The Injury Thread.

[D'Artagnan59]

1. Bad back for a week.

Kid was going to jump. I was in the water and swimming. Immediately, this guy comes, and then BAM! He lands right on my back.

2. Bruised knee.

I step into the Scout-style dock in the gap. I lift it up and am carried to the nurse. At the end, I'm better.

3. Sprained arm.

Me and friends are playing manhunt at a Relay for Life. All of a sudden, the 16-year-old coming along with us body-slams me onto the ground. I land on my arm. I try to get up and fall down again. I go to the emergency room and wear a splint for 2 weeks.

4. Sprained wrist.

Three days after the arm was at 100%, I went to the inflatable rides. You know that game where you're supposed to tug-of-war to get 3 balls to the "touchdown line" to win? Fall wrist-first. I leave. I wear a splint for a week.

 

[Whomp]

Mine are all sports related. Just broken bones and stitches.

I guess the best one was getting whacked on my glove hand by my coach with a fungo while taking infield practice. When that healed I came back and two days later took a foul tip off my right thumb. Junior year was over.

 

[The Yankee]

Now I'm reminded of the pinched nerves I suffered whilst playing high school football. I played through them, though I took some weekly chiropractic treatment to relieve a bit of the pressure after each week as those nerves were around my rib cage. Made having those shoulder pads on uncomfortable to say the least.

I also got my finger caught in a facemask during a practice, but it was only sore.

No broken bones, yet!

 

[Godwynn]

That's some Rocky Balboa stuff right there!

I'm sure you've been in sports at some time. Gotta do what it takes to win.

 

[CaptainF]

I'm sure you've been in sports at some time. Gotta do what it takes to win.

Indeed. Never been much of a b-balla myself, but whatever I play I lay it all out!

 

[CaptainF]

Ouch Yankee. Major ouch.

Here's mine:

I was playing goalie in an indoor soccer league my senior year. Because indoor soccer allows me to mask my glaring deficiencies as a player (no goal kicks!), and allows me showcase what I'm really good at (diving to make saves), I became a keeper of some renown.

We're playing a rival team, and we're up 2-0. I had the number of their best striker, having stopped him on a PK, and on a breakaway in the first half. I celebrated after the second save, which I guess pissed him off...

So here we are, and he gets another breakaway. What I'm supposed to do, as a goalie, is to charge the ball (make his angle smaller), then dive at it, using my chest to shield the ball. This maneuver gives the striker plenty of time to get out of my way, or worse comes to worst, he kicks me in the side, or falls over me.

I get the ball, but then he kicks me as hard as he can, out of anger, IN THE HEAD.

I wake up a few min later, on the bench (the kid is thrown out of the game). My backup promptly gives up two goals, so the coach, in an epically dumb move, sends me back into the game, even though I can barely stand.

Apparently, 2 min of me being out there, I collapse on the pitch, and wake up later in the hospital. Big concussion.

Oh wow.

If given the opportunity I would THOROUGHLY mess that dude up.

Did you take any revenge? Did the guy at least have the balls to apologize?

 

[warpus]

I broke a bone in my right hand punching a no parking sign.

It was okay though.. it was my birthday.

edit: downtown, being a soccer goalie myself, I can relate to your story. Never had anyone do that though! That deserves jail time, seriously.

 

[Colonel]

Lets see the list. No pic sorry but I can describe them pretty well.

My latest one, I popped my ankle out of place and had to jump on it to pop it back in, makeing quite possibly the nastiest sound imaginable and having three different females scream.

Then there is the 22 stiches I got when I sliced my hand with a meat slicer with a blade going 100mph. from the base of my thumb to the other end of my palm straight across, real like scary movie type stiches.

Got four staples in my head when I landed my head into the base of my old concrete support for my trampolene.

Sliced my ankle open on an inch long screw, I got to see my bone before it started bleeding, 12 stiches

Sliced the tip of my thumb off, amazingly didn't leave a scar.

Stabbed straight throw the same hand that I later sliced with the meat slicer, didn't go to the hospital but in the end it just left a barely visable scar.

Same hand I sent throw two pieces of drywall, a stud in the wall, and a cabinet mirror in my bathroom on the other side. Got 4 pieces of large glass embedded into my knuckles, about 30 small pieces literally embedded into my skin on the top of my hand, as well as sliceing off about 1/4 of an inch of flesh on the right side below my pinky, but that was done by the copper wire in the wall. (It was right above the light switch on the other side.

I cracked three ribs and broke one rib when I was boxing one of my friends (to be fair though he ended up with a dislocated shoulder, broken nose and jaw, and a spranged ankle.

Next and last one, I dislocated both my shoulders, and ever since I can pop them out of place freely.

 

[The Yankee]

Okay, I want to win "Dumbest Injury Ever." It wasn't serious, but still.

I was in the kitchen, about to head to the sink with my dishes. Somehow the knife on the plate slipped and my dumb instincts kicked in and I went to grab it. It went point down and hit, then bounced off the palm of my hand. Then, blood was gushing out of the cut, making me feel kinda ill since I sure as heck wasn't expecting that (what can I say, I'm stupid ). But it wasn't really anything other than just plain dumb. Nothing serious. I think I have a trace of a scar there, however.

 

[JohnRM]

My Dad came to pick me up at a friend's house when I was younger. I didn't know that he was bringing the motorcycle and I brushed my bare leg against the exhaust pipe. It burned my skin instantly gray like you see when you plop down a steak on a hot pan. I remember looking down and seeing the skin sliding down my leg. I still have a faint scar from that day, more than ten years ago. I don't remember it being especially painful, even though the injury was the size of a softball. I never went to the hospital for it or had any medical attention other than what I gave to myself. I am shocked that it didn't become infected, when I think about it today.

 

[nivi]

I'll match and raise you for the dumbest injury ever, I've been out all day and realy realy realy had to go to the bathroom, so I quickly went into my house and into the bathroom without even closing the door (nobody was home), and I dropped my pants fast, problem was I miscalculated the distance between me and the sink, and hit my elbow hard on the sink, it gave a realy painfull "shock" in my whole arm, but the relief of being at the bathroom made up for it. I could hardly move my arm after it.

 

[CaptainF]

Sliced the tip of my thumb off, amazingly didn't leave a scar.

I once did that to my index finger while slicing bread.

It was squirting, that's for sure.

Okay, I want to win "Dumbest Injury Ever." It wasn't serious, but still.

With all due respect I think I've clinched that title. The only reason I did what I described in the OP was sheer dumbassedness.

 

[frob2900]

Once when I was a kid, my mom had made homemade blackcurrant juice and stored it in glass bottles. Unbeknownst to me and my parents, the juice had started to ferment in some of the bottles, causing massive pressure on the inside of the glass.

I picked up one bottle to get a glass of juice and *BANG*. Glass bottle cracks violently into pieces with one heckuva noise. Luckily it didn't fragment too much, so most the damage was to my hand. My hand was cut all over with 2 really deep ones and a real nasty one just next to the veins on my wrist.

Lots of blood, emergency room etc. but it was a friday and I was back in school on monday (but I couldn't write anything since it was my right hand that was injured)

Still have scars, but my hand works just fine, so I must have lucked out w.r.t. nerve and muscle damage.

 

[Valka D'Ur]

Not my worst injury, but the one I'm dealing with right now, as I type:

Last night I got beestung -- in THREE places (head, and 2 on my right leg). I wasn't doing anything to provoke them, just trying to pay the pizza delivery guy. And now I have a headache, my leg hurts, and the itching is driving me crazy.

All I can say is, thank goodness I'm not allergic. And too, thank goodness the bees didn't sting me anywhere that would prevent me from sitting/lying down.

And when I find their hive this winter, they will need to find somebody else's yard next year!

(ghah, over 30 years without beestings... grumble, grumble... don't mind Valka, she's in a really rotten mood tonight...)

 

[Perfection]

My butt itches.

 

[Dezzilisk]

A buddy of mine was attempting to load a pump action shotgun with his hand over the barrel while it was standing vertical, blew a 50 cent peice hole in one side of his hand. The other side was almost completely gone.

Went white as a sheet and walked inside (being careful not to get blood on his mothers white carpet) and drove himself to the hospital.

 

[AL_DA_GREAT]

I fell on my bike. 6 nose fractures, broken finger, my septum was completly destroyed a new one had to be built. my face swelled up to twice its regular sieze. my right cheek was scraped to the bone. I was unconcious for several hours.

 

[Virote_Considon]

Once I fractured my right wrist at school by trapping it in a gate. I still can't straighten my fingers. Luckily for me, I'm left-handed.

 

[classical_hero]

Okay, I want to win "Dumbest Injury Ever." It wasn't serious, but still.

I was in the kitchen, about to head to the sink with my dishes. Somehow the knife on the plate slipped and my dumb instincts kicked in and I went to grab it. It went point down and hit, then bounced off the palm of my hand. Then, blood was gushing out of the cut, making me feel kinda ill since I sure as heck wasn't expecting that (what can I say, I'm stupid ). But it wasn't really anything other than just plain dumb. Nothing serious. I think I have a trace of a scar there, however.

I think I have a few that are way more dumber than that. One was when I was taking off a Coke label by cutting off the label by using a steak knife to make the cut. I was stupidly cutting along the glue, which made the work much hrader and thus I has to use more force to get it done. The other thing was that I was cutting towards the hand that was holding the bottle and once the knife cut through the paper is went straight into my hand right between the thumb sand the first finger. Those around me said that I went white as a ghost. This happened about 8 years ago, so I should have been much smarter than that.

The rest of my injuries happened while I was much younger. This one is also a candidate for a dumb injury. I was at my cousin's house playing in their cubby house out back and instead of doing the smart thing of exiting out the cubby house via the door, I tried exit out of the window. In doing so I landed on my left arm and I had a fracture as a result. This cubby house was on the ground, so it was not that far from the ground, but it is very stupid of me. But I was under 10 when I did that one.

I have yet another broken/fractured arm story that belongs in the dumb category. Me and my brother were playing on our trampoline that we had out the front of our house. The thing is that the trampoline was broken so the only way we could be on it was to walk on the frame of trampoline and I fell off it and broke my right arm.

Now I have a few accidents to tell about. I have yet another broken arm story to tell, but this is pure accident. I was in my early teens when I was riding my bike on the street when a ball (I can't remember the size of it,) got accidentally stuck underneath my front tire. Knowing the laws of physics, I just kept going when my bike suddenly stopped and I broke my left arm as a result of that fall onto the bitumen.

Now I can finally tell a story that does not involve broken bones. I was playing a game of tennis with my brother out on the front drive way. I went to play a shot and the ball hit the frame and the tennis ball struck my in the eye. As a result of the spin of the ball, it also took out a small piece of my eye. Thankfully the ball did not the seeing part of the eye. But for awhile I had to were an eye patch as a result of it.

Another eye injury that I got was when I was riding my bike in some shrub land near my old school (which now is a housing lot.) I accidentally got too close one of the shrubs, which we called a black boy (I know this is a racist term, but used it to refer to this type of tree, since when it would be burnt, it would be very dark but they would still survive the fire). I have no idea what there proper name is, so that is the name that I remember it by. Here is a "black boy" to show you what they are like.

As you can see that they have needle like spikes on them, so while I was riding my bike I got too close to the needles and it scratched my left eye. For that I had to have an eye patch for a week and at school I was called a pirate as a result. i was six at the time, since it was my first year of school.

And partially as a result of that I had problems latter on in my life with y eyes, with the cornea detaching from my eye. This would happen because my eyes were too dry and the cornea would stick to the eyelids and when I would open my eyes, the cornea would tear off. As you might imagine this was quite painful. Since my eyes are still dry I have to put in some lubricant into my eyes every night to stop it from happening. This has affected both of my eyes, but it first started with my left eye, the one that got scratched previously.

ANd now my final memory of an injury. I was about 3 or 4 years old hen I was helping my parents to recycle some old bottles. I was actually told by them not to help, but I always liked to help so I ignored there advice and I tried to carry a bottle but it was just too big for me, I dropped it and one of the shards of glass cut my left leg just a bit below my knee and on the inside. I still have the scar to prove that injury.

I hope you have enjoyed reading my injury and stupidity report.

 

[JZ_UK]

Injuries?

No breaks. ('cept a tooth... which is today still alive despite being less than half natural...)

Flesh wounds - A fall on a screw took a slice of flesh the size of an old 10p out of my knee... can't remember how old I was then but the only thing I could think to do was go find a screw driver and fix the screw down so no one else would fall on it... while bleeding quite nastily...

Burns - As a three year old I pulled a tea pot down on myself... burnt my upper arm horrendously, now all thats left is a scar visibly no more than 2cm long 5mm at its widest point though most of it is snakey and no more than 2mm wide... to be fair you literally couldn't see it if you were more than 60cm away from it lol could have been one massively nasty scar like... born under a good sign I guess