D'Ur]

I bet you five internet cookies that one of the fanfics is a demonstration of Rule 34.

M-kay... There are over 830,000 stories on fanfiction.net. There are probably millions more around the internet, on various sites (fanfiction.net, AO3, and Wattpad are the ones I'm most familiar with).

I just did a search on fanfiction.net for stories in which the Sorting Hat is tagged as a character, using "all" for the ratings criteria (so anything rated "mature" would be included).

There are 499 hits. Not all of them are in English. I'm not going to read them all right now, but if you want to have a look for yourself, here's the link: Sorting Hat stories on ff.net

But you've just given me an idea for an absolutely ridiculous story.

I thought the Federation was consistent in red bussard collectors and, when present, blue on the body of the nacelles. Klingon and Romulan was green instead of blue, and some Klingon ships had red bussard collectors.

Though a lot of the alien ships got rather lazy about having distinct nacelles as the show went on, which I'm mildly grumpy about. At least the Vulcan annular warp engine was cool looking.

Not that I really want to sidetrack into Star Trek (there's a thread for that), but my point is that some details are too trivial to affect my enjoyment of a series. As long as the eye color matches, I don't care what color it is.

Well, teenagers are not that likeable to anyone other than their immediate family and/or coetaneous. In that they're portrayed quite accurately. Especially with them being a few hundred magically capable idiots cooped up together with, e.g. no sexual education or any sort of emotional support after being wrenched from their families, which is a type of damage victims of the boarding school system have to endure IRL.

One thing I noticed was that there are an awful lot of characters who had abusive or otherwise negative aspects to their childhood experiences - experiences that happened at home, rather than at school.

I have to admit that boarding school isn't something I'd want to experience. I would imagine that one of the things kids are supposed to get out of it is a greater sense of self-reliance, since they're not around their parents much.

 

[Valka D'Ur]

Sexual education at Hogwarts obviously consists of occasional visits to the nurse's office for the spell to cure Wizard Herpes or do magic abortions

That's not the impression I got, even from some of the more violent or risque stories. There are a couple of stories that mention a contraception spell.

Kids don't go to Hogwarts until they're 11. Dunno about you, but the first sex-ed class in the public school system I attended was in Grade 6, when most kids are 11. I have no idea about how the British schools handle this sort of thing, but it seems reasonable to assume that the kids in HP would have varied amounts of information available to them, depending on what they might have learned from their parents and whatever pre-Hogwarts education they might have had.

The only character who mentions extreme misgivings about having children is Remus, because of his fear that any children he fathered would inherit lycanthropy from him.

 

[Takhisis]

The only character who mentions extreme misgivings about having children is Remus, because of his fear that any children he fathered would inherit lycanthropy from him.

This was, apparently, a coded reference to AIDS IIRC.

 

[Valka D'Ur]

This was, apparently, a coded reference to AIDS IIRC.

Yep. But I choose to enjoy the story as a story, as well.

 

[Takhisis]

Me too! It's like all those people who keep doing eisegesis of what The Matrix could really have meant.

 

[tjs282]

those people who keep doing eisegesis of what The Matrix could really have meant.

Fairly boilerplate messiah/saviour parable, innit?

(Much like HP, actually...)

 

[Takhisis]

No, no, just don't go into it. It's the wrong thread.

although we totally could have a Matrix thread

 

[Valka D'Ur]

No, no, just don't go into it. It's the wrong thread.

although we totally could have a Matrix thread

Yes, please don't sidetrack this into Matrix stuff. If you enjoy discussing those movies, please go ahead and start a thread for them.


I've been watching some YT reaction videos by people who say they're watching the HP movies for the first time. They're all over the map in terms of tolerability (my tolerance for the presenter). Some presenters seem to just want to talk about themselves, and others tend to do hammy, over-the-top reactions.

And then there's a guy named Osman who seems... I really don't know how to describe him. He's enthusiastic, funny (when Dumbledore says "wands out, Harry," Osman quickly takes out his own plastic replica wand and waits for Dumbledore's next order ( ), and just plain weird (in a cheerful way). One thing that watching these videos really brings home is how much of the novels were left out of the movies and that's why parts of them were so confusing. It's odd how so many of them immediately conclude that seeing Remus on the train and being told that he's the next DADA teacher means he's one of the bad guys.

 

[W|M]

It's odd how so many of them immediately conclude that seeing Remus on the train and being told that he's the next DADA teacher means he's one of the bad guys.

it makes sense considering every other DADA professor in the series is an antagonist

 

[tjs282]

No, no, just don't go into it. It's the wrong thread.

Yes, please don't sidetrack this into Matrix stuff. If you enjoy discussing those movies, please go ahead and start a thread for them.

Don't worry, wasn't planning on any such sidetrack.

IIRC, Takh doesn't acknowledge the existence of any Matrix sequels anyway, so any such conversation would be quite... short...

Out of curiosity, have the Fantastic Beasts movies been screened yet, somewhere (either of) you could watch them?

it makes sense considering every other DADA professor in the series is an antagonist

But someone would only know that, if they'd read all the books before they saw the movies. And Valka's description would suggest that those YT-ers hadn't (because otherwise they would know who and what Lupin is).

Someone watching the movies in order for the first time, without having read the books, has only met Professors Quirrell (yeah, OK, definitely an antagonist, even though both the book and movie blatantly red-herring Snape as the villain) and Lockhart (who, apart from trying to zap H+R with a Memory Charm just before they entered the Chamber, wasn't really the antagonist of CoS).

I would say the more noticeably consistency from the first 2 movies is Snape's hostility to Harry + co. It's a while since I last watched PoA, though, so I can't remember if that movie makes it clear that he's also hostile to Remus (which, you would have thought, would be a clear implication that Lupin is a goodie!).

 

[Takhisis]

Snape being hostile to someone isn't an implication that he's ‘a goodie’. Snape is hostile to nearly everyone.

 

[choxorn]

Someone watching the movies in order for the first time, without having read the books, has only met Professors Quirrell (yeah, OK, definitely an antagonist, even though both the book and movie blatantly red-herring Snape as the villain) and Lockhart (who, apart from trying to zap H+R with a Memory Charm just before they entered the Chamber, wasn't really the antagonist of CoS).

That is at least a pattern of it's been true the last two times, might be true the third time as well, right?

And it definitely holds true after that, when we get secretly a death eater, an authoritarian bully who later happily goes along with it when the death eaters take over, secretly not a death eater, and a death eater who's making no attempt at hiding it.

 

[Buster's Uncle]

...Thought that was a political metaphor at first...

 

[Valka D'Ur]

Don't worry, wasn't planning on any such sidetrack.

IIRC, Takh doesn't acknowledge the existence of any Matrix sequels anyway, so any such conversation would be quite... short...

Okay.

Out of curiosity, have the Fantastic Beasts movies been screened yet, somewhere (either of) you could watch them?

I haven't seen them. I don't know if it's ever been shown on the science fiction channel here. I do know that it isn't part of the movie marathons they show on long holiday weekends.

Most people who have commented on the YT videos I watch or posted comments on the fanfic sites have said that while the movies expand the HP universe somewhat, they're not very good. The general consensus of The Cursed Child is that it's utter crap.

There is a sizeable number of fans who have posted comments that they would absolutely love a Marauders-era movie (would actually take a series to do it proper justice, as there are 6 main characters to follow - James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, Lily, and Snape, plus an assortment of other family, friends, parents, and teachers). Fandom is divided into three general groups concerning Wolfstar (the fanon that Sirius and Remus are a couple): those who are for it, those who are against it, and those who just want to see those two characters happy somehow, given the difficult life experiences they've had).

But someone would only know that, if they'd read all the books before they saw the movies. And Valka's description would suggest that those YT-ers hadn't (because otherwise they would know who and what Lupin is).

Someone watching the movies in order for the first time, without having read the books, has only met Professors Quirrell (yeah, OK, definitely an antagonist, even though both the book and movie blatantly red-herring Snape as the villain) and Lockhart (who, apart from trying to zap H+R with a Memory Charm just before they entered the Chamber, wasn't really the antagonist of CoS).

I would say the more noticeably consistency from the first 2 movies is Snape's hostility to Harry + co. It's a while since I last watched PoA, though, so I can't remember if that movie makes it clear that he's also hostile to Remus (which, you would have thought, would be a clear implication that Lupin is a goodie!).

Lockhart isn't guilty of anything other than being an egotistical, vain, selfish, pompous, cowardly, incompetent jackass (plus trying to wipe the kids' memories so they won't tell on him).

Snape is hostile to Harry because of Harry's strong resemblance to James, who along with the other Marauders bullied Snape on a fairly frequent basis (Snape's no angel; he did his fair share of bullying). Snape has never forgotten nor forgiven any of them.

Here is the part of the Prisoner of Azkaban movie that shows Snape interacting with the surviving Marauders when they prove Sirius' innocence:

Shrieking Shack Part 1:

Shrieking Shack Part 2:

This sequence of events continues with them all returning to the castle; Sirius asks Harry to live with him after he's cleared, Harry's ecstatic at the idea of having a real home with someone who actually loves him... but it all depends on proving Peter is alive. Unfortunately, Peter escapes in the confusion when Remus transforms into a werewolf (he forgot to take his potion when he realized that the kids, Peter, and Sirius were all in the Shrieking Shack). Sirius is captured and the intention is that he be given over to the Dementors.

Snape being hostile to someone isn't an implication that he's ‘a goodie’. Snape is hostile to nearly everyone.

I'm trying to think of anyone to whom Snape was never hostile. I can't think of anyone. He was even hostile to Lily, calling her "Mudblood."

That is at least a pattern of it's been true the last two times, might be true the third time as well, right?

And it definitely holds true after that, when we get secretly a death eater, an authoritarian bully who later happily goes along with it when the death eaters take over, secretly not a death eater, and a death eater who's making no attempt at hiding it.

Hm. We have:

Quirrell (villain)
Lockhart (pompous, incompetent idiot)
Lupin (the only good one of the lot)
Mad-Eye Moody (turned out to be an imposter)
Umbridge (villain)
Snape
? I don't recall who the DADA teacher was in the 7th year; was it Snape or someone else?

 

[choxorn]

I don't recall who the DADA teacher was in the 7th year; was it Snape or someone else?

Amycus Carrow, I think? Some fairly minor Death Eater. Most of the book isn't set at Hogwarts so it's only mentioned briefly at the very end.

Snape was the headmaster that year, that I remember.

 

[tjs282]

Snape being hostile to someone isn't an implication that he's ‘a goodie’. Snape is hostile to nearly everyone.

We see his hostility to nearly all the students (except the Slytherins = bad sign), but not generally the staff. So I'll refine that point: in the context of Snape being presented as a 'baddie' (in movies 1 + 2, not taking later movies which haven't been watched yet into account), any adult he's also obviously resentful towards, might be assumed to be sympathetic.

Though I can't remember if any of the movies prior to OotP ever specifically mention Snape's wish to be DADA Professor, and hence his automatic resentment towards anyone else who got that job? (I'd have to watch the movies again to see if Rickman manages to convey that non-verbally, e.g. by obviously sneering at the current incumbent behind their back)

Amycus Carrow, I think? Some fairly minor Death Eater.

Yes, along with his sister-whose-name-I-can't-remember (Alecto?). Except by then it was just the Dark Arts, no Defence.

 

[choxorn]

Though I can't remember if any of the movies prior to OotP ever specifically mention Snape's wish to be DADA Professor, and hence his automatic resentment towards anyone else who got that job? (I'd have to watch the movies again to see if Rickman manages to convey that non-verbally, e.g. by obviously sneering at the current incumbent behind their back)

He clearly dislikes at least Lupin, Lockhart, and Umbridge, but his enmity towards Lupin goes back to well before he was teaching DADA, and pretty much everyone comes to dislike Lockhart and Umbridge.

Yes, along with his sister-whose-name-I-can't-remember (Alecto?). Except by then it was just the Dark Arts, no Defence.

Right, though she was teaching Muggle Studies, or rather "I'm here to redpill you all about how all Muggles are subhuman scum and only pure wizards are real wizards"

 

[Takhisis]

Lockhart isn't guilty of anything other than being an egotistical, vain, selfish, pompous, cowardly, incompetent jackass (plus trying to wipe the kids' memories so they won't tell on him).

Actually he's also guilty of theft, fraud, embezzlement, grievous bodily harm (memory modifications) that we know of, as well as the attempted permanent incapacitation of Harry and Ron and leaving Ginny for dead in the second book, the last of which would actually count as murder, y'know.

Most people who have commented on the YT videos I watch or posted comments on the fanfic sites have said that while the movies expand the HP universe somewhat, they're not very good. The general consensus of The Cursed Child is that it's utter crap.

The Cursed Child might stand on its own as good-ish if it a) didn't have all the stage directions marking Death Eaters as evil by specifically styling them as the tiresome cliché of Nazis and b) didn't have all those attempts at being patched in as HP continuity: as its own work it might just be a Terminator ripoff/homage.

We see his hostility to nearly all the students (except the Slytherins = bad sign), but not generally the staff. So I'll refine that point: in the context of Snape being presented as a 'baddie' (in movies 1 + 2, not taking later movies which haven't been watched yet into account), any adult he's also obviously resentful towards, might be assumed to be sympathetic.

With the exception of Professor Lockhart…

Though I can't remember if any of the movies prior to OotP ever specifically mention Snape's wish to be DADA Professor, and hence his automatic resentment towards anyone else who got that job? (I'd have to watch the movies again to see if Rickman manages to convey that non-verbally, e.g. by obviously sneering at the current incumbent behind their back)

First book, in the feast after the Sorting:
‘No wonder [Quirrell] is looking so nervous, that's Professor Snape. He teaches Potions, bu he doesn't wanto to – everyone knows he's after Quirrell's job. Knows an awful lot about the Dark Arts, Snape.’

 

[Valka D'Ur]

Actually he's also guilty of theft, fraud, embezzlement, grievous bodily harm (memory modifications) that we know of, as well as the attempted permanent incapacitation of Harry and Ron and leaving Ginny for dead in the second book, the last of which would actually count as murder, y'know.

Okay, I forgot about him doing all that to the wizards whose achievements Lockhart took credit for. I'm going to have to re-read the second book.

Chamber of Secrets sparked a weird fanfic in which the rest of the Weasley family is put under a spell (Imperius, I think) to believe Ginny guilty of working with Voldemort, and she's tossed into Azkaban (yes, at that tender age!). She meets Sirius, who is outraged that the Ministry would sentence a child to Azakaban for any reason. So in an AU of the original timeline, Sirius realizes that for Ginny's sake (and Harry's, as Ginny fills him in on what she knows of Harry's life), he needs to figure out how to escape. So they do, and become fugitives as he takes on a guardian/mentor role with her. This story introduces the concept of black market wands, as Sirius (who can still access his Gringotts vault) goes to Olivander and tells him that he and Ginny need new wands - the untraceable kind, that cost extra. Olivander doesn't care about their fugitive status; as always, his concern is matching the wand to the right wizard/witch.