The Rules of Being a Man

[Rambuchan]

How about never ask for directions. In fact never ask for help of any kind.

Excellent! Sorry I missed this one. Dunno how it happened.

And there's a new one added for you guys discussing size.

 

[Sickman]

You forget the obvious rule:
Name it, raise it, brag about it AKA always talk loud about your cheney and your relationship with it.
After all it's the most important relationship in one's lifetime (after mother) for the "real men".

Anyway what's the point of rules if you cannot break them?

Moderator Action: One of the rules on CFC is language - better not break that one again
Please read the forum rules: http://forums.civfanatics.com/showthread.php?t=422889

 

[Rambuchan]

**** the rules.

Obey the rules? Laud the rules? Fear the rules?

 

[Mise]

Observe how he resorts to gross exaggeration to compensate for his deficiency.

Actually, you're right, my Cheney is simply too big for my body, so I like to go to the gym 3 times a week, where I bench press african elephants. I must admit, however, that I still can't lift your mum.

(when in doubt.... YOUR MUM!!!)

 

[IglooDame]

Real Men don't care about following the rules for being Real Men.

 

[The Last Conformist]

Last, is that you at a uh, 'Halloween' party?

No. I'm rather skinnier.

 

[Oruc]

Real Men don't care about following the rules for being Real Men.

so real men cry alot and hug other men?.

 

[Rambuchan]

Real Men don't care about following the rules for being Real Men.

Actually, as with size, this is so obvious it isn't (usually) worth mentioning by real men.

 

[The Last Conformist]

Actually, you're right, my Cheney is simply too big for my body, so I like to go to the gym 3 times a week, where I bench press african elephants. I must admit, however, that I still can't lift your mum.

(when in doubt.... YOUR MUM!!!)

I don't think bench press is the best method of making your arms long enough to reach across the North Sea.

 

[Mise]

Well, the rules aren't really "rules" to be "followed", more like witty observations about how men actually do act.

EDIT:
@TLC: It's not just about length

 

[Rambuchan]

EDIT: @TLC: It's not just about length

Oh god, another cuboid showing off! :shakehead

 

[Bigfoot]

Real men don't shave any of their body parts but their face (exceptions are allowed for competitive swimmers). Manicures and pedicures are out too.

 

[Cu Chulainn]

The Moving Rule: If a man whom you consider a friend asks you to help him move and you are free you MUST accept. BUT: He must provide beer and/or food either during or immediately after the move.

The Beer Rule: The manliness of any given beer is inversely proportional to the amount of light that can pass through a full glass. Real men don't buy light beer for themselves.

 

[nonconformist]

Real men drink beer or cider, or said drinks with spirits added.
Under no circumstance should a real man, unless in posh company drink wine, and unde rno circumstance whatsoever should he be reduced to drinking Bacardi Breezers, or other likewise filth.

 

[Sickman]

Obey the rules? Laud the rules? Fear the rules?

Sometimes men have to learn to break the boundaries and rules set by other men in order to survive or achieve a worthy goal (example a lady).

(Moderator action is acknowledged and cursing won't happen again.)

 

[Rambuchan]

Sometimes men have to learn to break the boundaries and rules set by other men in order to survive or achieve a worthy goal (example a lady).

One of my pending sigs is one of two quotes along these very lines by William Blake.

And thank you Bigfoot for pointing out another blindly obvious one regarding shaving.

 

[King Alexander]

Real men don't eat soups, fruits and all these 'unreal' food! Real men hunt down animals and eat them alive or 'grilled' at a hot desert rock!

 

[Rambuchan]

Real men don't eat soups, fruits and all these 'unreal' food! Real men hunt down animals and eat them alive or 'grilled' at a hot desert rock!

Although I recognise and commend the old school methodology, I have to maintain some kind of relevance for the modern macho man. We can simple get minions to slaughter these creatures wholescale for us while we wrestled with far more lovely things.

@ Cu Chulainn: What's all this about beer and light? You sound like an alco having a moment of clarity.

 

[ironduck]

Real men dont eat quiche.

Mmmmmmm.... quiche!

 

[Cu Chulainn]

Quite the opposite actually. I've been seriously drunk only twice in my life. (I'm 23) I drink beer because I enjoy the taste. Light beer has no real flavor as far as I can tell so the only reason I can see to drink it is to get drunk which is never my goal.