Abaddon's Weird News of the World!

[Ferocitus]

Crocodiles, box jellyfish fail to deter 155 from swimming across Darwin's Fannie Bay
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-07-...sh-fail-to-deter-fannie-bay-swim-race/9955676

The race is absolutely, 100% safe, according to this bloke...
"We've never lost a swimmer and we don't anticipate losing one in the future,"
Mr Creek said.

 

[Broken_Erika]

A Flock of Drunken Seagulls

Drunken gulls "stinking of alcohol" are being taken for treatment to an RSPCA centre in Somerset.

https://www.bbc.com/news/av/uk-england-hampshire-44737945/drunk-gulls-found-stinking-of-alcohol

 

[Broken_Erika]

A Homicidal Swan.

'Traumatic' scenes as swan kills 20 others in Pembroke

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-wales-south-west-wales-44765056

 

[Silurian]

Where I live the signets are eaten by by the seagulls

 

[Broken_Erika]

Dr Bumbum on the run. Dr Bumbum career is done.

Dr Bumbum: Brazil plastic surgeon on run after patient dies

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-44866766

 

[Morty]

Gnome thief falls through fence with stolen ornament:-
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-en...hief-falls-through-fence-with-stolen-ornament
Not exactly news, but made me smile!

 

[Silurian]

That was a big Gnome.

I wonder if they will here from it again.

from BBC

""A couple from Lincolnshire whose garden ornaments were stolen have received postcards from their missing gnome.""

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/lincolnshire/7592544.stm

 

[Arakhor]

Words fail me here, they really do.

 

[Takhisis]

Words fail me here, they really do.

You may also be interested in:

• Open-shirted Goldblum statue wows crowds

 

[Broken_Erika]

Government admits rabies poster gaffe

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-manchester-44911209

 

[Broken_Erika]

A Japanese city has been forced to clarify it is not in fact recruiting ninjas, following reports that it was facing a shortage of skilled assassins.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-44964020

 

[hobbsyoyo]

A Homicidal Swan.

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-wales-south-west-wales-44765056

Live by the waddle, die by the waddle.

 

[Arakhor]

How do you find this stuff, Erika?

 

[Samson]

Egypt zoo denys painting black stripes on a donkey to make it look like a zebra.

Sure looks like it to me, images in spoiler for comparison.

Spoiler Donkey and zebra photos :

donkey:

Zebra:

 

[PhroX]

Sheffield topiarist 'disgusted by drunk hedge sex'

A topiarist says he is having to make regular repairs to his hedge due to drunk people pretending to have sex with it.

Keith Tyssen has maintained his "privet lady" at his Sheffield home since 2000, but is often woken up in the night by distracted passers-by.

"They're climbing on top of her and pulling her legs apart - you know, it's disgusting," he said.

Mr Tyssen has considered putting up a sign or an alarm to curb the behaviour.

The hedge, which he has sculpted over the past 40 years, started off as a Greek god but he changed it into a reclining woman at the turn of the millennium.

 

[Takhisis]

How do you find this stuff, Erika?

It's all on the Beeb. Between that and the Indy's I100 you should have enough (let alone places such as Geekologie who specialise in the weird).

 

[Yeekim]

Sheffield topiarist 'disgusted by drunk hedge sex'

CK2 has an event (for Lunatics, iirc) where you can make love to a dryad/rosebush.

 

[Takhisis]

Tourists take lodgings at Japanese monastery, complain on booking.com that the food is bland and vegetarian, a US-born monk calls them ‘uneducated **cks’.
From my twice/thrice-weekly perusal of the Graun.

 

[Arakhor]

Mary Berry and Rick Astley appear on-stage together.

 

[Takhisis]

If this thread becomes serialised and Erika snags post #1,000 then the thread should become Erika's Weird News of the World.