#~~ The HEhe HAha Joke Thread ~~#

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A trucker's stop is snowed in at a mountain pass. After a couple of days, the lone waitress felt so bad about what she'd been doing that she killed herself.

A couple days later, the truckers felt so bad about what they'd been doing that they burried her.
 
Bin Laden's latest message!



Since the media tend lately to speak of Osama bin laden less and less, and some suggest that he is dead, Osama decieds to send Bush a personal letter - just to show that he's still in the game. The letter is indeed delivered, but as usual the staffers open it - after carefully checking it for anthrax or explosives. But - it is a coded message:

"37OHSSV O773H"

The letter must be deciphered before it is given to the president, so it gets handed to the CIA. Two days later the agency admits defeat. Now the NAS gets a crack at it - no go! In their desparation, the aid give Bush the letter as it is, but he is also stymied.

And then someone suggest sending it to MI6......... an hour after faxing it they get their answer: 'turn it upside down!'


:lol:
 
The ambassador of a small African nation chanced to visit Russia, and was entertained by his opposite number, the Russian ambassador. For three days, the African ambassador was wined, dined, and generally treated to the best hospitality that Russia had to offer. On the final day of his visit, the Russian ambassador said "As your stay is coming to an end, it is time for you to play our traditional game, Russian roulette. One of the six chambers of this gun is loaded - you spin the cylinder, point the gun at your head, and pull the trigger." This phased the African slightly, but he was a proud man of a warrior people, and to show fear would be unthinkable. Both men took their guns, spun, and pulled the triggers. Both chambers were empty, and both ambassadors breathed a sigh of relief. The African ambassador was much impressed with the courageous game, and thought hard about the subject before the Russian Ambassador was due to visit his country the next year. When the visit came, the African ambassador treated the Russian with all hospitality, until the final day of his stay. Leading him to a private room in the palace, the African ambassador spoke "Now it is time for you to sample our game, African roulette". So saying, he led the Russian into the room, the only occupants of which were six beautiful, naked women. The African ambassador said "These women are the most beautiful members of one of our tribes. Any one of them will provide you with oral sex - take your pick". The Russian was not entirely averse to this idea, but he couldn't see the connection with Russian Roulette. He said "Well, ok, great, but where's the roulette part? Where's the danger?" With a big grin on his face, the African ambassador Answered, "One of them is a cannibal"
 
Me too. AIDS would've been a better punchline.
 
Q: What's the hit toy in Sweden this christmas?

A: A two-piece jigsaw puzzle.
 
How do you make a Swede crazy?

Bring him to a round room and say:"Go and take that wallet in the corner!"
 
A new young monk arrives at the monastery.

He is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand.

He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript.

So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up.

In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.

The head monk, says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son."

So, he goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscript is held as archives in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years.

Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot.

So, the young monk gets worried and goes downstairs to look for him.

He sees him banging his head against the wall, and wailing "We forgot the "R", We forgot the "R" His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying uncontrollably.

The young monk asks the old abbot, "What's wrong, father?"

With a choking voice, the old abbot replies, "The word is celebrate." "The word is celebRate."
 
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