Land claims: Texas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Louisiana, in that order of priority. Then, if any more, as many Mexican territories as I can grab.
Governmental System: Federalist Republic, run by dual Presidency, currently serving as Presidents are Sarah Palin and Dr. Ron Paul. Each state is given one vote in the unicameral legislature, the senate. We have a strict tenth amendment policy (Believe it or not, its so happens to bee the tenth) and states rights are supreme over the federal government.
Military: Palin wanted a heavy peacetime draft, Paul wanted no draft. In compromise, the draft will be limited to 50,000 citizens in peacetime, chosen at random, but unlimited in wartime. The maximum 50K are currently being filled.
Social Policy: State by state, but generally very conservative. Western Texas and the Mexican territories are a bit more liberal.
Fiscal Policy: Flat tax, 1/6th of all income, whether you earn a dollar a day or a million, we don't care. One sixth.
States can institute taxes and welfare if they want.
Foreign policyaul's isolationism has been winning out, and Teahadistan is content to simply run its own ultraconservative country and leave everyone else at peace.
1. The Federalist Republic of Teahadistan will cede any lands south of the Rio Grande to the Greater Cascadian Empire.
2. The Federalist Republic of Teahadistan will cede Arkansas to the Greater Cascadian Empire.
3. The Federalist Republic of Teahadistan will treat its citizens in accordance with the Portland Laws of Year 1
4. The Greater Cascadian Empire will have officials stationed in the Federalist Republic of Teahadistan to make sure the Federalist Republic of Teahadistan will follow the Portland Laws of Year 1.
5. The Federalist Republic of Teahadistan will pay 10% of their national income to the Greater Cascadian Empire.
“GÜNSCHE!!” bellowed Hitler, “GÜNSCHE, WHERE THE <redacted> ARE YOU?!”
“What’s the problem, My Leader?” called Krebs, running down the hall to meet him.
“I’m not in any <redacted> mood for wise-asses right now,” he snapped. “Where the bloody hell did all these knights come from?!”
“Um, England, I believe, My Leader. They dumped their kingdom on the Justice League and showed up in Rostock about six hours ago.”
“Well get rid of them! They’re wrecking the mahogany!”
“But the staff is getting along so well–!”
Hitler went red in the face. “EVERYONE! MY OFFICE! NOW!”
“It’s not my fault!” Sir Robin shouted after him.
------------------------------
The officers were gathered around the desk where a map of Europe was spread across the top. Everyone stood but Hitler and Göring, the latter dressed in his white Luftwaffe uniform. On either side of the desk were two men with clipboards; one was trying to empirically quantify the collective insanity of Multipolarity, the other was sketching bunnies.
“–But there’s still so many ways this could backfire,” Keitel was saying, “Please, give this another think-over–”
“The Justice League is the only faction I’ve seen sell off so much of its own land since Carthage in IOT3,” the Leader retorted, tapping the map, “We’d be idiots not to seize this opportunity.”
“My Leader,” said Jodl, “What exactly are we planning?”
“They’ve stated publicly they’re not interested in Britain, which means odds are the Isles are up for auction. If we can claim them for ourselves, we’ll not only gain control of British cinema and its hallowed comedy tradition, but we might even persuade those knights to leave the bunker.” He made a dismissive gesture.
“What’s the deal, My Leader?”
Hitler dragged his hand across the main island, mapping out the partition. “We’ll pay them 60 RPoints for England this turn, and try to buy the rest out later.”
“Having their diplomat arrive in a nihilist-overman shout-out was well-received,” interjected Krebs. “As quintessentially American and Dickish as Superman is, the Justice League as a whole seems amicable.”
“Right; I see no reason they won’t do business with us.”
Jodl leaned forward. “But My Leader, trying to buy out their land like this might antagonize them!”
“Dammit Jodl, you ALWAYS doubt me!” He thumped the desk.
“60 RPoints is highway robbery!”
“Well for <redacted> sake, it’s more than they paid for it! Beggars can’t be choo-choo-choosers!” he snapped, head shaking violently.
Jodl straightened up. Mohnke entered the room and wove his way along the back wall. Hitler took a swig from small crystal glass filled with freshly-squeezed pomegranate juice. Göring glanced at his watch; there was a box of chocolate truffles back at airforce command that wasn’t going to inhale itself.
Hitler paused a moment before continuing. “In order to secure this deal, I’ve decided to break out my old superhero persona, the Iron Eagle.”
The room exploded in chatter.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding..!”
“Wait, that costume’s real?”
“You totally ripped that off deviantART!”
“Well, I thought it was cool...”
“How can you even stand straight in that thing?”
“Yeah, thanks for the support, you <redacted>,” he shouted overtop, quickly restoring silence. “Seems the only way to earn street cred these days is spandex or a cape, and frankly I don’t want to end up like Syndrome from The Incredibles. If you wanna win the Supers, you gotta BE a Super.”
“Gaining Britain will be a major boon to our economy,” Goebbels explained. “With France only interested in Belgium, we have the best stake in the region after Denmarj. By purchasing England, we also establish a precedent if anyone else tries to snap up the other countries. Once we have British media under our aegis, our comedy empire will be unstoppable.”
Hitler looked about the room and spied Mohnke. “Ah, Monkey.” The Brigadeführer didn’t even flinch. “‘Sup home-dog?”
He clicked his heels and saluted. “My Leader.”
“The Spanish war was a success; Fegelein managed to do something right for once. France wants to hold a conference over its fate; might as well humour them.”
“Given France forwent its ideological prejudice to facilitate our operations, Fegelein suggests it prudent to consider the possibility of some sort of trade agreement.” Hitler actually nodded in consideration. “However,” Mohnke continued, and the Leader looked up, “Talk of this global socialist alliance will probably lead them to cooler relations. They’re already antagonizing Australia with it.”
“Duly noted; thanks for the heads-up. Now, has Burgdorf worked out any new trade arrangements? I think it’s about time we got some proper funding for R&D.”
“Given how The Most Interesting Nation in the World still hasn’t acknowledged our previous offer, he’s gone for a... specially-tailored attempt at courting them...”
The Downfall Gang has finally tabled its response to Coruscant. In exchange for the aforemetioned goods, Coruscant will be granted a license to produce Downfall parodies at a starting fee of 15 RPoints, to be renewed annually*. We are confident the Coruscanti government understands the necessity of this tariff to recoup the cost of our recent war with Spain. Furthermore, we assure you that this price is open to renegotiation once national finances are in such a state to permit it.
* This does not mean per turn.
The Downfall Gang offers 60 RPoints to the Justice League for the purchase of the British territories marked in that dull maroon colour:
Also, if anyone's sent me offers and I haven't responded, remind me, since I've been slow to keep up.
Russia Accepts the invitation. We will send representative Evgeny Somov to attend the council (OOC: He was our minister of foreign affairs from a few updates back.
The Council of Russia voted today on whether to join the G.A.S. The vote was as follows:
27 in favor (all 15 Left Socialist, 11 New Russia, all 1 Independant
9 abstain (all 9 unincorporated representatives, these representatives usually do not participate in politics since their power is limited and they are temporary, unelected governors of border lands claimed during election periods.
16 oppose (11 New Russia, 4 Kazakhstan)
The resolution passed 27 to 16. For the first time ever, Russia is activly entering world affairs on a large, open and active scale.
In the meantime, Astrakhan was fully absorbed. Astrakhan became independant relativly early in the collpase of the Russian empire. The city allied with the short lived Caucasian empire, which collapsed in the Chechen Emirate, the South Caucasian Confederation (Krasnodar Conference), Georgia, Armenia, Azerbaijan, The Abkhazian - Ossetian alliance and other, even more inconsequential factions. Astrakhan thus grew in size, claiming much of the Northern reaches of the shortlived empire. Astrakhan was the first city to defeat the Ural Horde as they rose. They also contributed to the force that chased the Urals into Siberia. Astrakhan, Volgagrad and Kazan would come to dominate the region. However, the divided region did not grow, as Caucasian raids, and a major war between Volgograd and Kazan weakened the region. As rumors of New Barbarossa, which turned out to be false, spread, Astrakhan voted to join the Council of Russia.
In a small village in Normandy the local electoral station was set up in the local church. Catharine Albert was serving coffee to voters in the cafe near the church. When the time of her break she went to the kitchen, sat down and drank some coffee. The TV was on and famed debate show host plus journalist Victor Miles was giving a splendid broadcast as usual:
“The electorate of the French Commune has been visiting local electoral centres to cast their vote on two things: which of the political parties do they want in office, which as been a issue of massive heated political observation, and whether the French Commune should created & become part of a socialist union that could set the areas of France as part of a global reorganised body that could link itself via being the electorate of a single body of government, a single collective. Both the elections and the referendum have sprung controversies, with the former’s link as response to deal with the instability crisis now showings concern with extremist movements attempting to gain ground, while the referendum has the possibilities of fundamentally changing the idea of government...”
At around the time the word “fundamentally” came to creation, Catherine Albert had finished her coffee and was about to go back to commence her duty for the people when she walked into Casper Allard. “O hello” said she.
“Hello” said he.
“You finished your sift already?”
“Yes. I see your about to return to work.”
“Yes I am.”
“Good.”
“You voted?”
“Yup and you...?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
“Well”
“I will see you later.”
“See you soon.”
As they walked past each other, Catherine noticed a retired farmhand reading a newspaper in the corner, his white hair braced with glee. In this newspaper where the following new stories:
The Incorporated States of New Kinichikia and Australia are officially denounced once again by the French Commune but this time the denouncement has came with a request to other countries to join in undermining these two criminal run countries. A boycott has been made of all that represents these nations.
The Republic of Corsucant is sent a questionnaire to see if it would be able to join the Global Alliance of Socialism.
The Federalist Republic of Teahadistan has been labelled as “Hell” by many figures in France for the Federal nation’s conservative ways, with full boycott of their objectivist goods and a call internationally requesting as many nations as possible to denounce this greedy capitalist pig hive.
Any non socialist country wanting to join the G.A.S will be pleased to know that France is exporting the revolution via loaned rebel leaders. If you want to apply to join the G.A.S but are not socialist or democratic, then a young inspirational figure will appear in your country to create a revolt. Said figure will have his or her face placed onto T-shirts so that capitalists can exploit the image in the most ironic form of selling as could be.
France is to embrace Russia in a hug after the latter agreed to join the alliance created by the former. Comrades of the world unite!
With France voting on two great issues, all diplomats sent out will not be league to any of the political parties. Premier Abel Roux plans to go to the JLA after the election... if he remains in power that is.
This is Victor Miles reporting from atop the Tour Maine-Montparnasse, allowing me to see the most beautiful view of Paris... since I cannot see the former capitalist office tower, which is nowadays the headquarters of the French Economic Ministry. Now with this beautiful view of the capital of France, with the Eiffel Tower just over there, I am soon to receive the election results of both the general election and of the referendum on whether to create a socialist union of republics. Upon the later there has been debate on what to call it but before the results are in I think it might be a good idea to tell some news that may interest you all...
William Rothenberg, Chairman of the Spiritual Committee and chief rabbi of the French Commune, has called upon the French government (or the government of the possibly to form socialist union government) to not accept a trade deal from the newly forged Kingdom Israel but rather to denounce the country for being a Absolute Theocratic Monarchy, stating that the government system of Israel may “prove disastrous for the long run” and that “the world needs to move to democratic principles. We cannot chain people. God wants us to open are arms to all. A theocratic society is not a divine one but rather an oppressive one. Religion is about being open. Forcing people into religion is about being closed” Whoever wins the election is likely to heed Mr Rothenberg’s calls.
In additional news I have received word that the former King of Spain, Otto, is due to have his verdict called out shortly. The many figures being charged with war crimes in the international courts should demonstrate to the world that right will win over might via a warning to those wanting to commence war crimes that they will face the hammer of justice...
Wait... news just got in. The election results have been counted and are to be declare to I. Yes... I am listening now... yes.... um... golly! GOSH! NEWS IS IN! THE SOCIAL LIBERATION PARTY HAS KEPT ITS POSITION AS OWNER OF THE MOST SEATS! But... IT HAS LOST A MAJORITY AND IS NOW LIKELY TO MAKE A COALISTION WITH THE THIRD LARGEST PARTY... THE SOCIALIST REVOLUTION GUILD! Golly! It appears the meetings are already under way. The second place went to the Communist Party, the fourth to the Direct Democracy Party, the fifth place gone to the Radical Party of the Left and the Sixth to the French Capitalist Guild... golly... other parties will include...
WAIT! I got news about the referendum! The counts of it... have been counted! Results show... 58% say yes to making a socialist union of republics, 34% says no and the rest could not make up their minds! THIS IS HISTORY IN THE MAKING! I have also received some extra news. The name chosen for this union is... the Socialist Union of Democratic States (S.U.D.S), which will be made up of several states under a single government, with the states including the French Commune, the Democracy of Aragon, the Republic of Corsica, the Collective of Brittany, along with the added members of the Federal Collective Of Germany and the Peoples’ Democratic Republic of Greenland. With plans of buying Belgium from the Justice League of America we are ready to accept the Belgium Union into the S.U.D.S. The S.U.D.S will have its capital here in Paris. Well... what a moment of history, huh?
Anyway Abel Roux, the now Grand Premier of the Socialist Union of Democratic States, is on his way to visit the Justice League of America to talk about the possibilities of the S.U.D.S buying Belgium. With this and the foundation of the recently created Global Alliance of Socialism to takes its first meeting, this is a glorious day for Democratic Socialism. The coalitional government is likely to have Lisa Tolbert as Premier of the French Commune. Elections are underway in the other states of the S.U.D.S to see the Premiers to appear from them. With Tolbert in a civilian position, the title of Grand Marshal of the S.U.D.S has been granted to Jack O’Brian.
In other news Field Marshal Hector Lyon has given up his position in the French Army and migrated to Raiju due to his desire to life in a “warrior culture.” Whether he will attempt to gain a political position in Raiju is left to be found out...
William Rothenberg, Chairman of the Spiritual Committee and chief rabbi of the French Commune, has called upon the French government (or the government of the possibly to form socialist union government) to not accept a trade deal from the newly forged Kingdom Israel but rather to denounce the country for being a Absolute Theocratic Monarchy, stating that the government system of Israel may “prove disastrous for the long run” and that “the world needs to move to democratic principles. We cannot chain people. God wants us to open are arms to all. A theocratic society is not a divine one but rather an oppressive one. Religion is about being open. Forcing people into religion is about being closed” Whoever wins the election is likely to heed Mr Rothenberg’s calls.
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