DroopyTofu
Double Bass Double Bass
Francis Bacon: First person to discover the perfect bacon wins. Oh wait, that'd be if I designed it!
What if Civilization was created by...
- Thread starter Jafendel
- Start date
Save_Ferris
Admiring Myself
Hasbro: The new Civilization series is far better than all of the other Civilization series, and is actually enjoyable to play. It develops a huge online fanbase, but some still hate it because they associate it with the previous Civilization games.
Saxony
Chieftain
Can somebody please create one with GLaDOS and other Portal characters?
Darth Caesar
Might be a Wizard
GLaDOS: Game is normal until you research the "Portal" technology after which you must spend eternity running test.
Ailedhoo
wonderer
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2012
- Messages
- 7,809
Sir Humphrey Appleby: leaders are all looking after their own intrests in even more ways then they were in Sid Meier's civilizations. Researching Civil Services stops the ineffeicency penalty and attempting to cut down results in decline of your civilization. Each quote in the game will have a cynicall tringe. The A.I. has been uped to be manipulative to the exstream.
dragonprobably
The Poster Formerly Known as MartinLuther
So I'm guessing your making fun of the Jehovah's Witnesses?
You win the thread.
desert (i always get them confused)
Here's how I remember it: Dessert, you always want seconds. Desert you don't.
Hasbro: All horses are multi-colored. For all modern infantry units (i.e.: Marines) half of their attack strength is determined by your amount of science output (because knowing is half the battle.) Also, whenever one of your tanks fight, it transforms into a robot.
As for other companies:
RIAA: If any site makes the game downloadable, the site will get sued into oblivion. If you post a video containing any game play, the video gets taken down. Also, the music is pretty good until you are late into the Modern Era.
Supporters of Marijuana Legalization: Getting access to marijuana increases happiness, increases science output, decreases crime, and decreases war weariness.
Kieth Olberman: Republic is the worst Government and the American leader is always the worst.
Bill O'Reiley: Democracy is the worst Government and America is the best Civ.
Valve: Each unit has a silly hat (I'm surprised no one has made that joke.)
Matt Groening: All units and leaderheads have yellow skin and there is a lot of good humor up until the Modern Era but when you get Future Tech it's funny again. Also, it's a rip off of Age of Empires.
Gamefreaks: If any of your units wander into grassland, there will be random battles with barbarian units.
HappySoft: The whole map is a picture of propaganda in a blue hue. Whenever you get into wars you send one guy to battle an army composed of 2 types of units and tanks. At the end of each wave, you fight the disembodied head of the leader of the Civ. There are 2 types of resources, heroin (which is good for your Civilization) and disc (which is bad for your civilization.)
OutSide Directors Company: The Gameplay consists of exploring the world, which has some very strange looking terrain. The other civilizations have very strange looking units and leaderheads that might look like everyday objects. Which you should probably interact with. Don't interact with the civilization that has grey as it's team color, that's bad for your civilization. The game also has some very strange music.
Ailedhoo
wonderer
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2012
- Messages
- 7,809
Toady One: mining is vital to your ecomony. Certain powers will always be at war with you with a policy of kidnapping your citiziens to make as part of their own. Volcanos give a industry bonus with risk. Random forces will appear to try to destroy you. Some civs are set of their own way. There is no victory conditions: instead the longer you last the most epic your lose will be for losing is fun!
dragonprobably
The Poster Formerly Known as MartinLuther
Civ'ed
I ain't gotta explain a thing
Valve: Adding to the above, all patches add hats, instead of working on the sequel everyone is waiting for.
The internet wins (Scroll down until ''Vermont Style'')
Will the Oblivion site be sued into Oblivion of it makes Civ downloadable?
dragonprobably
The Poster Formerly Known as MartinLuther
Nintz
King of the Britons
I can't believe no one chose this but...
Suda 51
The game is published after almost no marketing yet many love it for the creative styles. The game consistently portrays a plot through random units doing crazy stuff.
Like therapist ninjas having to kill a toaster king inside of demon stomach levels.
Once you win, a ending that makes no sense is shown. It most likely involves a motorcycle-riding lich king. But you don't know that. Then the camera zooms out to show a completely unknown protagonist with a lightsaber. Alternatively, a psychedelic meaning of life style ending is shown, in which you check your speakers and monitor at least twice to make sure they are actually working.
Unfortunetly, the game suffers from consistent problems, such as having to wait for barbarians so your units have enough promotions to defeat overpowered bosses. These promotions aren't even that good, just generic base changes. And the problem of turns only being able to use 20% of the processor at once because army sizes were underestimated.
So, of course, critics lambast it for its numerous problems. It develops a cult following for the good points, yet the IP of Sudaization is never heard from again. Except as a reference for games like Total War: Chainsaw Vacuum Cleaners.
Suda 51
The game is published after almost no marketing yet many love it for the creative styles. The game consistently portrays a plot through random units doing crazy stuff.
Like therapist ninjas having to kill a toaster king inside of demon stomach levels.
Once you win, a ending that makes no sense is shown. It most likely involves a motorcycle-riding lich king. But you don't know that. Then the camera zooms out to show a completely unknown protagonist with a lightsaber. Alternatively, a psychedelic meaning of life style ending is shown, in which you check your speakers and monitor at least twice to make sure they are actually working.
Unfortunetly, the game suffers from consistent problems, such as having to wait for barbarians so your units have enough promotions to defeat overpowered bosses. These promotions aren't even that good, just generic base changes. And the problem of turns only being able to use 20% of the processor at once because army sizes were underestimated.
So, of course, critics lambast it for its numerous problems. It develops a cult following for the good points, yet the IP of Sudaization is never heard from again. Except as a reference for games like Total War: Chainsaw Vacuum Cleaners.
dragonprobably
The Poster Formerly Known as MartinLuther
Space Core: The only way you could win the game is through the space race.
KaiserElectric
Total Freakin Besties
- Joined
- Dec 2, 2007
- Messages
- 3,461
Capcom: You can only win with a score victory. For any other victory, you need to buy the respective DLC for $10 each, despite the fact that everything is already there for you to achieve the victories.
Xbox Live: The AI is terrible, and the leaderheads shout racist gibberish at you when you win.
Republicans: The top three civs always win.
Democrats: Halfway through the game most of your cities are given to the other teams, and by the end of the game the cities are desert fallout and you have to pay 100
every turn as maintenance anyway. Oh, and the top three civs always win.
SCP Foundation: [REDACTED]
Xbox Live: The AI is terrible, and the leaderheads shout racist gibberish at you when you win.
Republicans: The top three civs always win.
Democrats: Halfway through the game most of your cities are given to the other teams, and by the end of the game the cities are desert fallout and you have to pay 100
every turn as maintenance anyway. Oh, and the top three civs always win.SCP Foundation: [REDACTED]
Ailedhoo
wonderer
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2012
- Messages
- 7,809
Capcom: You can only win with a score victory. For any other victory, you need to buy the respective DLC for $10 each, despite the fact that everything is already there for you to achieve the victories.
Xbox Live: The AI is terrible, and the leaderheads shout racist gibberish at you when you win.
Republicans: The top three civs always win.
Democrats: Halfway through the game most of your cities are given to the other teams, and by the end of the game the cities are desert fallout and you have to pay 100
SCP Foundation: [REDACTED]
American Political Figures: two largest sides within the current leading power focus on attacking each other as oppose to improving the situration, claiming they will lead to victory even though other powers are set to rise above before 2050...
EU: Having Democracy gives you a bonus to ecomony.
China: Having Democracy gives you a chance of rebellions.
North Korea: the "Leader" faith is introduce, giving bonus to everything. O and having
Britian: Monarchy is now set as a Civic line along with "Republic." Tea becomes a resource which not having gives you massive penalties.
Cuba: all Capitalists receive health penalties.
France: EVERYONE BOWS BEFORE THE GLORY OF THE BIG, BLUE BLOB!
KaiserElectric
Total Freakin Besties
- Joined
- Dec 2, 2007
- Messages
- 3,461
Civ'ed
I ain't gotta explain a thing
I like how we've become infamous site-wise
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