Getting women to like you?

[Rhymes]

Everybody likes geeks, without them I would never know what the teacher said when I didn't go to the courses last week.
Being geek doesn't mean you cant be succesfull in relations, university chicks often fall for the wise guy with ambitious future.

 

[toh6wy]

I've never gotten a girl/woman to like me in that sense either. (To my knowledge, at least) In middle school there were one or two girls who I eventually found out had crushes on me, but I don't think that exactly counts.

But thank goodness I *have* gotten a few girls/women to like me in the other sense - as friends or friendly acquantainces! Otherwise I'd probably go insane. There's something I get out of female friends that no number of male friends can match - even if I hardly ever see them or don't know them very well. I think it's the prospect in my mind that maybe, just maybe, one of them will eventually come to like me enough to be my g/f, or even just a really good friend (one who'd I'd actually arrange to see outside of school, basically)

 

[Immortal]

you don't find a gf because you are a geek but inspite of being a geek.

You're painting the female species with a pretty broad brush there fellah.

 

[betazed]

You're painting the female species with a pretty broad brush there fellah.

maybe I got a bit carried away.

but seriously, i think i am essentially right. I probably have about 20 data points. And in none of them was geekiness of the guy the attractive factor (and in quite a few cases a hindrance). There might be a dream girl somewhere who is on the lookout for geeks, but frankly I haven't met her. Neither has anyone I know.

It must be because of the way their (i mean girl's) brains are wired.

 

[Global Nexus]

Eh, I've had some girls who liked me despite my being incredibly lacking in confidence. ^^; I think it's because I'm really, really nice to them even when said girls screw up badly. But nothing has worked out yet...

 

[The Last Conformist]

but seriously, i think i am essentially right. I probably have about 20 data points. And in none of them was geekiness of the guy the attractive factor (and in quite a few cases a hindrance). There might be a dream girl somewhere who is on the lookout for geeks, but frankly I haven't met her. Neither has anyone I know.

As I said in the other thread, there's a few out there. I've met a couple (one of them being my sister, which isn't much help!).

 

[Immortal]

Depends on what constitutes a "geek". If its the stereotypical computer loving, science fiction reading, quiet guy, it won't really matter as long as you are nice.

But if you are a smelly, rude, obnoxious nerd who always thinks hes right, yes you will have relationship issues.

Oh who am I kidding, the last time I had a relationship last longer than the morning was high school

 

[HamaticBabylon]

Girls/Women love a man who can order them around and tell them what to do! Not in a arrogant way but in a charming way…if you catch my drift!

 

[Immortal]

Girls/Women love a man who can order them around and tell them what to do! Not in a arrogant way but in a charming way…if you catch my drift!

Its not the ordering around part, its the decisiveness.

 

[The Last Conformist]

Depends on what constitutes a "geek". If its the stereotypical computer loving, science fiction reading, quiet guy, it won't really matter as long as you are nice.

But if you are a smelly, rude, obnoxious nerd who always thinks hes right, yes you will have relationship issues.

I'm using "geek" to mean the first kind.

 

[Akka]

Getting women to like you?

That, my friend, is probably the most sought-out knowledge in the world since man appeared.

But be confident. It's not because we've still not found in seven millions years, that we can't find tomorrow

 

[Rhymes]

Eh, I've had some girls who liked me despite my being incredibly lacking in confidence. ^^; I think it's because I'm really, really nice to them even when said girls screw up badly. But nothing has worked out yet...

Your probably one the cases of Very Handsome/no confidence persons. I have a friend like this, right now he's sleeping with 3 different girls each week but can never keep a relation to last more than, ...... a single night?

 

[betazed]

As I said in the other thread, there's a few out there. I've met a couple (one of them being my sister, which isn't much help!).

right. and like you said in the other thread the competition for them is so great that you are better off assuming that they do not exist. you have better chances that way.

As for your sister you might want to find something out. Granted she is a geek. but does she look for geekiness when she is trying to find a b/f. It is quite probable that she actually would want her b/f not to be a geek. being a geek and wanting a geek in your b/g/g/f are different.

 

[HamaticBabylon]

Its not the ordering around part, its the decisiveness.

You wouldn’t happen to be a girl would you?? *hinds behind The Last Conformist*

 

[The Last Conformist]

As for your sister you might want to find something out. Granted she is a geek. but does she look for geekiness when she is trying to find a b/f. It is quite probable that she actually would want her b/f not to be a geek. being a geek and wanting a geek in your b/g/g/f are different.

Did I say she's a geek? I don't think she is one. If I'd assign her a subcultrual label, it would be "goth".

She's certainly less geeky than me, and I like to think I'm only very moderately geeky!

Her bfs have been major geeks, tho, and I doubt that's coincidence. Perhaps her "dream prince" wouldn't be one, but the men she ends up dating are geeks, and that's what matters practically, isn't it?

 

[Immortal]

You wouldn’t happen to be a girl would you?? *hinds behind The Last Conformist*

Was it you or PontiuthPilate that has asked this before? I remember in one thread I called myself a slut and it erupted into a strange conversation about gender issues, CurtSibling was there.

 

[The Last Conformist]

@Immortal: I don't know if that's teh thread you're refering to, but I remember one where I and some other people had assumed you were a woman based on your avatar.

For some reason, my brain does not want to accept that the people most likely to have pretty women for their avatars are men. Wishful thinking, I guess.

 

[Immortal]

That's not the one, I remember that.

That was when I had Carly Pope for the avatar. Now I have Cabbadillo .

 

[Mark1031]

I've never gotten a girl/woman to like me in that sense either. (To my knowledge, at least) In middle school there were one or two girls who I eventually found out had crushes on me, but I don't think that exactly counts.

Aah but you see the crushes do count. This is the key, figuring out who likes you and then picking the ones you like back. I am a totally average looking wimpy guy who doesn’t dress particularly well. The last place I worked I found out when I was leaving that 5 women there had a crush on me (well one I knew already because I married her). That was ½ of the women there, and 3 were real hotties. I only picked up on 2 of the 5. The point is that I would hazard to guess that all you guys out there have some women/girl you know right now who has a crush on you. Picking up on it and then if you like her back acting on it is the key. I don’t think you have to change yourself (unless you have some serious social/emotional problem). The alternative is to just ask out everyone you like until you hit the ones that like you back but I find it too painful to deal with that much rejection.

 

[Mark1031]

There might be a dream girl somewhere who is on the lookout for geeks, but frankly I haven't met her. Neither has anyone I know.

I married her . Well what do you mean by geek (It’s not like I have a pocket protector and pants too short)? But if you mean guys who are into technical/science stuff aren’t trendy dressers, are a bit shy and don’t exude arrogant self-confidence, then yes geekiness is a requirement for her.