I can sympathize. Once in HS Spanish class (this would be in 1997), I got burned by grease as we were making some sort of dish; the things were literally popping in the pan after a few minutes. I got a whole bunch of grease splashed on the side of my neck. The next few days my friends were teasing me about "who gave you that hickey?" and so on.
While my earler rant really was truly random and bizarre, Fort Wayne truly is, without a doubt, Suburban Hell. There are NO sidewalks outside of the subdivisions, there is NO city center (there is a downtown, but that's not the center of anything, except traffic lights and banks), every place in town is approximately five miles down the road from anywhere else you might want to go; in general, there is simply no rhyme or reason to the place. Just to illustrate, you literally cannot travel straight down some streets without them changing name on you for no good reason. You travel down Washington Center Road, keep going straight at the intersection with Clinton Street, but are you still traveling on Washington Center Road? No, you're now on St. Joe Center Road.
Technically, we do have mass transit, consisting of bus service, but A) the buses are not reliable, B) there do not appear to be any set bus routes, and C) they never go any place you might want to get to anyways. Biking is not safe, as there are again no sidewalks, and there are also no shoulders to most of the roads either, so it's either ride in the ditch or get smashed by somebody in a Chevy Silverado, whose only concern will be to make sure your crushed body doesn't bring him down below 55 MPH (gas is expensive, dadgummit!).
So much for transportation. Let's talk culture in Fort Wayne. I do have to admit we've got a pretty decent Orchestra, and the libraries are pretty good. Other than that, we've got a few minor league sports teams--a Class A minor league baseball team, and a minor league hockey team. I went to the season opener for the hockey team this past weekend, and, well, let's say it was a bad time to have just finished reading Quo Vadis. So much meaningless spectacle for a team nobody outside of Fort Wayne cares about, or knows about in all likelihood. At least it wasn't as bad as the ceremonies at the Olympics.
Historically, Fort Wayne was a working-class city. It still is, but now a lot the manufacturing jobs are gone. However, there are a lot of jobs to be found in the service sector. If you've got the guts, the drive, the know-how AND a super-fun, positive attitude, you too can earn as much as $9 an hour at any one of the numerous nearby restaurants. Have a liberal arts degree? Fresh out of college? Feel free to join in the fun, because you sure as hell aren't going to find a decent job without five years experience doing the exact same thing you're looking to get into. My wife works part time at a clothing bank for $8 an hour because she can't find anything better; she has an English degree and has never made so much money in her life. Fun times. I, a college dropout, am making more than that AND have full-time employment.
and then the rugby team lost the World Cup final to South Africa 
