Simple methods for cooking lobster?

I don't have the book at the moment, its stuck in a box somewhere.
 
Rule 34: yes, even Lobsters.
 
Well, there we have it, missionary indeed, though a sideways variation. How edifying!
 
Revenge of the Lobsters would be an interesting title for a movie.


screaming-lobsters.jpg
 
I found the lobster book.

Again, the male responded immediately to the soft female's scent. Sniffing with his antennules, he closed and lowered his claws, stood on tiptoe, approached the female and circled her. As he circled he began to stroke the female's soft body with gentle sweeps of his large antennae.
Not only was the male not going to brutalize her, he evidently had an enormous reserve of patience, for his circling and stroking continued for another quarter of an hour. Finally the female raised herself to a standing position.... [and] the male now mounted the female from behind. Pressing his tail flippers and claws to the floor of the tank for support, he grasped her body underneath his with his walking legs and rotated her onto her back. The two lobsters lay face-to-face, as it were, with the male on top. Both lobsters fanned their soft swimmerets against each other in a flurry of excited stroking. Jelle [a scientist?] caught a glimpse of the male's hardened swimmerets pressed against the female's abdomen and saw him thrust several times. Apparently, lobster sex occurred in the missionary position -- but with double the male genitala. .... After fifteen minutes of foreplay, the act of copulation had taken eight seconds.
 
Shame on you guys.

No-one posted the lobster joke:


Link to video.

It's not the best version I have seen on youtube :(
 
They also die almost instantly when they go into boiling water. So its not really a cruel way to kill them.

Doesn't the taste come out stronger though if they marinate while the water comes to a boiling point?
 
Do lobsters get boiled alive these days or is the jury still out when it comes to animal cruelty and whatnot?

(offtopic, sorry, just wondering since Cutlass ended the thread so quick :) )

Put them to sleep first by lowing body tempature so they goto sleep.
Then pull all the meat out, batter in breadcrumbs, parmasan cheese, fresh herbs and grill.
 
contre said:
The screaming sound is either stream escaping from their shells or boiling water being forced in... I can't recall which.
I think it is steam escaping.
 
I've more experience with yabbies (freshwater crayfish) than lobster.
Essentially you come down to two choices, as to which is more humane
- live into already boiling water (kills "instantly")
- live into water; then boil (supposedly painless death "they go to sleep")
 
Ah, dang, I typed up the lobster thing for nothing. :(
 
Cook said lobster alive, hear the screams and laugh maniacally over your subjects as you live your tyrannical dreams out in your kitchen.
 
I've more experience with yabbies (freshwater crayfish) than lobster.
Essentially you come down to two choices, as to which is more humane
- live into already boiling water (kills "instantly")
- live into water; then boil (supposedly painless death "they go to sleep")

If you're worried about cruelty to crayfish, I can direct you to a bunch of 7-year-olds with magnifying glasses who are engaged in mass, systematic cruelty.
 
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