Ask an Asperger

[ParkCungHee]

I did not mean it forcefully, I'm sorry if I could not convey my intents in typing, I merely meant that theres also significant social reasons why people would not want to be labeled with Asperger's. As for the diagnosis, I would say that in the very least the majority of people diagnosed truely have it, and would agree that the proper diagnosis by a psychologist is neccesary before you claim to have it.

 

[Bill3000]

I ARE JOIN THIS BANDWAGON

...that is, I have Aspergers. I guess you can consider a "successful" case, too, but whatever. (I won a county-wide award for overcoming my disability, SO HAH)

Please provide a definition of your condition.

Probably the most blunt layman's terms is this: Average-to-high intelligence, but socially ********. More seriously, there's thousands of webpages that can explain it better than I do, and if there's one thing I suck at, it's explaining things.

How hard do you find it to make good friends?

Well, let's seperate between online and offline. Online - until recently, quite hard; whatever friends I did have made fun of me constantly and the like. I know that a lot of it is my fault because of the way I acted.

Offline: I can't really say "similar" here, because that's a whole different ballgame. "Extreme hard" here. It's been much tougher in the past though, and now it is far more of a matter of the lack of my own initiative because of the pains of the past and my innate shyness, rather than the various social disabilities that Aspergers gives me.

Do you know of anyone on this forum who claims not to have Asperger's?

Yes, plenty. It's a common stereotype, and it makes sense because of how comforting the internet is to Aspies, but it's not a necessary condition to be a geek to have Aspergers. As you can see with some people here on the forums, people with Aspies often are outsiders even to geeks/nerds, despite having things in common with them.

Are you in treatment?

Not as much as I used to be. I take Ritalin when I need it, and I go to a psychologist, but that's about it.

C'mon - what're all your savant abilities?

Physics and math. But I don't think that they are necessary my obsessions though, because obsessions can change over time... But those are things that can be considered "savant" abilities of mine, and is what often stupefies people when they talk to me because of my large knowledge of it. Sadly my knowledge is still quite immature, as I oddly havn't decided to major in physics until recently, but that's a different story.

I wonder what it is about either the Syndrome that attracts people with it to CFC or what it is about CFC that attracts people with AS?

When it comes to forums - nothing beats social stuff when it comes to the internet. No physical social interaction.

I know two aspergers but they're very different of each other. Other one is so called "active" asperger. He speaks alot, but because he is thinking faster than he can speak sometimes it's hard to make any sense of it at all. Half finished words, sentences and thoughts everywhere. If there's a sarcastic person around it gets ugly quick. And the asperger person doesn't even realize someone is making fun of him.

The "active" aspie is a lot like me. Though I've gotten much better at detecting sarcasm. That's only around, say, one person or so that I am comfortable with - the rest I'm shy and try to go away quickly from.

Obviously, it doesnt work for everybody, but if my kid, or somebody I loved had Aspergers, I would seek a treatment plan, just like I would for any other mental abnormality, if it negativally impacted their quality of life.

Well, what is "normal?" That's the ultimate question. Aspergers has a lot that deviates from normal life, but the tradeoffs that it can often give can make it worth it. When you're a genius, no one cares about your social skills or your ability to make friends, they admire you for your abilities. Of course, this isn't the case for everyone with Aspergers, but still...

Socializing is only interesting IMO if its with the opposite sex.

You know, it's sad that out of all of the obsessions an Aspie can have, you have one that has a stumbling block from day one. You need to learn how to cope with all of your normal social skills before you can think about socalizing with the opposite sex. It's why I've given up on girls until later on (or for some reason I get lucky, and no, not that way, you perverts).

When I was a kid no one I knew claimed to have this disease. Now dozens claim to have it. Now what does that tell me?

Aspergers wasn't even offically a disorder until 1994.

I'll post more later.

 

[Bigfoot]

We have a four year old son who is currently being tested for possible AS. He is bright and has a very good memory, but his socialization skills are well behind other kids his age. My questions:

- At what age were you diagnosed with AS?
- Who made the diagnosis, and on what basis?
- In what ways has your educational experience been different?
- What kinds of support have been most important and / or effective for you?

 

[Cannae]

I have a usual answer to this question. I don't really have friends, I have aquientences. I know people, I speak to these people daily, and I enjoy associating with those people, but I would not say we are truely friends. I am in a sense, friendly with many, but friends with few.

That's pritty much sums up how I am. However unlike most people with Aspergers I am very social but because I don't have any friends it leaves me to be very depresed at times. It's relly kind of a bad combo I think

Do you get annoyed when people refer to it as "Assburger"?

No to tell you the truth I kind of find a little bit funny.

 

[Rhymes]

I can't order at a fast food place at all. I have to get someone else to do it.

Can you try to explain what prevents you from ordering. Is it stress, or incapability to talk properly, or something else?

 

[ParkCungHee]

Its mostly unfamiliarity. People don't realise it often, but there are an immense number of rules in social etiquette. If you were to try and write a book covering every imaginable social rule it would have so many volumes as to fill libraries.
For me, I have trouble ordering at Subway because it violates a pre-existing social rule, that is, not pestering people. Because you learn not to pester people or they will get upset, you assume they will do so, even though there job requires you to pester them. Additionally, if you violate any of the social rules that you might not know of, which is very possible as it is a new situation, you know they will become upset. Therefor its very unfamiliar and stressful.
Social interaction is alot like the cardgame Mao for me.

 

[Solver]

I'll take a shot at answering some. I haven't been diagnosed and almost certainly never will but I exhibit a very high amount of characteristics typical to AS, although my social skills are slightly better than the average AS guy. Still, reading articles about the unusual things of AS people felt largely like reading a description of myself. This disclaimer aside...

How hard do you find it to make good friends?

Like Park, I'd say I have acquaintances mostly, not friends. This was true for a long time with me, although I have made a few really good friends. I am rather distrustful of people in general but them I have complete trust in, and I can discuss personal stuff with them, too. I can't really get friendly with "regular" people, though, the ones I get friendly with are unusual in some way or another.

Which languages do you find the greatest connection to? Which make the most intuitive sense?

For some reason, German seems to make a lot of sense intuitively. I actually learned a lot of German words by simply figuring them out from context and their meanings just snap into place, sometimes assisted by vague similarities / associations with other languages. I think that my "connection" to English is rather strong for a non-native language.

I wonder what it is about either the Syndrome that attracts people with it to CFC or what it is about CFC that attracts people with AS?

I honestly believe that Civ forums are rather natural for AS people, because Civ is. Civ has micromanagement, which appeals to some with AS. Civ is likely to appeal to a particular person's intense field of interest (history, city development, a specific leader, etc). Civ is a logical game with underlying mathematical concepts and a game of intellect. This is not to say that Civ appeals to Aspergers or autists or nerds only, not by a long shot, but it has things these people like.

What's your savant ability?

I don't quite like the idea of naming specific ones. Does memory count? Also, linguistics - I have a rather intuitive understanding of languages and generally remember words well and certainly computers, computers are my main interest, I'm definitely good with them and I find programming to be a very enjoyable activity.

How do you do with 3D rotation?

I know that 3D thinking is a strong point of many with AS. I, however, am completely devoid of it. I can not imagine even the 3D rotations of the simplest objects. When I can, it takes me a long time and the mental image is never really clear. Partially associated with this is my absolutely inability to draw in perspective. My drawings are always "flat", like those of 5 year olds. I've learned to draw a few 3D shapes (cube, cylinder), but that is through memorization of what to draw in what order. I had immense trouble with stereometry (3D geometry) concepts because I could never "see" the things in 3D. Oh, and I was always the worst in arts classes in school.

 

[Chukchi Husky]

- At what age were you diagnosed with AS?

Around seven or eight.

- Who made the diagnosis, and on what basis?

Doctors at the hospital. I think a teacher first noticed I was different.

- In what ways has your educational experience been different?

I think only two teachers in the two schools I went to knew about Asperger's syndrome. The rest of them thought I was shy. I got picked on a lot by almost all of the other kids except by a few, probably the closest I ever got to any friends. When I got older it got worse, and the other kids thought I was homosexual, so they started to bully me because of that and when they got the chance began touching me. The only thing that stop that was leaving school, but I failed anyway.

- What kinds of support have been most important and / or effective for you?

I only had a tiny bit.

Can you try to explain what prevents you from ordering. Is it stress, or incapability to talk properly, or something else?

Fear mostly.

 

[thetrooper]

By imagining multiple objects in the same apparent position. Try visualising the lines between opposing corners for a square (an X), a cube and then a hypercube...

Alright! I'll stick to chemistry.

I've debated whether I should post this question or not, but curiosity got the better of me. Do you think that your sense of humour is different from the average guy?

 

[Chukchi Husky]

Do you think that your sense of humour is different from the average guy?

I don't have a sense of humour.

 

[thetrooper]

You sure you never laughed at something?

 

[Chukchi Husky]

You sure you never laughed at something?

I never laugh at anything.

 

[Kyriakos]

Chukchi, do you still draw pictures?

You should really get a new scanner (iirc you said the old one was unavailable) and post them Im sure some people here would like them, including me

 

[Chukchi Husky]

Chukchi, do you still draw pictures?

I don't draw anymore.

You should really get a new scanner (iirc you said the old one was unavailable) and post them Im sure some people here would like them, including me

I have a new one, but the last time I posted any no one noticed.

 

[Kyriakos]

Well post again; i didnt see it at all, and threads here tend to get lost pretty fast if they are about art (damn art-hating CFC barbarians )

Infact you could even post some here i guess, or pm me to send if you want to

 

[Chukchi Husky]

I don't know.

 

[Kyriakos]

Well i still think that you should post some pics In my view being able to draw something which you and others find interesting, is not at all an insignificant one. Obviously others will be seing different things in what you have drawn, but that is happening always in any form of art anyway. What is more important is that it would be pleasant to see

 

[Reno]

- At what age were you diagnosed with AS?

Around the age of five.

- Who made the diagnosis, and on what basis?

A professional psychologist from the Childrens' Hospital of Helsinki. On what basis? I was too young to remember and I've never asked my parents.

- In what ways has your educational experience been different?

From the first grade to the fourth I was on a special teaching class, meaning it was a smaller group, being taught by a special trained teacher and an assistant teacher. I moved to a regular school class at the start of the fift grade.

- What kinds of support have been most important and / or effective for you?

My supporting family, who's bared with my temper tantrums for all these years.

 

[Erik Mesoy]

I've debated whether I should post this question or not, but curiosity got the better of me. Do you think that your sense of humour is different from the average guy?

Somewhat, but that's mostly because of obscure and/or specialized jokes.

What do you call an Abelian group with an associative, commutative second operator and the power to corrupt mortals?

Spoiler :

The One Ring.

This is funnier if you've studied number theory and know what a group is, and what a ring is. And at that level, you probably also know why it can't be allowed (not only isn't, but can't) to divide by zero.

Also, I like a category of humor that isn't exactly absurdist, but perhaps upsetting and violative of the status quo.

What was the most embarrassing Asperger thing you have done?

I don't keep a list, so it took me a while to think of my answer to this one.

I was about six at the time, living in South Africa, and my hair was long, much as it is now. (It falls past my nipples. Yes, I said that just for the sake of using "nipples" in a serious sentence.) My family was at McDonald's, and I was in the plastic playhouse. At some point, there was a girl who asked if I was a girl or a boy. I told her that I was a boy. She didn't believe me. I told her that I was a boy and I didn't appreciate her calling me a liar. She called me a liar and ugly. So I took off my pants.

 

[Rhymes]

There seems to be a weird correlation between asperger syndrome and scandinavian countries.
I'm also kinda starting to doubt the legitimacy of this syndrome. Like any other things, some people really have a disorder while in many other cases it might be just a mental thing.

When I see how you guys descrive the effects of the syndrome, I can only imagine that I could have been diagnosed as one when I was a teen. I was shy, unable to interract socialy with girls, didn't have many friends, I was uncomfortable asking directions or talking to strangers. But I don't think it was caused by a syndrome, I was just gorwing up and having normal personality problems that teens have. When I got older all that went away.
And the fact that a doctor can diagnose it isn't a rock solid argument, as the diagnostic isn't based on any physical evidency but on social inabilities and such.