500 ways you know your computer sucks

[Maniacal]

523. The pixel only has one colour, black.

 

[DvD-IT]

(which would lead to...)

524. You can't actually know if your monitor is turned off or on. It always looks like the same.

 

[salty mud]

525. It looks like this.

 

[Maniacal]

526: Your computer consists of each and every idea in this thread, meaning you have multiple monitors of verious types, numerous powerplants, etc.

527; it's made up of parts from different kinds of computers and is running dozens of different operating systems all at once.

 

[Yuri2356]

528) Your computer was assembled by tossing various components into a box and then shaking it for several hours.

 

[Genocidicbunny]

527; it's made up of parts from different kinds of computers and is running dozens of different operating systems all at once.

If its running many OS's at the same time, does that not mean that it doesnt suck?

 

[Maniacal]

If its running many OS's at the same time, does that not mean that it doesnt suck?

530: You never kow what OS which part of the computer is running.

It'ss kind of runing them from multiple hard drives of various shoddyness, Sometimes all at once. To different displays and parts of the computer.

 

[TheLoneMan]

531: You keep an alarm clock next to your computer so you can get woken up when the page loads.

 

[Elit3]

532) your computer is a dell.

 

[NikNaks]

533: A lamp has more processing power.

 

[MooManof_]

534. The hard disk is a circular brick.
535. The floppy disk is a circular rubber brick.
536. A Compact Disk is simply out of the question.

 

[ggganz]

531: You keep an alarm clock next to your computer so you can get woken up when the page loads.

537. An alarm clock comes free with the computer (for unknown reasons, but really it is for this purpose)
538. You wish the computer had the power of the alarm clock.
539. A computer comes free with the alarm clock so you can have another reason to use it.

 

[plarq]

540. Even Commodore 64 is too advanced.
541. The only game that can be played on your computer is "Kick it".

 

[Kracky]

542. Your computer has cave drawings on it

543. You have a team of hamsters powering it.

 

[Eran of Arcadia]

544. It won't run for more than 5 minutes without freezing, as one of the fans stopped working, thus you are forced to use your roommate's computer. (this is true . . .)

 

[Mewtarthio]

545) It's so inefficient that powering it requires you to violate the Laws of Thermodynamics.

546) Whenever you send a file to the recycling bin, you hear a voice saying, "Please, I beg of you, don't leave me to linger any more. If you have any kindness in your soul, press 'Empty'!"

547) Rather than simply being deleted, your programs will revolt against you, take on the forms of supernatural beings, and rally beneath a mysterious French man with a slutty wife. Meanwhile, your security system has been corrupted and transformed into an all-consuming virus.

 

[Fundamentality]

548) You need a nuclear power plant just to run the computer.

 

[NikNaks]

549. You buy Civ, but realise that you need a monitor to run it

 

[ggganz]

550. Your computer is so insulted by this thread that it has learned telepathy and is not allowing you to think of anything to post. (May be true for me, but apparently computer needs another lesson because I could think of that.)

 

[carmen510]

551. You find out the Nuclear Power Plant had a meltdown due to your computer overcapacitying it.
552. Your computer had such a giant fan, that's where the Earth's wind comes from.
553. Your computer moniter is about as big as a microchip.