Random Rants LIII: F My Life

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I realized I was falling in love with a girl as we were talking and I saw her becoming less physically unattractive with every passing hour, which is kind of a strange feeling as your mind see the results change but the parameters of the equation do not. (starting from a point where she was not my type at all and zero alcohol involvement) This is bad. I cannot psychologically afford this right now.
 
All this language talking is why my goal is to master all six UN languages. My French needs some work but I can pass with a B2 which is really more a B1, and I did some Russian last semester which I plan on following up from this summer onwards.

Also: Trinity courses to get a Teacher of English as a Foreign Language title are so effing expensive. If I take one, it would most probably delay my planned visit to Oz by a year or more.
 
And why the hell would anyone want to go to Australia?
 
Well, I always wanted to live upside down. It also makes life more exciting, of course. Who knows when something deadly will inadvertedly deal a fatal blow to you. Last but not least I'd love to see Ayer's Rock. Although hearing the local accent is a motivation too. I absolutely love it.
 
I realized I was falling in love with a girl as we were talking and I saw her becoming less physically unattractive with every passing hour, which is kind of a strange feeling as your mind see the results change but the parameters of the equation do not. (starting from a point where she was not my type at all and zero alcohol involvement) This is bad. I cannot psychologically afford this right now.

What's so bad about that?

If things had gone right when your ancestors came to borrow some bicycles, that wouldn't be the case.

I'm sure the bicycles were not a problem.

Oh God they're playing gangnam style now. This is the part where I regret they frisk you for a gun at these places.

Since he's now gone offline, I suppose he's daning :D.
 
What's so bad about that?

I have a lot of projects and work-exp I'm doing right now. Having a girl walking around my head is very distracting for me. Plus she is the friend of an ex-gf (who is like kind of a weird best friend/sister like/ex-lover thing) who loves to set me up with her friends and then goes ballistic jealous when we hit it off. If I want to reach her I have to go through her. I must resist the temptation otherwise it will spiral into a klasterfrakken ja.
 
Learn French from the Lebanese Arabs, then. :D

Too bad my great-grandmother is long dead, else she'd probably fit the bill, being a Lebanese teacher around the 1920s.

I'm just not interested in Indian, Mesoamerican, or most Romance languages. But perhaps I could find some jobs as an interpreter/translator if I learned my favorite languages, since there would be so little competition (relatively speaking).

Also, a rant: I couldn't meet that certain lady today, since I was detained at a family Easter party. I hardly ever have chances to see her.

And on an unrelated note, I don't like perfect people. We all know one or two. Can't stand them, though it's not their fault. I really shouldn't dislike them, but I can't help it.
 
EDIT: Wrong thread.
 
You don't feel at least sometimes sad?

I have a lot of projects and work-exp I'm doing right now. Having a girl walking around my head is very distracting for me. Plus she is the friend of an ex-gf (who is like kind of a weird best friend/sister like/ex-lover thing) who loves to set me up with her friends and then goes ballistic jealous when we hit it off. If I want to reach her I have to go through her. I must resist the temptation otherwise it will spiral into a klasterfrakken ja.

I see the problems.
Your decision if it's worth it.


Sort of related: I'm right now fully self-confident that I'll ask out that one girl tomorrow after the language class, but the problem is now that I can't concentrate on anything else ^^. Tomorrow will be awful.
 
I miss school.
 
Spoiler pointlessly long, rambling rant that you'll tear apart :
Fear of AI is pretty irrational in my opinion. You ask what becomes of humans when AIs can out-think us? I don't think it will ever get to that point because I see humans uploading their consciousness into a digital world before we create sapient machines. First-gen mind-machine interfaces are already being prototyped and once that is achieved it's not that big of a leap from mind-machine interfaces to uploading your consciousness.

I also think people fear advancing technology because people just simply fear change. Being able to upload our consciousness into a digital world would fundamentally change what it means to be human and I think people don't want to give up their bodies yet. Of course I don't understand why anyone wouldn't want to give up a body that ages and dies for a life of immortality. I think a big part of that is that a vast majority of people still think that our physical form defines who we are; instead of seeing our bodies for what they really are: a mere vessel that carries our true self around. What all this advancing technology will eventually allow us to do is upgrade our hardware so to speak.
Assuming that all technology is good and necessary and that older ways are inferior and stupid is madness, in my opinion. Ultimately, after survival, basically everything is done with an aim for happiness (as long as it doesn't harm anyone) or the avoidance of unhappiness. I play video games because I enjoy them, I go to college so I can have a better chance of getting my "dream" job because that'd make me happy. A very charitable person might volunteer most of their spare time because they get a kick out of helping people. Survival of self and species as well as happiness are the goals, but it's easy to forget.

I'm reminded of the parable of the fisherman and the CEO. The fisherman lives near the beach, works a few hours a day, and spends the rest of his time relaxing. A wealthy CEO on vacation meets him and learns about the fisherman's life. The CEO tells the fisherman that he should work sunup to sundown, use the extra money to buy a bigger boat and more nets, and keep investing until he has millions. The fisherman asks why. So you can live near the beach, work a few hours a day, and spend the rest of your time relaxing, the CEO says. He's completely missing the point.

And could a machine really ever "enjoy" anything? Moreover, if we're uploading our consciousnesses, might we be committing suicide and creating a precise digital copy of ourselves? It could be no more "us" than a twin, and we'd have no way of knowing.

To me, "life," or rather, existence, as a machine or program or packet of electronic data is completely devoid of meaning. What's the point? Why do anything? You don't need to eat or sleep, your "loved ones" are little more than glorified computer files, and you're missing out on a lot of physical sensations. Our brains have evolved to be parts of people and to grow up in a society of people, not machines. I, for one, am quite happy to be a human. I embrace it, and I like my body. It's an integral part of me. It is me. I love going for horseback rides and float trips, feeling the wind and sun, feeling the recoil and shock of a gunblast, and so on. I like that I'm fundamentally an animal which can communicate with and relate to other animals. These things are "practical" for me because they help me accomplish my goal of happiness.

Few things bother me more than the suggestion that all change is progress and improvement. Technology won't make us any happier. I'd argue that people had all the things they needed to be truly happy thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of years ago. You might counter that they also led shorter, unhealthier, more painful lives. I'd say that's a valid point, but I'd counter that if, hypothetically, there were no disease, needless fighting, or oppression then, life would have been pretty good. That's because humans, like other animals, can be pretty happy if they have certain sets of requirements met. Cats are happy with fresh water, fresh meat, and something to chase. Horses are happy with plenty of fodder, a place to run, and other horses to live with. People are happy if they get the basics, enough exercise, feel like valuable and accepted members of a community, love and are loved, have avenues of self-expression, and have something to wonder at and something to live for.

These broad categories have never changed. They may mean different things to different people, but they never go obsolete. People don't suddenly lose the need for social acceptance just because some new technology comes out, nor were all people everywhere miserable until the TV was invented. If that were the case, then we'd get happier with each passing year and each purchase of some new technology, but we don't, not necessarily. People are still nasty to each other, they can still feel lonely and without purpose, they still commit suicide, riot, complain, and suffer from depression. There are alternative means of being happy. The Amish seem no less happy than the rest of us, despite their simpler lifestyle. They don't need much technology to be happy. Strong social bonds and a sense of purpose and belonging are good enough for them. A lot of us lack one or both, and those are holes that no inventions can fill.

It seems to me that when our society changes, it tends to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Everything, good or bad, is replaced. I'd rather we focus more on fixing problems and deleting the negatives and less on adding new abilities. Life with immersive virtual reality and omnipresent Wi-Fi might be nice, but life without infectious or genetic diseases would be better. And the more society changes, the more people get left behind. The elderly used to be valuable and respected members of society with plenty of good advice, but now society changes so rapidly that any advice they might have is probably totally outdated. They're seen as out of touch relics with absurd, quaint views, and it doesn't help that we shove them into retirement homes to go away and die rather than keeping them around to help raise the grandchildren. The younger generations mock them, seemingly unaware that they too will probably be ridiculed, ignored, and abandoned as everything they know and love disappears.

Anyway, I worry that people are powerfully attracted to new technologies without carefully considering whether they're ultimately beneficial in achieving the goals of survival and happiness. If "you" "lived" as a machine, would you really enjoy it? Could you enjoy it? Could you feel anything? Why would you "live?" What's the point? I live because it's the default choice, I see little need to change it, and even if I did, I'd have a hard time doing so. "Transcending," on the other hand, is a conscious decision, unlike being born. Why make that decision? I see little need for it. Probably it'd just end up being the rich who transcend and live forever while everyone else continues to live and die in a world where people have been made obsolete. Making people obsolete in everything completely defeats the purpose of progress, but people will call it that anyway and mock anyone who prefers human labor and human life. Eventually, most people become machines and those who don't get killed off eventually since they can't compete. The human race goes extinct, having collectively committed suicide in an ill-conceived plan to turn into machines. Only machines and post-humans remain, existing, for no reason.

It absolutely horrifies me. I lose sleep fearing that the whole human race will short-sightedly commit suicide in a desperate, blind, unreasoning quest for an artificial existence of artificial pleasure. Transhumanism/posthumanism/transcendence is one of my biggest fears by far, and I worry about it all the time. I mean it. It sneers at and regards as inferior thousands of generations of humans, it sees them as unclean and primitive, and tries to eliminate and replace them with "superior" models, without ever really stopping to think about what standards it's using, and to what end it's aiming. People are already proudly predicting that there will be no need for human contact anymore, as though that's in any way a good thing, and they'll just lead "lives" of "endless pleasure." Think on this: If we could, should the whole human race just hook itself up to some pods that put us in a dreamlike state and pump us full of drugs that artificially stimulate the parts of our brain controlling happiness and automatically make us "happy" no matter what? Is that really living? Is it really happiness? What's the point? How is transcendence any different? How's it any different from the human race doing nothing but masturbate endlessly?

To be fair, the idea of immortality is intriguing. But what would you do with few dozen billion people who won't die? I'd like it best if there were some limited number of people who would get reincarnated. The population of the world would be big enough to be interesting and full of diversity, but small enough not to overtax resources or destroy the environment. We'd get to enjoy human life, we'd get to be kids again, and death wouldn't be a permanent end to everything. Too bad this is an impossible dream.

But why bother. People will just call me a stupid primitive old-fashioned sentimental Philistine who's standing in the way of the Unstoppable March of Progress. Everything I love--nature, living with nature, some forms of traditions, people being valuable and accepted members of society-- is being destroyed. There's no future. But what do you care, I'm just some stupid ape.
 
I grew up with black and white television (3 channels) and there was no such thing as a video game. I should have been miserable right?

We had no air conditioning. At granny's I'd haul coal in a bucket and draw water from the well with a hand crank. I should have been miserable right?

Most every teacher at school had a wooden paddle and they used them. A lot. McDonalds was a farm. There was no such thing as fast food or microwave popcorn. I should have been miserable right?

We had to go to church every Sunday and after to granny's for dinner. Eight families, husbands and wives...30 something people and you had to stand in line to get a plate and eat on the porch.
I should have been miserable right?

I wasn't. I was looking forward to the future. Turns out the future is a lonely place. Beep. Beep. Beep.

At least I have my phone and these pills.
 
I grew up with black and white television (3 channels) and there was no such thing as a video game. I should have been miserable right?

We had no air conditioning. At granny's I'd haul coal in a bucket and draw water from the well with a hand crank. I should have been miserable right?

Most every teacher at school had a wooden paddle and they used them. A lot. McDonalds was a farm. There was no such thing as fast food or microwave popcorn. I should have been miserable right?

We had to go to church every Sunday and after to granny's for dinner. Eight families, husbands and wives...30 something people and you had to stand in line to get a plate and eat on the porch.
I should have been miserable right?

I wasn't. I was looking forward to the future. Turns out the future is a lonely place. Beep. Beep. Beep.

At least I have my phone and these pills.

:old:

It's not lonely if you know where to look
 
Not really. Generally it's a feeling of emptiness rather than sadness.

Man, get yourself fixed.

Sort of related: I'm right now fully self-confident that I'll ask out that one girl tomorrow after the language class, but the problem is now that I can't concentrate on anything else ^^. Tomorrow will be awful.

Has a boyfriend :mad:.
Was talking to her after the course for a half hour, and could have easily talked for the whole evening with her, but she's taken. Crap.
1 done. 3 more to go. Just more complicated to get hold of them. Damn it.


Unrelated: Why do people always ask so late for stuff?
"I have a presentation on Monday, I have nothing right now, can you give me something til Thursday?".
Thanks, yeah. No stress. At all.
Had to go to work for 1 hour after the language course to start a ton of processes, which will run the whole night, so that I can process the results tomorrow over the whole day. Great, nothing else to do right now.
*grmpf*
 
Has a boyfriend :mad:.
Was talking to her after the course for a half hour, and could have easily talked for the whole evening with her, but she's taken. Crap.

Story of my life, man. This has happened to me exactly three times, and I remember them.



In other Antilogic-related news, work has just gotten ten times worse and I'm trying to find a job so there's all that stress piled on. Oh, and I'm going to have a housing problem in August so I better straighten out what I'm doing otherwise I'll be homeless.
 
I hate having to read a book for class that's obviously written by a partisan hack. Constantly arguing with the author in my mind gets tiring.

Also, after patiently waiting for two months for a CD, I was informed that the store couldn't obtain it. The songs are not sold on iTunes to my knowledge, and it seems my only alternative is tor order it from individuals in Europe.

And there was yet another case of some people at the local metro station taking someone's cell phone from them. Add to this the beggars and it's not making me want to use the Metro that much. But I have no car or any intention of getting one unless I absolutely have to.
 
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