Conspiracy Theories

[Traitorfish]

I'm a fan of the Assassin's Creed conceit that the entire history of the world has (always) been shaped by the struggle between the Assassins and the Templars.

That one skirts a little close to "Elders of Zion"-type theories for my taste. I don't think it's intentional, by any means- the Templars are consistently depicted as old white guys, while the Assassins are every ethnicity under the sun, from Arabs to Afro-Carribeans to even that most despised and abhorrent of races, the Welsh, and they consistently emphasise liberty over any sort of blood-and-soil weirdness- but it plays too unironically with the same tropes for me to feel entirely comfortable.

 

[Arakhor]

Well, the Templars are all about control and order (for our own good, naturally), so it makes perfect sense that they're all old, white guys and that the Assassins are the despised underclasses. I mean, even Ezio's family are Italian bankers. How despicable do you want to get?

 

[Kyriakos]

Not seeing how the assassins would gain power given (afaik) they were actually slaves to hashish to begin with, and used to fight the western forces by being promised more hashish and heaven and similar stuff.

While the templars supposedly were pretty much killed off by the king of France, in a similar style that a latter (non military) order was executed in the early 17th century (the jesuits). So both of those groups seem devoid of institutes of power, at least if it is inferred that they survived from the old orders.

Personally i find them boring as well. I prefer some kind of 'mass alien experiment', but i have to create my own version since there seems to not be any cool mythos around (reptilians are on the dumb side too, particularly due to youtube videos on them ).


Link to video.

 

[cybrxkhan]

That one skirts a little close to "Elders of Zion"-type theories for my taste. I don't think it's intentional, by any means- the Templars are consistently depicted as old white guys, while the Assassins are every ethnicity under the sun, from Arabs to Afro-Carribeans to even that most despised and abhorrent of races, the Welsh, and they consistently emphasise liberty over any sort of blood-and-soil weirdness- but it plays too unironically with the same tropes for me to feel entirely comfortable.

I've found the FREEEEEEDDDDOOOOOOMMMM vs. Order/Conformity/Evil distinction a bit unappealing. I mean, I know it's more complicated than that, but imy simple mind it boils down to "liberty and freedom and individualism booyah" vs. "booooooo conformity boooooooo not individualism." Which normally would be a West vs. Non-West sort of conflict, but I dunno. Maybe I'm overthinking things.

 

[Arakhor]

While the templars supposedly were pretty much killed off by the king of France, in a similar style that a latter (non military) order was executed in the early 17th century (the jesuits). So both of those groups seem devoid of institutes of power, at least if it is inferred that they survived from the old orders.

And that's what the Templars/Abstergo want you to 'know'. This is the conspiracy thread, after all.

 

[Rashiminos]

Jesus Christ is a fictional character based on the life of Julius Caesar.

 

[timtofly]

Fascist are a dime a dozen.

 

[Timsup2nothin]

Hands down The Illuminatus by Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea.

Believe the Free Masons are behind all sorts of crazy stuff...good, it's all there. And the Free Masons are actually run by the Illuminati, and they are behind every crazy thing that they can't run through the Free Masons as well. But for those really crazy ideas that even a secret order inside a secret order can't logically be blamed for...there's the Illuminatus, the singular master pulling the strings of the Illuminati and everything else that anyone with a tinfoil hat has ever thought of. Literally every conspiracy theory ever conceived is woven together into the whole cloth of the Illuminatus' grand plan.

It was hard to keep up with, at times seemed to make enough sense to make you look under the bed, and was hysterically funny throughout.

 

[gay_Aleks]

Aren't the Illuminati run by the lizardmen?

 

[timtofly]

Free Masons are just modern Templars. The Lizards have been in the background since before Egypt.

 

[ParkCungHee]

Aren't the Illuminati run by the lizardmen?

Worse. A meme generator.

 

[Kyriakos]

A problem with the replilian & earth order (eg illuminati) symbiosis is that (from a literary viewpoint, of course) it seems pretty dull and 3rd world/planet-like, cause you there have a high and secret caste made of humans, and above it an alien species, which again seems to be mostly interested in the same dumb stuff, whereas in a more elegant mythos (even in Lovecraft's) the aliens don't share almost anything with their human worshippers, the latter being pretty much some kind of deluded and often sacrifice-bound sect.

If you are going to have (in literature; in reality the dynamics obviously are different) some cast order involving alien overlords, then it is not a good idea to have the aliens be somewhat similar to the beings below them, but also have some special powers (shapeshifting).

All of which is not an argument against alien overlords existing (they might, i don't know, and obviously it would be horrible), but an elaboration on why i dislike that theory as well :\

 

[Aleksey_aka_al]

What is the most interesting and/or unlikely conspiracy theory that you have heard from somebody, either in RL or on the internet?

Stalin killed 1.5 billion people.

 

[Arakhor]

Stalin killed 1.5 billion people.

That sounds suspiciously like a political statement. It also sounds ridiculous.

 

[kochman]

Stalin killed 1.5 billion people.

Nah, just millions and millions.

 

[warpus]

Stalin personally baked a free loaf of bread for everyone in the Soviet Union and every other communist nation. He used his own flour.

 

[Timsup2nothin]

That sounds suspiciously like a political statement. It also sounds ridiculous.

That's probably why it appears in a thread about conspiracy theories.

 

[Grisu]

The Erfurt school shooting supposedly never happened...same for the boston marathon bombings (the victims shown were just actors, with movie-blood)

really, there's no conspiracy theory stupid enough that it won't find some followers. Maybe one of these days I'm going to try to come up with something so stupid that nobody ever will believe it. Now there's a challenge

 

[Kyriakos]

^Unlikely/Difficult to pull off/Highly alarming if true/etc, but 'stupid' isn't the correct term in those issues, in my view. At least it isn't less stupid to think the media/government tells you the truth, than to think they outright construct a lie. Sometimes the latter is more probable. Sadly even when it includes death(s).

Which (obviously) is not a comment on any specific event, but might include many events of that nature.

 

[gay_Aleks]

Stalin personally baked a free loaf of bread for everyone in the Soviet Union and every other communist nation. He used his own flour.

Considering the fact he owned the Soviet Union and Ukraine, he could, theoretically, use the flour that is "his", but in fact, is most likely not his.

And of course, that all communist leaders except for Gorby are murdering psychos that were this close to triggering a nuclear holocaust.