Multipolarity III - Game Thread

[Mosher]

The United Kingdom of the Netherlands and Great Britain and the Kingdom of London announce that they will officially join the ARMS organization.

We will not undertake offensive actions against Hyontou or the Papal States in the event of war between ARMS and those nations, however, due to existing friendly relations and defensive pacts.

 

[christos200]

Namibian TV 7:

Welcome to the Namibia TV News with:

Jim (J):

Nganobi (N):

J: People of Namibia, welcome to our news. Let's see our news in titles:

Elections next year

The Spammers pay the Namibian debt

Economic Policy of the Government

J: Well, let's first talk about the dispute between the Government and the Federalists that led to the decision of the government to hold elections next year. Nganobi, can you tell us more?

N: Yes. The Federalists asked the Government, since all of Namibia is free now, to hold elections this year because in the last elections only a small part of the Namibian population voted, since much of the Namibian territory was occupied by Vampires and Mozabique.

The government said that it would hold the elections in the end of it's term, after three years. The Federalists accused the government of imposing constitutional dictatorship and Mr. Pohamba accused the opposition of being liars and not knowing the situation of the people, and that a lot of people are still homeless because of the war.

In the end, it was agreed that the government would hold elections next year, when some of the damage from the war would be repaired.

J: Ok..........now let's talk about some good news. It seems that the Spammers will pay the Namibian debt, right?

N: Yes, you are very right. The economic situation of the country after the war is not very good, and the payment of the debt would mean that Namibia would bankraupt. Thanks for us, the Spammers have decided to pay the Namibian debt, in order to allow the Government to give more fundings to develop the economy.

J: Yes, it seems that the funds will go for the creation of new Industry.

N: You are very right. The Government has decided to take some steps to end the economic crisis. First, the wages will decrease by 1.5 % so the Government can have more funds to loan to businessmen. The new loans will support Namibian and non Namibian businessmen who want to set up Industries in Namibia and also help Industries with economical problems. The President said '' This decrease on the wages may sound harsh, but the money found will be used to support new Industries in Namibia. New Industries = more jobs and more money. Also the decrease in the wages is minimal. In my opinion, this new economic policy will boost the economy of Namibia.''

J: So, with this, we end our News. We will see you in 6 hours again. Until then, have a good day.

 

[Tani Coyote]

Elections for UN Secretary to replace the outgoing Papal administration are now open. Nations, feel free to nominate and endorse as ye will.

Indonesia stands for nomination to the Secretariat. It pledges a more active Secretariat to resolve disputes as they arise.

Costa Rica also stands for nomination. As a party neutral to the current Papal-HITSGDP-ARMS rivalries, it feels it would be able to best serve as a mediator. It also has significant diplomatic and economic clout to "smooth" negotiations.

The Papacy is also proposing a dissolution of the Union. Vote as you will.

The Imperium of Man wishes to consider a trade treatry with the Blood Republic. We are wishing to commence our chemical industry to higher levels. Consider trade for our oil, our fish, our chemicals, our guns and other items of note.

The Blood Republic is happy to normalise relations with another power, and shall be willing to export some of its high-end medical equipment.

The United Kingdom of the Netherlands and Great Britain and the Kingdom of London announce that they will officially join the ARMS organization.

Aden and Malay jointly welcome the UKGBN to the ARMS Treaty.

 

[Mosher]

The Coronation of Charles van Rot I, Emperor of the Dutch, King of Scotland, England, and Norway

On the day of our Lord August 7, 2509, our Lord Emperor Charles van Rot I, Emperor of the Dutch, King of Scotland and England, and Duke of Norway has been declared the Emperor of Great Britain and Ireland, by the people of the Netherlands and the Will of God.
In a great, monstrous cathedral there stood a crowd of nearly 2,000 viewing his coronation as Emperor of all the Britains with another crowd of 20,000 outside crowding the streets, he donned his crown of pure white gold, studded with the finest jewels.

 

[NinjaCow64]

We second Indonesia's bid for UN Secretariat if it isn't disbanded before the elections finish. Which would be bad.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

When the standing Secretary General of the Union of Nations calls for the dissolution of his own organization, a number of questions arises. Questions such as, "Has internationalism failed?"; "Does a common law exist?"; "What new world order will rise to replace it?"; &c.

Chief among my questions is, "How in the hell did the collective political establishment of this world remain asleep at the wheel for ten years?"

Nations <redacted> and moan about concerted efforts at political and economic repression, campaigns of mass murder, and the disproportionate power of various alliance blocs, all the while squandering an organ that might very well be able to deal with these difficulties. Instead of manning up and trying to confront these problems like mature adults, they insist the best solution is to deregulate everything in the logical diplomatic extension of corporate neoliberalism. Well, my friends, Guinea is a standing testament to the logical consequence of riding down those tracks at full throttle.

The UN has been horribly neglected, both by its member states and its own leadership. Turning it around is simply a question of willpower. I believe that Guinea's position of neutrality gives it a unique opportunity to spearhead a revitalization of the UN mandate, which is why I propose that we submit for the consideration of General Secretary FEGELEIN!!

No, strike that from the record! He interrupted me!

God damn it, I said cut it out!

No, you dumb sack of <redacted>! I've already decided! Shut up and let me finish!

Like I was saying, I propose that we submit FOR <redacted>'S SAKE GÖRING PUT THAT THING AWAY!

I said-

...

PATRICK EKUNDAYO. ALL IN FAVOUR? GOOD, THANK YOU, NOW GET THE <redacted> OUT OF MY OFFICE.

 

[Daedwartin]

we Argee Guinea. why is the ,aim body devoted to ensuring international peace not doing anything to stop the bloodshed. they did nothing to organize a response to Russia's imperialism, they did nothing to respond to the three acts of imperialism of Aden, it did nothing to even try and diffuse Africa. It did nothing really to stop anything, is this the League of Nations 2.0 your in? A stronger UN is needed, one that everyone can trust to maintain peace.

OOC: why is the foundation, one of the most unethical groups( abite with good reason: no one wants the world to end), one of the few voices that support international peace enough to be vocal about it. At least clef made sure those damn scientists at [REDACTED] got due punishment for That test goddamn it. Repairing everything so human civilization...what repairs: this is the repair of the damn escape. At lea the vaults are untouched. How the hell we have enough funding to survive...meh, that's why most our stuff was self-sufficient and why we aren't allowed to use any resources other than our own gathered ones.

 

[Tani Coyote]

Malay gives thanks to its war being ignored. It was, after all, merely unifying the Southeast Asian peoples for a glorious future. Co-braaaaa!

Costa Rica likewise is grateful its act of retribution against Jacob Black's forces is accepted as just internationally.

 

[Jehoshua]

Malay gives thanks to its war being ignored. It was, after all, merely unifying the Southeast Asian peoples for a glorious future. Co-braaaaa!

Costa Rica likewise is grateful its act of retribution against Jacob Black's forces is accepted as just internationally.

ooc: both being under Tropican oversight, thankfully with regards to my general secretariat we simply had the (finally over) war between the Blood Empire and Namibia (with the party in the wrong being quite self-evidently the blood empire) and the Russian thing (which I tried to resolve bilaterally, with Poland eventually acquiescing to the Russian backstab as a fait accompli).

Oh and I suppose Adens recent conquest of Ormuz, but that was overshadowed by the Spammer Question

 

[NinjaCow64]

Breaking News! Religious Schisms in the Spammer's Crusade!

The Catholics are becoming increasingly polarised within the Spammer's Crusade. On one hand the Pope has practically denounced the Spammer's Crusade. On the other hand, a large majority of the citizens of the Crusade including the Catholics are very pleased with the government. This has left many Catholics confused and unsure who to follow. Until today.

The highly popular Cardinal of Spamalta, Paa R. Noid, came home today and announced that he was visited by Jesus in his sleep while he was in Rome. Jesus told him that the Pope and almost the entire College of Cardinals were dead and the people pretending to be the Pope and the Cardinals were actually twelve-foot tall shapeshifting lizards who eat babies. According to his dream, the lizards took over the Papacy to start an international baby trade so they could get the finest babies to eat. Jesus then asked Paa R. Noid if he was man enough to save the Catholic Church and declare himself the true Pope, which he proceeded to do when he came home.

A surprising number of Spammer Catholics have accepted Paa R. Noid, now going under the title of his Holiness Nodius I, as the true Pope, citing the recent tensions between the Spammer's Crusade and the Papacy in Rome as proof that the Papacy has lost it's way. Due to the mass exodus and conversion of Catholics, a recent census has reported that less than one percent of the nation identify as "Pius Catholics", and 24% of people identifying as "Noidist Catholics".

[TABLE="head"]Faith|% pop.
Cat Worship|32%
Judaism|26%
Nodist Catholics|24%
Sunni Islam|15%
Other|3%[/TABLE]
2509 Census Results

Glorious Leader of the Spammer’s Crusade Kenji Bovine has neither supported nor denied the claims of Noidus I due to the separation of church and state, although he has stated that Nodius I's claims would "explain a lot".

On the steps the "New Vatican", an abandoned diner repurposed to be the head of the Noidist Catholic Church, Noidus I called a press conference where he was showing off his new Papal Gear, including a hat made entirely from Tin Foil. He answered many questions about the organisation of his Church and also gave a statement on his opinion war against the Papal States.

"There is no need for war against the Papal States." said Noidus I "God will smite the Lizards, of that there is no doubt, although how is another question. God has not shown me his plan for me or the people of the Spammer's Crusade, however if he decides that we need to take an active role in destroying the Lizards then I will do as God tells me."

 

[Ailedhoo]

The Imperium is amused by the rise of this heretic preist and his false path. Magnus himself is reminded illy of his father Gilmore's own attempts to impose himself above the Pope and how it ended for him in the end.

The Imperium of Man denounces Noidus I and declares the fake form of Catholicism that Noidus preaches has no place in the realm of the Empire of Man.

God bless the Imperium of Man as the Heavens blesses the Pope Pius XXV who is the true symbol of the Lord's work!

 

[NinjaCow64]

The Imperium is amused by the rise of this heretic preist and his false path. Magnus himself is reminded illy of his father Gilmore's own attempts to impose himself above the Pope and how it ended for him in the end.

The Imperium of Man denounces Noidus I and declares the fake form of Catholicism that Noidus preaches has no place in the realm of the Empire of Man.

God bless the Imperium of Man as the Heavens blesses the Pope Pius XXV who is the true symbol of the Lord's work!

Pope Noidus I comments that he "feels sorry for the Imperium of Man" as their head of state's family is being held hostage by the Lizards. It is the only answer as to why the Imperium would stand by the false Pope. Pope Noidus I feels sorry that the Lizards assassinated your father and that you are being threatened by the Lizards, it is the only reason that the Imperium would stand by the Lizards now that they know the truth.

 

[Ailedhoo]

Pope Noidus I comments that he "feels sorry for the Imperium of Man" as their head of state's family is being held hostage by the Lizards. It is the only answer as to why the Imperium would stand by the false Pope. Pope Noidus I feels sorry that the Lizards assassinated your father and that you are being threatened by the Lizards, it is the only reason that the Imperium would stand by the Lizards now that they know the truth.

You further insult the true Pope Pius XXV by slander of claiming it was His Holiness that assassinated Gilmore Flanagon?! Gilmore may have forsaken himself from the church of the Lord but His Holiness would never take such tactics as assassination! The mear fact you are stating such lies shows the world how pitiful the heretic will of Noidus I is!

 

[NinjaCow64]

You further insult the true Pope Pius XXV by slander of claiming it was His Holiness that assassinated Gilmore Flanagon?! Gilmore may have forsaken himself from the church of the Lord but His Holiness would never take such tactics as assassination! The mear fact you are stating such lies shows the world how pitiful the heretic will of Noidus I is!

Pope Noidus I says that no, Pope Pius XXV did not assassinate Gilmore Flanagon. The Lizard that killed Pope Pius XXV and is now pretending to be the Pope assassinated your father. To make such an error shows that you are really of the true faith and you are just pretending to worship the Lizards. Don't worry, if you are truly faithful God will strike down the Lizards and you will be free to practice the Real Catholic Religion once again.

 

[Jehoshua]

Statement from the Holy See

-

Once again the absurdity and deception of the Spammers is self-evident. It is quite clear that this heresy is but a forced imposition on the part of the regime compelling Catholics to attend the heretical institutions of this "Noidian Antipapacy". This is not a new development in history as the existence of a "Patriotic Catholic Association", under the totalitarian regime of Communist China five centuries ago attests. Regardless, the Church outlasted and conquered that schism, and it shall outlast and conquer this one also, and it shall endure long after the Spammers Crusade has fallen into the dustbin of history, as it has done a great many empires and nations.

-

In other news the sadness of His Holiness Pope Pius XXV at the schism, and the betrayal of morality and virtue perpetrated by the Spammer regime unfortunately excacerbated a pre-existing medical condition which resulted in the popes death. Conclave proceeded and a new pope was elected, Pope Palpatinus III, named after Pope Palpatinus II (who reigned in the 23rd century) who ended the "republican" heresy which denied the doctrine of holy orders. He states his wish that in time that he may serve the Lord in cleansing the earth of this latest schism.

 

[Ailedhoo]

The Imperium of Man is in a state of morning from the death of Pius XXV. With the rise of Palpatinus III as Pope it is to be declared that Magnus Flanagon will conduct a visit to the Papal States to meet with the new Pope to talk on matters of holy pratice, of the political considerations of the world and of what to do with the heresy of the Noidian Antipapacy.

 

[NinjaCow64]

Pope Nodius I would celebrate at the death of the Lizard pretending to be a Pope, but he knows he just shape shifted into a new form to try and dishearten our resistance against your heresy. But the Catholic Church is strong, we will survive the occupation of the Lizards!

And the Government would like to note that we did not create the Nodian Catholic Church, but we do recognise it as a legitimate religion. As we do with your Catholic Church, due to Freedom of Religion. We don't pick and choose religions for our people, we let our people do that for themselves.

 

[filli_noctus]

A mysterious plague of madness has overcome many high-powered business people. The only connections between the patients are that they are all executives or directors of defence industry corporations, or in companies that are major stakeholders in the aformentioned defence corporations, and that all have demanded their doctors remove their pineal gland.

In completely unrelated news the Fraternal Order of the Brotherhood of Man has been dissolved. The former grand-master of the order, who has now revealed his name to be Malaclypse the Even Younger, Episkopos of the Golden Apple and High Guardian of the Potentially Unsacred Hot Dog Bun, declared that the organisation was "incompetent, ineffective and aneristic".
Episkopos Malaclypse then announced the re-organisation of the Fraternal Order's holdings into the Paratheo-Anametamystikhood Of Eris Esoteric, an organisation he claims is dedicated to "spreading the eristic principle to all the peoples of this world, Greyface be damned. Or not. Who cares? Anyone got a light?".
When asked to comment on the recent Catholic schism in Spammer territory Malaclypse responded that the POEE recognises the papacies of Pope Noid and Pope Palpatinus as valid, although they hope that recent reports that Pope Palpatinus intends to transform the Vatican into a fully operational battlestation are false and that the POEE will vigorously oppose the project if it true.

 

[Dem Taqat]

The UKNZ would have submitted ourselves on a platform of neutrality, but given the vast number of such candidates already in the running, we feel we would be unneccesarily splitting the vote amongst those who wish such an outcome, and shall instead Second Guinea's bid.

As to the internal conflict amongst the Catholic Church, the UKNZ government has refused to lend any official reocignition to either side of what is an entirely internal religious split, and should in no way be something for governments to intervene in. In the meantime, the vast majority of our Catholic citizens consider the claims of the new Nodian church to be 'highly unlikely at best'.

DT

 

[Mosher]

-
Pope Palpatinus III

Oh lord