Welcome back to GordIOT, you bloody dumbo! I see you've all made some incredibly, questionable, decisions. Well, you all know the drill. Let's take a look at how you've all improved and see who's going home.
First off, we'll be looking at the one and only Polish-run Skeletoni's Italian Eatery. Keeping their prices incredibly low, they've improved food quality by bringing in a few new cooks and digging up some old recipes made by the man, the myth, the legend, Skeletoni. The new ingredients added lead to a bone-chillingly good experience. The additions of the skeleton themed tables seem to be working well, although they've discovered marinara sauce doesn't come out of bones well.
A mystery to all, Chef Bombshoo still has made no improvement to his restaurant. Some believe this may be a strange marketing ploy, but no one can know for sure.
Over at Hot Pocket Heroes, owner Crezth has interestingly enough increased the amount they are spending on food to bring only the best top ramen to the table. When asked about his restaurant, Crezth only responded with two words. "TOP ramen." While the improvements to food quality have helped, the small additions to appearance and advertising have equally boosted the restaurant's income, proving to make Hot Pocket Heroes more welcoming.
The Baron's Steakhouse has also undergone some cosmetic renovations, with the aesthetic leaning closer to a British hunting lodge. This vibe is bringing in a new clientele, one with more money to spend, and thus the logical decision owner Baron Ludwig von Nuka-tan has chosen is to up the prices and up the portions. Business is currently booming, as these decisions have proven to be good ones.
The owner of Cantina Sunrise, El Terrance, seems to have taken some very strange paths in advertising and food choices. Their partnership with local foodie blogger Seamus Stoner has brought both a new range of fresh ingredients and a new selection of self-proclaimed foodie customers. The second story seating additions and a prosperous food truck have helped business, enough to warrant a price increase for their most premium menu items.
Since we last saw The Whale's Gullet, not much has changed. Their fishy premise is still, at best, fishy. The additions to seating that they have made to the restaurant have allowed more customers to come in, which is always a good thing. However, the poor food quality is still quite poor. I'm uncertain how they've managed to use marketing and appearance to bolster their rotten fish, but they've certainly done it.
Alright, let's hope the second half of the restaurants are better. Chef Sumde's INFECTED! is still the flashiest in the business, and might market to the lowest common denominator of restaurateurs, but it does what it does well. Zombies are sweeping the nation metaphorically thankfully, and Sumde has found his niche well.
A bit of a surprise, Shinobi no Resutoran has recently shot up from one of the smallest to one of the largest restaurants in the competition, much like Americans in the global weight scale. Word has also gotten out that the location exists, and the customers that the news has attracted have been pleasantly surprised by the exotic food and low prices.
Another interesting case, NinjaCow64's Emiya Kitchen has also profited off of a incredibly strange and at face value, downright horrid business model. Analysts are baffled by how the tactic only described as "Minmaxing" has carried the restaurant so far. It's quite frankly a rookie mistake, but it's magically worked. The food is gourmet level, but everything else about the restaurant is third world.
Delhi Delights is another example of a restaurant that has expanded faster than a rash. With the increase in size has come an increase in price, which seems to be the ultimate money making strategy. Their food is a bit short of a "delight", with the Paneer Tikka still being blander than a Brit's humor. Luckily, improvement is the name of the game, and owner Muhammad Singh is confident the restaurant is headed in the right direction.
Last up we have Guru Gurra's All-You-Can-Eat Fruititarian Buffet, which is more of a mouthful than their portions. Despite being a buffet, the prices are so high that you'd get more bang for your buck off a kids menu. They could easily bounce back by increasing their food quality to meet their prices, but we shall see how they do.
It shouldn't come to a surprise to anyone who the one going home this week is. Pack your bags, post, as you are the one going home this round. Don't be like him folks, and show some improvement!
Player Food Quality Appearance Advertizing Size Price Points Available
KaiserElectric 8 5 3 4 1 10
Crezth 7 3 2 2 8 8
Nuka-Sama 6 6 2 4 3 8
Terrance888 11 3 2 4 3 11
Tuxedoham 2 5 3 5 8 10
Inthesomeday 5 7 2 3 5 9
Omega124 8 3 3 6 2 7
NinjaCow64 18 1 1 1 1 8
Jackelgull 6 4 3 5 4 7
Gurra09 4 4 2 3 9 9
