Post you humourous spam e-mails here

[Narz]

Greetings to you

I've been searching for a man of my dreams, of my desire and I indeed hope
that you are that person, and I have somehow fallen hopelessly and
undeniably, though virtually in love with you. To be honest, I never thought
I would ever utter those words, but now, they come forth effortlessly and
with great sincerity. I'll be forever grateful to you if you show me just
how shallow my life was. At last, I have a chance to give it depth and
purpose.
It would probably be better to tell you this during meeting in person, eyes
to eyes, but I knew that the proper words would escape me. I wrote you this
letter instead. Please answer me http://lovegreatthing.com/waitme after you read it, and
we'll communicate.
Until I hear from you, I remain totally yours in thought and spirit.


Hugs and kisses

Olenka K.

 

[Narz]

I hadn't checked my spam folder in a while, always good for an

Subject : Your new increased pen!s will be all women's dream

No man would be happy to be told by his lady in the bedroom "Oh, it's so small!"
However, if you're afraid to hear this, don't lose hope!
MegaDik gives you an opportunity, which you surely don't want to miss out!

 

[Narz]

Another one from the same "company"

Tired of viewing explicit videos and wanking off,
because you cannot find a s'e_xy girl, who would be satisfied with your average-sized dik?
Then our offer is definitely for you!
Our MegaDick will let you add desired inches to the length of your willy and pick up any woman you wish!

And believe us, she will never feel unhappy with you!

Try it here now and see obedience to your new male power in her eyes!

 

[Narz]

Subject : 未命名

What does that mean?

 

[The Omega]

I don't have any of the email anymore, but for the past few months, I've been getting emails from a guy who thinks my name is Shannon, and that I'm somehow related to him. Is very strange.

 

[azzaman333]

 

[D'Artagnan59]

My dad gets black market male enhancement spam sometimes.

 

[uat2d]

I usually get so bad translated spam to brazilian portuguese, i laugh of the stupid stuff the spammer did and gladly i delete the message... why to get bored?

 

[Pentium]

You only have 14 spam mails? I have 526

 

[lutzj]

YOU Are A Flirt!
Someone Is Flirting Back!
Click Here to check Your Flirt Mail (Not really a link to the site)

 

[mangxema]

random subject line: Dung Eraser Bible Meat Swimming Pool Boss Staircase

 

[azzaman333]

You only have 14 spam mails? I have 526

I get roughly 10-20 a day, and I actually clean my spambox.

 

[ggganz]

My mom once got one called "Big biiger bigest". Typo included.

 

[WerBackIII]

I recived from Porn-bg. They said that I have unused registration and that they give me 10 free points. I say: WTH?

 

[Dezzilisk]

Subject : 500% more sperm
From : Lea Spears (any relation to Britney )

Once you start taking WonderCum, you will notice your sperm, stamina, and pleasure increasing within the first week.

Ive come across something like that.

SpermoMax! can increase strength, stamina and even size!

 

[Mirc]

I always get around 50 of that every day. I think even Chuck Norris is a bit jealous on me right now.

 

[Veritass]

Who wants 5x more sperm anyway? That just means I'm 5x more likely to impregnate someone. Not a problem for me, as I have had that fixed, but I know it's a concern for some of you.

 

[Cullyn]

i get versions of this scam daily..

Dear Beneficiary,

MEMO

Reconciliatory Committee
Federal Secretariat Building
7th Floor Suit 38/39
Wuse 11 Abuja-Nigeria.

SUBJECT: FOREIGN VICTIMS COMPENSATION.

For introduction purposes, I am Barrister Alfred C. Jones, secretary
to the above mentioned Committee.

In the recent past a lot of complaints have been going on around the
Globe concerning some Foreigners who lost their hard-earned Monies
either in the form of uncompleted Contracts or victims of swindlers.

considering the fact that a higher proportion of their complaints
points to Africa, and Nigeria is mostly affected. The Government
deemed it necessary to verify these reports with the view to make
adequate reconciliation by paying compensations (Amount lost)to the
affected victim like you respectively.

We have forwarded this memo to you because your name falls among the
shortlisted presented to us for urgent and necessary attention.This
initiative was borne out of Government desire to boost its campaign
against corruption in the Country and for Nigeria to have her
rightful place in the comity of Nations.

Now when you respond to this email, you will be directed to the
paying bank where your payment will come from. Ours is to make a
re-commendation.Do not delay to contact us as soon as you receive
this letter to enable us expedite action for the payment of your lost
amount immediately.

Above all, a processing fee of $150 Dollars only is needed for
computing of your info. which will eventually be forwarded to the
paying bank where your payment shall come from.

Yours Sincerely,
Barr.Alfred C. Jones
Secretary to the Committee.

________________________________________
PeoplePC Online
A better way to Internet
http://www.peoplepc.com

 

[The Yankee]

Re: Search Results - Visa Card for you!

If you'd like to be removed / opt-out from our email list, please click here.

Then a picture of a sports car and telling me how I can get a Visa with crap credit in just seconds.

 

[The Yankee]

Not exclusively spam, but spam-related. Sometimes I get spam merely because I was a customer somewhere and the list got sent/sold to someone else. Thus, I've taken to check "professional" spam mail (not the ones with the stupid misspellings to get around the filter) to see if there's an unsubscribe button. Well, here's the message I got after putting one in:

Unsubscribe

Thank you, but you have previously unsubscribed. Please allow up to up 7-10 days for processing from the time you unsubscribed.

When did I land in the banana republic of the Internet?