I agree with pindicator. I think we should respond with something regarding our capabilities. We're hoping to learn how to become more bureaucratic to speed up our research but we haven't figured it out yet.
Hello Leader,
We're happy to hear that you're so close to learning project code ABC. We've noticed that the Oracle has provided your captial with some magnificent means of generating more gold and hammers. We heard it's called Burea...something.
Project metal metaling is coming along and we hope to provide it soon. We've had some problems as you know with the loss of one of our feared warriors and the infidel barbarians continue to be an annoyance. We're eradicating the problem as fast as we can.
Will you be sending project ABC when you're finished?
Sincerely,
Pifflenatress
Dear Leader,
We hear rumors of letters and words being developed of a far-away land and are perplexed at the thought. Are not <Bird> <Cat Drinking Water> <Empire State Building> <Hot Babe Driving Convertable> clear enough in their intentions? Does not your Confucious say "Men's natures are alike, it is their habits that carry them far apart"? As both of our natures are true to fulfill the means of our bargain, we are working towards that end, but I think our people are not quite as adept as shuffling papers as yours. Perhaps you could send a few of your rumored "scientists" to help us complete the endeavor. We hear their knowledge is illuminating.
Habitually Yours,
Pifflenatress
General_W said:Dear Tubby and all Piffle People,
Yes – at first we were quite puzzled when the Oracle starting spouting all kinds of senseless legal jargon and endless regulations for performing common sense tasks… but it seems to have boosted production in Epsilon Eridani, so we decided to let it continue (although some of us suspect that these productivity gains are just an accounting trick).
If you can let us know when you expect to finish Metal Casting, we'll send you writing on faith, and then we can trade alphabet straight across for Metal Casting – with you reciprocating the good faith that we'll make the 30 good either in gold or another trade as soon as possible.
How does that sound?
Sincerely,
General_W, Servant of the Leader
Epsilon Team!
Dear General_W,
Perhaps you could send some of your number fudgers over to help our accountants out? Ours, unfortunately, are snobbish and effete about their profession: they squabble about balanced budgets, over-spending in government, transparency, privacy protection, FDIC insurance, IRAs, 401ks, and other acronyms that frankly annoy those of us that just want to see it done. We are quite eager to fulfill our end of the deal, and I tell our accountants to "Get 'er done!" daily but my southern drawl is not what it used to be.
I hear your people are far more refined in matters of this science. I could see an exchange program being beneficial: your learned citizens coming to our country in order to illuminate our technological endeavors while our squabbling number-crunchers would find solace in the bureaus and wardrobes of Epsilon.
Counting the Days,
Pifflenatress
pindicator said:Well, would getting writing right away be worthwhile? Sure, having it is better than not having it, but having it 10 turns earlier won't do us any good if we don't start a library/open borders, etc until after we have Metal Casting anyway.
pindicator said:Think White House press secretary, but actually done with some skill.
Dear Tubby and all the glorious Piffles,
This letter is to follow up on my last letter (Sent to Tubby on 10/19) and to explore some further options.
We're pleased to let you know that we now understand the secret of Alphabet, and we are therefore eagerly looking forward to our agreed trade for Metal Casting. Please let us know when you plan to get Metal Casting. As soon as we have word from you, we'll be happy to transfer the knowledge of Writing in good faith, and then we can swap Metal for Alpha straight across.
As per our agreement, this still leaves us owing you 30 beakers. We are, of course, happy to pay this sum as soon as it's possible – but we also have another idea we think you may like. What if we taught you the secret of thinking deep religious thoughts and then about how to get people to support those that think the deep religious thoughts? (Meditation 80 and Priesthood 60 ). In exchange, you could teach us to build walls and catch yummy things in the water. (Masonry 80 and Fishing 40 ) That still leaves us with a slight advantage – but we hope you may be interested as this brings our trade deficit much closer to even much sooner.
Looking forward to hearing what you think!
Hope all is well in Piffledom.
Sincerely,
General_W, Servant of the Leader
Epsilon Team!