A Corrupt Wish

[Logik]

Mosher needs to make a wish.

@OP, this thread idea isn't new, there's been about a dozen re-enactments of this already.

I never said it was as a matter of fact i explicitly said that on my 1st post that it wasn't my idea.And i searched in the forums here and no one created this kind of thread.Anyhow this is just for fun nothing more.


Now back on topic Since you and mosher forgot to make a wish i'll go on and make one to keep the spirit of the thread going.And thanks to all that have posted here so far.You guys have given me quite a few laughs.


Anyhow I wish for the the world's largest diamond

 

[W|M]

Granted. You had to kill 568 people to acquire such a diamond, and you live with the guilt for the rest of your life.

I wish for the Presidency of the United States.

When I typed 'a dozen re-enactments', I only counted the ones on CFC, not the ones elsewhere.

 

[Mosher]

Granted. The stress of the job gives you a fatal heart attack.



I wish I had a post count of fifty-thousand.

 

[Dhoomstriker]

Granted, but as you reach your goal, the Admins clue in to how much spamming you have been doing in order to get there and your account gets banned for life.

I could do with a free yet legitimate copy of Europa Universalis III (EU 3).

 

[Optical]

Granted, to buy it you have to sell your computer

I wish I wasn't ill and unable to do anything.

 

[Mosher]

Granted, you're now a zombie.

I wish I had a top-of-the-line computer.

 

[Logik]

Granted but as soon as you turn it on it catches on fire and burns half your house down.


I wish for a 6pk of beer. (To early in the morning to buy some here where i am at)

 

[Dhoomstriker]

Granted. Your buddy brings over a 6 pack this morning in exchange for 5 dollars in your local currency. However, you didn't notice that the beer was produced in 1982 until you had drunk the last can. Now you are drunk, sick to the stomach, out a 5-spot, and so angry at your buddy that you stumble into a wall, smash your face into a bloody pulp, and pass out. That'll teach you to drink in the morning.

I could do with a spot of tea.

 

[Mosher]

Granted. You are now British.

I wish Nova Scotia was part of the US.

 

[Dhoomstriker]

Granted. Nova Scotia is now not only a State, but it is the Capital State and also the only State. All former States are now demoted to US territories and lose their right to vote in US Presidential elections. Oh yeah, no one is allowed to drink Bud or Coors anymore and must drink Guinness. The entire country now worships Sidney Crosby as their national hero.

I could go for a Civ 4 Multiplayer game right about now.

 

[Dumanios]

Granted: It's with the noobiest noobs you have ever met.

I want a cheeseburger that isn't poisoned or expired.

 

[rugbyLEAGUEfan]

Granted . From a fake Chinese MacDonalds .

I wish for free first class upgrade every time I travel on a non-crashing plane.

 

[Dhoomstriker]

Granted. You take a trip to Florida and sure enough, when you get onboard the plane, you are granted a free first class seat. After a nice two week vacation lounging in the sun, you board your return flight but are surprised not to get your free first class upgrade, especially since there are several empty first class seats.

About an hour into the flight, you motion to a stewardess to ask what the deal is, but her expression simply goes ghostly pale as she seemingly stares beyond you. Turning to look, you see three men who have donned masks and are assembling plastic rifles. Suddenly, you remember the clause about only getting the upgrade on non-crashing planes and the blood starts to rush from your face, too, as you are paralyzed with fright, stuck in an awkward position as you await the dreaded and inevitable crash landing.


I could do with a new skateboard.

 

[rugbyLEAGUEfan]

]

Granted. You take a trip to Florida and sure enough, when you get onboard the plane, you are granted a free first class seat. After a nice two week vacation lounging in the sun, you board your return flight but are surprised not to get your free first class upgrade, especially since there are several empty first class seats.

About an hour into the flight, you motion to a stewardess to ask what the deal is, but her expression simply goes ghostly pale as she seemingly stared beyond you. Turning to look, you see three men who have donned masks and are assembling plastic rifles. Suddenly, you remember the clause about only getting the upgrade on non-crashing planes and the blood starts to rush from your face, too, as you are paralyzed with fright, stuck in an awkward position as you await the dreaded and inevitable crash landing.


.

Brilliant !

 

[Logik]

I wish for a new life!

 

[Dhoomstriker]

I wish for a new life!

Granted. You find yourself spending more and more time on the Civfanatics Forums. In fact, things in your old life no longer seem to interest you. You stop hanging out with your old friends. You give up on most of your sports and other exercise activities. Why go out to a movie when you can download one on your computer and keep abreast of the Civfanatics Forums at the same time?

You don't worry about food because your Mom puts it on the table for you. Your grades start to slip since you spend most of your time in class responding to Private Messages from Civfanatics on your iPod. But you don't care, because doing well in school was your old life. Your new life is to join the nearly-bedridden, rarely-shaving, force-fed, jobless, isolationist fellow members of the Civfanatics Forums and quite frankly, you're loving it!


I could still do with a new skateboard.

 

[Logik]

Granted you proceed to try to grind some railings at your local park but miscalculate badly and proceed to bust your tail down three flights of stairs,Ending up with a knot on your forehead the size of a grape fruit and a broken arm while your friends are howling on the ground with laughter.Then they proceed rag you about it for the next 6 months.You never pick up another skate board again.

I wish I knew whether intelligent alien life forms exists.

 

[BigTin]

Granted, but you learn about it seconds before you are incinerated along with the rest of the Earth from their DeathStar aka the Moon.

I wish I was able to travel back in time and see any historical event I wanted to while still being ble to return back to the present time and place I left.

 

[MaxaTheGreat]

Granted, however, people think you must be a witch and they burn you.

I wish I had EU3 already.

 

[W|M]

EDIT: 2x X-Post.

Granted: You are caught pirating it due to your sheer incompetence at acquiring it, and are put in jail, where all sorts of horrible encounters happen, including types of rape you never thought possible. By the time your sentence is up, you have gone completely insane.

Spoiler What post was going to be :

Granted. You successfully find an alien life form's scouting expedition to another part of their galaxy, and the aliens and humans are somehow immune to each other's diseases. The humans will eventually get the secrets of travelling at Ludicrous Speed. Although this life form and humans can and do both co-exist peacefully for a while, humans end up becoming more and more arrogant and demanding to the alien life form. The life form generally tolerates this, but there begins to be some discontent under the surface - They do not like being treated this way, and protest, but are laughed at by humans. With humans more and more confident and arrogant, they end up invading the alien home world and establishing themselves as overlords. The aliens were unable to fight back due to the massive surprise landing. The aliens are placed as second-class citizens to humans, and are brutally repressed at every turn, with each passing moment seeming to be more brutalizing. Although human leaders see that this shouldn't be happening, it is happening - Humans living on the alien world simply ignore the humans on Earth and give false reports of equality enjoyed by all. Eventually, an alien protest quickly escalates to civil war, and the humans are successfully driven out, but it isn't easy - Inch by bloody inch has to be taken by aliens, and humans do not give up easily, especially with brutal technologies. When the humans are finally driven out, the aliens become isolationist, convinced that humans lurk at every corner of space. For hundreds of years, as human history advances, the aliens have been looking into themselves and only finding hatred for their only contact with outsiders - Humans, although they gradually forget about exploring space and the outside world, as it is no longer safe or worthwhile. Suddenly, the aliens find their planet struck by a large meteorite, and begin to realize that there must be other things outside of their planet. However, they see humans at every turn, and the aliens themselves see the enemy beings of their childhoods, who kill and rape all in it's past. They become filled with hatred at the humans, and manage to construct a superweapon to destroy their planets. It is successful in destroying most of the galaxies, before the aliens conclude that the humans are gone and go home.

I wish for a teleporter.