The Complications Of Being Captain2

[Captain2]

Just looking for thoughts and advice here. I've been away for a bit while I worked on finishing my course at the college, I'm now officially a Social Service Worker. I don't think I'm that interested in actually pursuing the line of work but it is an option if need be and if nothing else it can be argued that when speaking with an employer I can say it shows that I can work with a wide range of customers.

I've been out of my placement for roughly four days, not including the weekend. My Dad says that I have until the end of may to find a job or else I'm going to be kicked out. Now comes decision time.

I owe roughly 8000 dollars in student loans, I have about 3500 dollars saved up to pay it down once they begin asking me for payments. My Dad is advising that I stay at home to pay down the debt for a year which I understand and find entirely reasonable. I don't want to begin slinging mud at the poor fellow because for all of his faults he's been pretty good throughout the years, its just that he still treats me as though I'm a teenager when I am in fact sadly a twenty two year old, I'd probably be fine with staying and paying it off if I felt as though I had freedom.

On the other hand I have my girlfriend of a year who I have been friends with for over six years prior, she wants me to move to Ottawa (substantially more employment opportunities than my small town) and get a place with her. To be entirely honest I feel like I want to do this as well.

The only problem is I have my two dominant traits arguing with one another, on one side there's the practical "pay off your debts. Its free at your dads. Live on the cheap" side and on the other there's my less practical side saying "you're twenty two! start your life! Establish your independence! you have an amazing girlfriend who wants to live with you, go for it!"

I guess I'm just looking for thoughts. I'm internally fighting myself.

Edit: Yes the title is being dramatic, it made me laugh when I came up with it.

 

[peter grimes]

I don't know how it works in Canada, but when I was paying off my student loans in the US the smart course would be to take a lump sum (your 3500) and use that NOT on the loans, but on establishing yourself in the world - whether that means moving to a city with good job prospects or financing more education....

Just remember that if you and she have a good relationship then delaying moving in together for a year while you pay off your loans isn't going to change anything in the long run. If you don't have a good relationship, then you'll find out . And better to find out sooner rather than later, when you're sharing an apartment....

 

[Murky]

I'd move in with the girlfriend, get a job and make regular payments on the student loans.

 

[Synobun]

You have significantly more opportunity if you moved to Ottawa. It is not as cheap as living with your father, but staying in a small town will drastically reduce your chances at getting a good job that can fund your success.

If I was in your position, I would move. You are closer to your girlfriend, you are finally leaving the nest, and you have more opportunities.

 

[Silurian]

If there are no good prospects in your town and spend a year there paying back your loan with a less well paid job and cheap accommodation where will your career be in a year.

When you move you will find yourself competing with recent graduates.

 

[BvBPL]

Move in with your girlfriend, or at least out from under your dad's thumb.

You'll be amazed at how much better your relationship with your father will be after a few months of living on your own.

 

[azzaman333]

If you're confident you can get a good job by moving to Ottawa, do it.

 

[sophie]

Girlfriend. No Parents. Cool town. Better job opportunities. Your own place.

I really don't see what the debate is here.

 

[Antilogic]

It sounds great to be out on your own or with your girl at first, but if you don't get a job then you are a deadbeat mooching off your girlfriend--not exactly a glamorous life.

From my experiences moving out, and those of my brother, I recommend getting job offers [in Ottawa if possible], and coming up with a payment plan to show your parents if they keep bugging you about what you are going to do. Show that with an average income in the field you want to go into, putting X to rent, Y to food, and Z towards paying down your debt, you can accomplish a debt paydown in a reasonable length of time. Sure, it's tentative, but it shows you are thinking responsibly, and it will put your parents' worries to rest if you choose the Ottawa option.

Just remember that relationships with your parents are always strained right before you move out on your own--I'm sure they are just concerned about your future well-being. Your dad is trying to give you a kick in your pants to get you looking for a job.



Fun story: my grandfather bought my dad a car when he graduated college. Oh wait, it was just the down payment. My dad then had to pay the monthly payment right off the bat, along with all maintenance on the vehicle. Got him looking for a job real quick as his savings started shrinking.

 

[Samson]

How far are you from Ottawa, ie. are you in a possition to look for work in Ottawa before moving out, and travel there for interviews? If so, that is what I would do, while also exploring oportunities closer to home.

If you ended up moving to Ottawa and not getting a job that could put the sort of finacial preasure on a relationship that you really do not want.

 

[CivCube]

Keep looking for jobs in the cities you're interested in. A higher income that can pay the monthly bills is the top priority. What's equally important is that you lay the foundation for the career you want, so make sure the city you're in has plenty of opportunities for networking.

Sounds like you're also a social worker. Check out the national association's website and look for seminars: http://www.casw-acts.ca/ You can show up and get lots of contact information from like-minded people.