Comedy facebook status suggestions

[Mise]

One of my hobbies is to put "interesting" facebook statuses, rather than the typical "is watching TV", or "has new socks", or "just booked a holiday!". I rather favoured things like, "went there", or "has played knifey-spoony before", or "has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down", or "failed the Turing test", or "lost the Pepsi challenge".

But I've run out. Now, you may not think they're funny, but I do

What comedy facebook statuses have you had? What comedy facebook statuses can you think of?

 

[cFccFc]

*name* isn't ?

 

[puglover]

"Joe is."

It's so enlightened.

 

[Mise]

They've both been done man! The weirder the better! (Or, like, interesting grammatical quirks. They're cool too. "is." and "isn't." both fall into these categories, but are kinda overdone )

 

[Catharsis]

Joe Bloggs thinks, therefore he is.

Joe Bloggs is only one index finger away from an entire girlfriend.

Joe Bloggs is moving forwards through time at an alarming rate.

Joe Bloggs is making kissy-faces at his own Facebook picture RIGHT NOW

 

[Mise]

they're great!

 

[cFccFc]

Joe has his name beeing read by you ?

nah thats crap.

Joe Blogg is in your mind. Thats better

 

[puglover]

Joe is making the Internet eight words longer!

 

[warpus]

why would i give these away?

i'm using them myself!

 

[Mise]

why would i give these away?

i'm using them myself!

Share the love man! No-one'll know that some guy thousands of miles away is also using it -- we're separated by six people!