Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[landlubber]

I recover by wiping the ring off and propose again.

 

[mythmonster2]

Fix the paper cut. (I'm back, yay!)

 

[!!!!!]

i finish seon's quest

 

[Darth Caesar]

I go public with my masterpiece!

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Read it!

16: "Disable the time bomb before the ship makes port."

Nyarlathothep, be with me! I further summon the essences of Azathoth, Yog-Sothoth, Shub-Niggurath, and Yag-Sathath into my body, healing me of every wound and making me the messenger of the Old Ones.

8 (9): You don't seem physically capable of that much eldritch power.

I attack my head giving myself a injury which results in me Seeing Double (can submit 2 quest actions)

9 (8): Your helmet shields your skull.

I use my Infinity Sword to cause Seon to fail, and to also apply a buff/modifier that brings all of his rolls down by 10.

17: The arcane power of Infinity disrupts Seon's bond with Nyarlathotep, disabling the bonus his negative SAN gives to carrying out the orders of the Eldritch Abominations.

I recover by wiping the ring off and propose again.

3 (4): Its slips out of your hand and DOWN YOUR THROAT!
ROLL TO GAG!
17: You cough it up and it arcs in the air. You watch in slow motion as it slips onto her finger. She doesn't take it off, but can't say she accepts because she's laughing so hard from the whole display.

Fix the paper cut. (I'm back, yay!)

6 (15): You patch yourself up 25 hitpoints.

i finish seon's quest

7 (5): Simply imagining summoning the Eldritch Abomination damages you -14 hitpoints.

I go public with my masterpiece!

13: It's not much, given the state of affairs on the ship, but you net $60 in sales.

Bagel Man shifts his weight back and forth between his... buns.
ROLL TO DODGE!
10: CivGeneral suffers 7 damage.

 

[Verarde]

I apply heat with my Infinity Sword to my Phoenix egg to cause it to hatch.

 

[Seon]

I cast Recover.

 

[Abaddon]

I squint and try to look crossed eyed until I gain Seeing Double

 

[!!!!!]

i heal

 

[Darth Caesar]

I continue working at my pizzeria.

 

[landlubber]

I now ask again if she wants to marry me.

 

[civplayah]

Great!

I'll disable the bomb.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I apply heat with my Infinity Sword to my Phoenix egg to cause it to hatch.

20: In a dazzling display of fiery brilliance, the Firebird emerges.

I cast Recover.

20 (18): You steal the life force of Abaddon, !!!!!, civplayah, and Verarde to heal yourself 400 hitpoints.

I squint and try to look crossed eyed until I gain Seeing Double

12: You manage to confuse yourself into seeing twice the available information.

i heal

12 (15): You restore 60 hitpoints.

I continue working at my pizzeria.

4: You lean your elbow on the element, suffering a -15 hp burn.

I now ask again if she wants to marry me.

12 (13): "Yes."

I'll disable the bomb.

4: You're gonna need a few things first, like
* A defusal kit,
* Explosives training,
* And the whereabouts of the bomb.

 

[Abaddon]

Damnit!!! 12 is STRAIGHT FORWARD SUCCESS! Eugh, why do you taunt me with your whims... and Seon's 18 is suddenly super awesome AND detremental to everyone

I sulk

 

[Verarde]

I order my Phoenix to attack Seon, while attacking Seon myself with JUSTICE my Sword.

 

[Darth Caesar]

I call 911.

 

[!!!!!]

civplayah-landlubber hybrid plasma attack seon

mythmonster2 i need healing

 

[Seon]

I corrupt the Phoenix to become an eldritch abomination of crawling armored floating fungi with tentacles, all trying to kill veralde.

 

[civplayah]

Okay- I'll start with the explosives training.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I sulk

3: "Everything's great! Yes! I'm king of the world! HAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHA!!"
You feel your sanity slip a notch.

I order my Phoenix to attack Seon, while attacking Seon myself with JUSTICE my Sword.

5 (9): He dodges, cackling diabolically.

I call 911.

12: Sure you make the call, but it'll take the ambulance a while to arrive, travelling through space and all.

civplayah-landlubber hybrid plasma attack seon

20: The vial breaks, and the hybrid blood reacts quite violently to the possessed evil that is Seon, dealing a grisly -30 hp/turn as it seems to literally burn the eldritch taint out of him.

I corrupt the Phoenix to become an eldritch abomination of crawling armored floating fungi with tentacles, all trying to kill veralde.

13 (10): Hm. The gods don't seem to be answering.

Okay- I'll start with the explosives training.

5 (6): The chemical trainer explodes in your face, burning your eyes for 7 damage.

Bagel Man begins rolling back and forth across CivGeneral.
ROLL TO DODGE!
12: It's actually somewhat relaxing.