What shall we do with a drunken sailor?

[BvBPL]

What shall we do with a drunken sailor, earliee in the morning?

Throw him in bed with the captain's daughter?
Toss him in the guardhouse 'till he's sober?
Shave his balls with a rusty razor?

Please provide other suggestions. Traditional responses for your region or group that might not be found elsewhere are especially welcome.

 

[warpus]

Who cares, I'm going back to bed

 

[Lillefix]

Make him chief of Greece so we can rob'er.

 

[JollyRoger]

Don't ask, don't tell if he's a sodomizer.

 

[Borachio]

Sit him down very gently. Give him some coffee and the rest of the day off. And tell him very sternly, he's only himself to blame.

No. Hang on. I don't think this is the best.

Where's that razor gone?

edit: actually, hair of the dog might be worth a try

 

[ParkCungHee]

Bake and toast him, fry and roast him,
till beards blaze, and eyes glaze;
till hair smells and skins crack,
fat melts, and--

Wait, wrong song.

 

[Domen]

In my ship there is problem,
And the problem is the drunken sailor,
Throw the drunken sailor down the well,
So my ship can be free, so my ship can be free,
And we'll have a big party.

 

[Perfection]

There's no wrong time to be drunk on a boat.

 

[azzaman333]

Get everyone else drunk.

 

[Leonel]

Punch him in the guts and steal his money!

 

[Yeekim]

Punch him in the guts and steal his money!

Dude, what kind of a drunk sailor has money left on him?